Grits and Shins Posted September 14, 2014 Share Posted September 14, 2014 Where is this utopia you guys all live in where all you have to do is tell little Johnny he was bad and ask him politely to please stop that behavior and ta-da that is the end of said behavior. And in that utopia how the hell do we end up with violent criminals? Or am I to understand that violent criminals are that way because they were spanked as children and the good upstanding non-violent citizens are the ones that were never spanked and obeyed the polite requests of their parents to behave? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grits and Shins Posted September 14, 2014 Share Posted September 14, 2014 Said it before, saying it again. Corporal punishment is just one of the tools in a parent's tool kit. Each child is different and each occasion for discipline independent. It would be silly to only use corporal punishment, corporal punishment is the last resort. You use the form of punishment that best fits the child and the occasion. We spanked our kids when required and typically that was only a couple swats with a wooden spoon. Once the children learned that we would follow through on threatened consequences they weren't really required all that often. Then they reached the age where other negative consequences worked (like taking away the phone or car). 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vexco Posted September 14, 2014 Share Posted September 14, 2014 Said it before, saying it again. Corporal punishment is just one of the tools in a parent's tool kit. Each child is different and each occasion for discipline independent. It would be silly to only use corporal punishment, corporal punishment is the last resort. You use the form of punishment that best fits the child and the occasion. We spanked our kids when required and typically that was only a couple swats with a wooden spoon. Once the children learned that we would follow through on threatened consequences they weren't really required all that often. Then they reached the age where other negative consequences worked (like taking away the phone or car). Â Â Precisely. It's not the first course of action, but sometimes it's a necessary course of action. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MikesVikes Posted September 14, 2014 Share Posted September 14, 2014 Â Â No, not really. Â Â What is it then? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stevegrab Posted September 14, 2014 Share Posted September 14, 2014 My parents did the same to me. I don't really see an issue with it. I don't really think anyone should tell him how to parent, considering he's not abusing the child. Pansies. Â Â Not abusing the child, seriously? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stevegrab Posted September 14, 2014 Share Posted September 14, 2014 The debate as to whether this was right or wrong will never end. And the reasons for this have much to do with why the incident happened in the first place. Bottom line is we all had different upbringings. And when you have an internet forum with people from all over the country, the difference in opinion is highly prevalent. Our perceptions are shaped by how we relate to the situation and how we were brought up. Some of us got whooped on and don't see this as a huge deal; others had their nose put in a corner and are unable to stomach what they see. I can just imagine people in south Texas shaking their heads right about now. Watching as he's vilified in the media and thinking how ridiculous it is that a father is sitting in jail over this with his career in ruins. While others sit a thousand miles away not even knowing what a switch is. These are cultural differences. People in the south also eat pigs feet -- disgusting right? Â Adrian Peterson was raised this way. He got "switched" growing up so he was conditioned to think this was the norm, regardless of what YOU think. It does appear to be excessive in that it broke the skin, but he has acknowledged this. He has shown remorse for his actions prior to media coverage. Yet we want to crucify him because it's in the spotlight. I bet everyone with an opinion on this matter has something they swept under the rug. It's just that no one gives a sh*t. I don't agree with his method of discipline but I'm not going to tell him how to raise his children. Â All that being said this really boils down to his role model status and how he is held to a different standard. This will be blown way out of proportion because of who he is, and partially because of what he did. You won't see anyone in the media defending him either because it will put their own career in jeopardy, and that's all to sad. Does anyone know if the mother even bothered to phone the police? Hmmm. Â I have a 4-year-old and I couldn't imagine switching him to any degree, but I also understand the cultural differences of our upbringing. This is something that should have been taken care of between the mother and father. This is all so truly sad. Â I got hit growing up but don't think it is right, certainly not with scars AP put on his kid. Just because you were a certain way doesn't make repeating it right. If you're 4 and your parents cook, is ok to do it as an adult? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WildTurkey Posted September 14, 2014 Share Posted September 14, 2014 (edited) is it just me, or does anyone else, regardless of your feelings on spanking, whooping, or even just stern lecturing, feel that a guy who's not in his child's life the majority of the time hasn't "paid his dues" enough to have the right to administer that kind of discipline? It's my understanding Peterson has something like 5-7 kids, who he doesn't live with, and sees on limited occasions. If that's truly the case, to me you're nothing but a babysitter when you do get them. I understand he may provide for them financially, but if you don't have the personal relationship established, how can you "whoop" your kid to that extent and have the kid even comprehend that you also love and care for them? Â There has to be both sides established or else you're just the SoB that whips them when they DO get to see you in person (and not running through guys on TV). What a way to warp a kid's mindset. Add to the fact once you get to school and kids find out who's kid you are, they give you props for your dad ... the one you see once a month and during that quality time, whips you with a stick after sticking leaves in your mouth. Nice. Edited September 14, 2014 by WildTurkey 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
frenzal rhomb Posted September 14, 2014 Share Posted September 14, 2014 sorry, while I do not condone abusing animals, it is always worse to do it to humans. Surely you don't consider animals and humans to be equal - and if you say you do I expect you to tell me you are a vegan and do not use any animal byproducts at all. Â I didn't say a human isn't higher on the evolutionary chain. I said the amount of pain those dogs felt when having their scrotums torn from their bodies would be the equivalent of the pain you would feel in such a situation. And yeah I think its worse to torture a dog for the duration of its life than to discipline a child one time, even if it appears at first level to be excessive. My mom whipped my ass with a wooden spoon multiple times when I got out of line. I still hold her in higher regards than that POS Vick Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
frenzal rhomb Posted September 14, 2014 Share Posted September 14, 2014 sorry, while I do not condone abusing animals, it is always worse to do it to humans. Surely you don't consider animals and humans to be equal - and if you say you do I expect you to tell me you are a vegan and do not use any animal byproducts at all. Â I didn't say a human isn't higher on the evolutionary chain. I said the amount of pain those dogs felt when having their scrotums torn from their bodies would be the equivalent of the pain you would feel in such a situation. And yeah I think its worse to torture a dog for the duration of its life than to discipline a child one time, even if it appears at first level to be excessive. My mom whipped my ass with a wooden spoon multiple times when I got out of line. I still hold her in higher regards than that POS Vick Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MTSuper7 Posted September 14, 2014 Share Posted September 14, 2014 Said it before, saying it again. Corporal punishment is just one of the tools in a parent's tool kit. Each child is different and each occasion for discipline independent. It would be silly to only use corporal punishment, corporal punishment is the last resort. You use the form of punishment that best fits the child and the occasion. We spanked our kids when required and typically that was only a couple swats with a wooden spoon. Once the children learned that we would follow through on threatened consequences they weren't really required all that often. Then they reached the age where other negative consequences worked (like taking away the phone or car). Â Â I guess I only ever got to that last resort on a couple of occasions, and I concluded that the benefits didn't outweigh the costs. But you are spot on about the fact that each child is different and each occasion for discipline being different. Because I have no idea what your kids are like, nor you mine, then I can't possibly tell you that you are wrong to discipline a certain way, nor can you to me, as long as neither of us are crossing the line to abuse. And this thread reinforces that nobody can exactly agree where to draw that line. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
flemingd Posted September 14, 2014 Share Posted September 14, 2014 AP has three years remaining in his contract with the Vikings he is going to be making 11.7 million this year and then 12.7 next year earning a 2.4 million signing bonus. With his age (29) and the fact that he is now in the prime earnings of his contract I do not see him leaving the VIkings anytime soon. Even with this drama it is proven that time heals all things look at Vick as a prime example. Â Â None of that means jack. The threat isn't of him retiring, it's of him getting cut. He's only a $5M cap hit to cut this year, which would save them $9M this year (giving them more to roll into next year). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alphashado Posted September 14, 2014 Share Posted September 14, 2014 (edited) This is what it boils down to folks. AP is just the tip of the iceburg. Progressive states like Ca are not the majprity in this country. The NFL consists of gigantic overpaid thugs that grew up in small towns. They grew up seeing and doing all sorts of things that all of the politically correct people in states like Ca find appalling and unacceptable. They aren't monsters, they just grew up in different environments. If you start investigating all these players with microscopes, and suspending every one of them that isn't a choir boy, there will be no players left. There will be no NFL, and there will be no more fantasy football. Period. Edited September 14, 2014 by Alphashado Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
untateve Posted September 14, 2014 Share Posted September 14, 2014 No, not really. Â Â By legal definition, it is. In Florida, if you spank your child with an object, it is legally considered abuse. Now, you don't have to agree, but if you engaged in such activity in Florida, and a mandated reporter of abuse discovered this, you'd be voicing your disagreement to a judge/jury. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grits and Shins Posted September 14, 2014 Share Posted September 14, 2014 By legal definition, it is. In Florida, if you spank your child with an object, it is legally considered abuse. Now, you don't have to agree, but if you engaged in such activity in Florida, and a mandated reporter of abuse discovered this, you'd be voicing your disagreement to a judge/jury. Â Â He was indicted in Texas not Florida. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Papajohn Posted September 14, 2014 Share Posted September 14, 2014 Â Â By legal definition, it is. In Florida, if you spank your child with an object, it is legally considered abuse. Now, you don't have to agree, but if you engaged in such activity in Florida, and a mandated reporter of abuse discovered this, you'd be voicing your disagreement to a judge/jury. Â Â But in Florida you can just claim that you stood your ground!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
untateve Posted September 14, 2014 Share Posted September 14, 2014 He was indicted in Texas not Florida. Â Â sounds like the laws are similar or the mandated reporter (the doctor) would not have reported it and the state attorney would not have brought charges. Â I guess it would pay to know the laws of the state you reside in before beating a 4-yr-old with a switch and leaving welts/open cuts on him. I can see where it would be difficult for a typical adult to figure out if that behavior was abusive or not. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PiePuncher Posted September 14, 2014 Share Posted September 14, 2014 Peterson switched his kid for injuring another child if I'm not mistaken. Peterson may have taken it a little far but he was right in punishing his kid. There's lots of parents out there that don't care enough to punish their kids and you end up with the chitty kids/thugs that seem so common today. Like I said, Peterson may have gone a little overboard but at least it was for the right reason. Peterson is not a thug and doesn't want his kids to b thugs either. Peterson has worked hard to get where he is and while he did make a mistake, he's human. Years ago, it was fine to whoop your kid but today you get in trouble for it...Maybe that's why we have so many chit heads running around. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grits and Shins Posted September 14, 2014 Share Posted September 14, 2014 Peterson switched his kid for injuring another child if I'm not mistaken. Peterson may have taken it a little far but he was right in punishing his kid. There's lots of parents out there that don't care enough to punish their kids and you end up with the chitty kids/thugs that seem so common today. Like I said, Peterson may have gone a little overboard but at least it was for the right reason. Peterson is not a thug and doesn't want his kids to b thugs either. Peterson has worked hard to get where he is and while he did make a mistake, he's human. Years ago, it was fine to whoop your kid but today you get in trouble for it...Maybe that's why we have so many chit heads running around. Â Â Again I have not read a single thing on the case so I do not know how far AP did or did not go ... but if he crossed the line it is not acceptable to blow it off because "he is human" and "he made a mistake". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chloroform Rx Posted September 14, 2014 Share Posted September 14, 2014 I got hit growing up but don't think it is right, certainly not with scars AP put on his kid. Just because you were a certain way doesn't make repeating it right. If you're 4 and your parents cook, is ok to do it as an adult? Â Â I always tell people this; "There are reasons for everything, but few things are justified". This can be applied to just about any debate you see going on in the media. The reason Adrian Peterson did this was because of how he was brought up. He thought it was perfectly normal and judging by how he reacted to all of this, it definitely seems to be the case here. And if we're speaking to his character, the reasoning must not be overlooked. You have people all over the place calling him a piece of sh*t human being. I simply disagree with that sentiment. Now as for the justification -- there isn't any that I know of, but we don't know how the circumstances played out. IF he began using the switch AND the kid continued to defy him as if it had no effect on him, then that would explain the severity of the marks. Maybe the kid had choice words for him while it was happening. What if the kid killed a baby kitten? I know a kid who has done this which is why I'm using it as an example. There are too many variables at play here and people want to crucify him because of what's right on the surface. Â Regardless, if where he lives this act breaks the law then he should face the consequences. But is he a bad man in the way that he is being portrayed? I don't believe so. Should his career (even season) be in jeopardy? I don't think so! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PiePuncher Posted September 14, 2014 Share Posted September 14, 2014 I currently have an 8 year old son and I do not spank him but as a father, I understand where Peterson is coming from. I don't spank my son because once when he was 5, I spanked him hard enough that I left a red Mark on his rear and I saw the fear in my sons eyes. I felt horrible for spanking him but at the time, I felt my child deserved the whooping. Today, my son is awesome and a super sweet kid. I will never spank him again as I have made that mistake. Live and learn. Peterson admits he whooped him to much and seems to regret it. Hopefully he has learned from his mistakes and hopefully his child learned that hurting other children is wrong and if he does it again, there will be consequences 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pope Flick Posted September 14, 2014 Share Posted September 14, 2014 (edited) If you've seen the photos you cannot defend this in any way and not be a cretin. Disgusting. The kid is four years old. Â http://www.ijreview.com/2014/09/177641-see-photos-got-star-rb-adrian-peterson-indicted-child-abuse-decide-went-far/ Edited September 14, 2014 by Pope Flick Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PiePuncher Posted September 14, 2014 Share Posted September 14, 2014 Four year olds know right from wrong. My son could read and do math at 4. I don't agree with the switch but I understand why he did it. when I was younger, the switch was a common way to punish your child. I live in Texas and while I have never been switched by anyone, I have been spanked by belt , paddled in school and spanked with wooden spoon in school. I have also had my hand slapped with rulers. I'm 30 years old and while these methods of punishment are illegal today, they were fine 20 years ago and they did work to keep me out of trouble. We all view things differently. You may have voted for Obama but not me..As stated, we all view things differently and I believe Peterson had the right intentions in mind. He will pay for his mistakes and I hope he learns from it and I'm sure he will. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Big Dogs Posted September 14, 2014 Share Posted September 14, 2014 I would guess that many of the people on this board (including myself) got spankings growing up. When I was growing up, it was even still acceptable to get "swats" in school. I received swats in school all the way up to 6th grade. Not sure if I deserved all of them, but there were specific rules that I broke, and the consequence was a swat. I would consider myself fortunate that my punishments were never taken to the level of what I would consider abuse. The swats hurt like a _______, but I deserved them, and it definitely stopped me from making the same bad choices. I learned numerous times that there were consequences for the actions I took. Â At home, I also got swats from both my mom and dad, some were for breaking established rules that I knew about, and other times, they were for just stupid stuff that I really should have known better. I distinctly remember my mom saying one time a the phrase that most of us have probably heard that, "this is going to hurt me more than it's going to hurt you". At the time, I thought my mom was NUTS because the swats really hurt. Â Not until I was a parent did I really understand what my mom meant so many years ago. I have fortunately never had to give my daughters (who are 6 & 8) "swats". I've flicked them with my finger in the back of the head numerous times, and I've threatened a "swat" several times. I have also seen the look of fear in their eyes when I've needed to make that threat. They fortunately never pushed the issue however, the look of fear alone made me feel incredibly guilty inside. Â However, as a parent, I know that I have to and must be a parent and discipline them if they cross the specific line that I have set. I pray that they never cross that line, but if they do, there will be a consequence for their actions. Â I always tell my girls a phrase I learned long ago, "You choose the behavior, you choose the consequence." Good behavior = good consequence, and bad behaviors = bad consequence". It's taken them awhile to understand that they didn't actually get to choose their punishment when they broke the rules, but they are really starting to learn that if they break the rules, something's gonna happen that they really don't like. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PiePuncher Posted September 14, 2014 Share Posted September 14, 2014 That's a good read. The thump on the back of the head is the same thing I do to my son. It's just enough for him to know he's done wrong. After that, I take stuff away or put his little rear in the corner Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NAUgrad Posted September 15, 2014 Share Posted September 15, 2014 I gotta tell you that when I first heard this I thought it was complete BS that Peterson had been charged. But after I look at the pictures and the fact that there are a "lot" of hits on that boy I can honestly say that this is very disturbing. I used to get spanked as a kid only like 3-5 hits. This look like Peterson just kept hitting the kid. Legs, hands and it looks like his stomach as well. There has to be like 20 hits, maybe more. That is absolutely abuse. I have no issue if someone uses a switch a couple of time usually on the back of the legs or rear end. but hitting a kid that many times is way over the top. Â I do agree that different kids respond to different things. I've verbally jumped on my boy until I saw tears running down his face once. That's all I needed to see to know that I'd done enough and the point was made. But that's my boy who responds to verbal discipline. Some kids just don't care and you have no choice but to take it to the next level. Again, I'm totally fine with that. But there is absolutely a point at which it becomes abuse and not discipline. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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