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Tony Kornheiser in DANGER...


Big Ernie McCracken
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I don't see where Cornheiser is better or worse than half the guys out there with his job.

 

He's got an overwhelming grasp of the obvious, he bends over for his booth mates as long as he gets a reach around, and he desperately wants to be Reggie Bush's love slave.

 

Like I said, no better or no worse than half the guys out there...

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I don't see where Cornheiser is better or worse than half the guys out there with his job.

 

He's got an overwhelming grasp of the obvious, he bends over for his booth mates as long as he gets a reach around, and he desperately wants to be Reggie Bush's love slave.

 

Like I said, no better or no worse than half the guys out there...

 

 

Speaking of an overwhelming grasp of the obvios, it's nice to be privy to your acumen again :D

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C'mon guy. It's true. Big time sports celebs do get the red carpet treatment. I don't think he's on his knees slobbin' Joe's knob.

 

If I'm hanging with Joe, I'm definitely putting him out front too.

 

Use the idiot and get the best seats in the house baby! :D

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So, he takes advantage of traveling with a recognized person to get a quicker, better seat and a good meal. What's the problem with that? Makes sense to me. I don't get the sense he agrees with much of what Theisman blabbers on the broadcast from what I've seen so far. I think he does a very understated job of pinning Theisman down on some of his comments and not arguing about it - yet. Just by pinning him down, it makes Theisman look ridiculous, without being disruptive like say, a Collinsworth. In my opinion, he takes a position by making Theisman talk so much and making him say things like he does, which are usually said for affect, anyway.

 

I think he's an interesting choice, someone who knows the game from a sportswriters perspective, pretty well-spoken, and as he gains the booth experience I think will hold his own well.

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he desperately wants to be Reggie Bush's love slave.

:D

I thought you'd reserved that position for me BB.

 

What did I do, to deserve you putting Kornheiser ahead of me, in the Bush love slave rankings?

 

I'm hurt BB. I thought we were tighter than that. :D

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C'mon guy. It's true. Big time sports celebs do get the red carpet treatment. I don't think he's on his knees slobbin' Joe's knob.

 

If I'm hanging with Joe, I'm definitely putting him out front too.

 

Use the idiot and get the best seats in the house baby! :D

 

Really? :D

 

With all the Joe-bashing that goes on around here.....and I'm one of them.....don't you think there are SOME places that would seat him in the bathroom? :D

 

Or ask him if he's there to fill out an application? :D

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Really? :D

 

With all the Joe-bashing that goes on around here.....and I'm one of them.....don't you think there are SOME places that would seat him in the bathroom? :D

 

Or ask him if he's there to fill out an application? :D

 

Hey if I were running the restaurant, that's exactly how I'd treat him.

 

But you know how it is with the uninformed. They'd be falling all over themselves to fawn on him.

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Hey if I were running the restaurant, that's exactly how I'd treat him.

 

 

See.....if I were still running a restaurant.....I'd approach the threesome like this:

 

"Mike! Nice to see you.....but you should have stuck to golf, my man."

 

"Tony, Tony, Tony.....who's your friend?" :D

 

Just to muck with them. :D

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Kornheiser is a polished version of Dennis Miller with significantly less hair and infinitely more football knowledge.

 

Theismann's best subject is Theismann. He's five pounds of shat in a one pound bag.

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ESPN's Tony Kornheiser sticks it to Joe Theismann on Monday night

ON FURTHER REVIEW, WE LOVE TONY

 

Though we don't know whether ESPN's Tony Kornheiser stuck it to Joey Sunshine on Monday night for his 180-degree reversal regarding Terrell Owens, a bought of insomnia had us tuning back in for garbage time of the Packers-Bengals game. In so doing, we witnessed an exchange that, in light of our new mission to persuade the folks in Bristol to relieve Joe Theismann of his duties, has caused us to pull a 180 of our own regarding Kornheiser, who given that he was in Cincinnati will be dubbed "Kornholer" for the remainder of this specific item.

 

After Cincinnati receiver Reggie McNeal caught a touchdown pass from Doug Johnson, a discussion ensued regarding college quarterbacks who become wideouts at the next level.

 

Here is, verbatim, the key portion of the conversation regarding the requirements for a successful conversion. (Thank you, TiVo.)

 

Sunshine: I think you need a guy who's short, vertically challenged, maybe five-foot-nine, five-foot-ten with a lot of 'quicks' that can double as a kick returner. Those are the guys that can transition into professional football. To come in and just try and play the wide receiver position --

 

Kornholer (incredulous): He has to be short?

 

Sunshine: Well --

 

Kornholer: This is a prerequisite, to be short?

 

Sunshine: I think you need to be short and quick. I think that gives you an opportunity --

 

Kornholer: What if you were big and quick?

 

Sunshine: You don't have the 'quicks' when you're that tall.

 

Kornholer: Correct me if I'm wrong because you watch a lot more college football than I did [Editor's note: Tony, you'd make a great lawyer], wasn't there a quarterback recently from Arkansas who was the quarterback who then became a wide receiver in the NFL?

 

Tirico: Matt Jones.

 

Kornholer: Matt Jones, right? And he's big. Big and quick.

 

Sunshine: But not at the kick returning position.

 

Kornholer: (Makes barely audible noise connoting "Is this guy f--king serious?")

 

Sunshine: No.

 

Tirico (changing the subject): It's 48 to 17. . . .

 

Tony, you've found your niche. It's to call out Joey Sunshine wherever and whenever he says something stupid. That's your calling. Your destiny. Through your weekly badgering of Theismann, he'll eventually be exposed for the fraud that he is, or he'll quietly resign and find a fifth-tier gig on CBS where the play-by-play man doesn't have the brains or the will to thoroughly and completely dismantle his stupid-### assertions.

 

So thanks, Tony. We underestimated you. And we're rooting for you to mentally do to Theismann every Monday night that which Lawrence Taylor accomplished only once physically.

:D

From PFT

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