Randall Posted September 16, 2008 Share Posted September 16, 2008 Nobody wants the Vikings to have a good quarterback. They know we’re just a competent signal-caller away from being a Super Bowl team and they’d rather have us suffer with Tarvaris Jackson than smoke all their asses and claim the Lombardi Trophy. In fact, there appears to be a flat-out league-wide conspiracy to keep the Vikes from getting their hands on a decent QB. We all know the Packers were dead-set against letting Brett Favre come here - hence the trade to the Jets, and the proviso that New York would have to give up 200 draft picks if Favre were then dealt to Minnesota. And now there’s a new culprit in this game of Viking offensive suppression, and his name is Jon Gruden. According to PFT’s Mike Florio, Gruden has offered disgruntled QB Jeff Garcia to a couple of teams in a trade, but not the Vikings - presumably because, if Garcia got on the Vikings, he would instantaneously pick up Brad Childress’s intricate and ingenious offense and lead us on a 14-game winning streak and thence onto glory. And that would make Gruden look bad especially if his anointed QB Brian Griese played like Brian Griese. Is this devious or what? Frankly, I think there needs to be an investigation. Columbo needs to be brought in or maybe Kojak or Kolchak the Night Stalker. Or maybe O.J. - he’s good at looking for the real perpetrators of things. Oh, that’s right - O.J.’s kind of busy right now. Well, one of those other guys then. They need to start turning over rocks and tapping phones and hiring whoever Bill Belichick uses to spy on other teams, so the truth of this conspiracy can be exposed. So far, we know Mike McCarthy and Ted Thompson are in on it, and Jon Gruden as well. What we don’t know is how deep this really goes. If there might be other measures being taken against us. Do we know the full story on how Bernard Berrian’s toe got messed up? Are we sure Visanthe Shiancoe isn’t being slipped some kind of drug that’s causing him to lose strength in his hands at critical moments in games? And what about Tarvaris Jackson himself? Is some kind of chicanery to blame for his utter ineptitude? Is the playbook he’s studying actually the Vikings playbook or a different one someone swapped in for it without him noticing? Someone may have snuck into his bedroom at night, tiptoed around his stuffed animals and snatched the real playbook from under his Jonas Brothers pillow. This would explain a lot of mysterious stuff: Like why T-Jack is handing off to Chester Taylor on 3rd and 5. It was actually supposed to be a 10-yard out to Bobby Wade. You know, a play that had a chance of netting the 5 yards necessary to get a 1st down. The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that the Vikings are victims of a massive plot. Until we uncover the truth of this scheme, and rid the league of those responsible, the Vikings will never have a fair shot at putting the Kick-Ass in the Kick-Ass Offense. http://thevikingage.com/2008/09/16/another-conspiracy/ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Savage Beatings Posted September 16, 2008 Share Posted September 16, 2008 Finally somebody had the guts to say it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CaptainHook Posted September 16, 2008 Share Posted September 16, 2008 Honestly, if they got a good quarterback, we'd all be saying how all they needed was some wide receivers. Cause they suck too. . . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Randall Posted September 16, 2008 Author Share Posted September 16, 2008 Finally somebody had the guts to say it. The Man is keeping the Vikings down. Mind you I'm not saying it isn't true. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
detlef Posted September 16, 2008 Share Posted September 16, 2008 Honestly, if they got a good quarterback, we'd all be saying how all they needed was some wide receivers. Cause they suck too. . . They don't even need a "good" QB. At least not "good" by NFL standards. They need a barely competent QB. They need a Balt edition Dilfer. They need someone who can manage to hit an open receiver 15 yards down field just to keep the chains moving. Someone who, when they decide to get crazy and throw it deep, doesn't throw something that better resembles a punt. It's staggering that they're letting that team go to waste in the hands of that dude. I know, I know, this is news to basically nobody. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bronco Billy Posted September 16, 2008 Share Posted September 16, 2008 A plausible explanation, but I think I'll continue to subscribe to the "Childress is a retard" theory. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alexgaddis Posted September 16, 2008 Share Posted September 16, 2008 Are we sure Visanthe Shiancoe isn’t being slipped some kind of drug that’s causing him to lose strength in his hands at critical moments in games? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MikesVikes Posted September 16, 2008 Share Posted September 16, 2008 I know a dude that could outplay Jackson and not take a decade to find out what he's doing. link Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SEC=UGA Posted September 16, 2008 Share Posted September 16, 2008 They could call one Mr. Culpepper? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
detlef Posted September 16, 2008 Share Posted September 16, 2008 They could call one Mr. Culpepper? Hell, they could call Uncle Rico. Word is, dude could throw it a 1/4 mile. If only the coach gave him a chance. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Randall Posted September 16, 2008 Author Share Posted September 16, 2008 They could call one Mr. Culpepper? Randall Cunningham was taking them to the Super Bowl. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
THE SIX KINGS Posted September 16, 2008 Share Posted September 16, 2008 Randall Cunningham was taking them to the Super Bowl. Typical Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
THE SIX KINGS Posted September 16, 2008 Share Posted September 16, 2008 It's a discussion of Minnesota QB's. riiiiiiiiiiight Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
femmefootball Posted September 17, 2008 Share Posted September 17, 2008 I can't believe people on the website thought it was a serious post... anyone else notice that? PS: & Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chief Dick Posted September 17, 2008 Share Posted September 17, 2008 Huard would be good there. We'll trade you back for Jared Allen. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ReturnToSender Posted September 17, 2008 Share Posted September 17, 2008 Kordell Stuart, where are you! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Medal of Honor Posted September 17, 2008 Share Posted September 17, 2008 They need Mike Tice... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Randall Posted September 17, 2008 Author Share Posted September 17, 2008 They need Mike Tice... They did have Moss and better QB's back then. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
__HAUSE__ Posted September 18, 2008 Share Posted September 18, 2008 (edited) They don't even need a "good" QB. At least not "good" by NFL standards. They need a barely competent QB. They need a Balt edition Dilfer. They need someone who can manage to hit an open receiver 15 yards down field just to keep the chains moving. Someone who, when they decide to get crazy and throw it deep, doesn't throw something that better resembles a punt. It's staggering that they're letting that team go to waste in the hands of that dude. I know, I know, this is news to basically nobody. Losman anybody....anybody?,.....Losman, anybody seen Losman? Edited September 18, 2008 by __HAUSE__ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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