Holding the door etc.

[MojoMan]

I wasn't brought up in the South although I live south of the Mason-Dixon line now. Still, I was brung up to say "Please," "Thank You," "Sir," "Ma'am" and do ch!t like holding doors, giving up my seat to a lady/older person, etc.

 

In the past, most of the time, when I conduct myself in such a manner, I done git ignored, treated like a doggone doorman, etc. Very few peeps says "Thank youze" to me.

 

So's I sez "F()ck 'em." Most of the time I don't do the "gentlemanly" thing unless it's a lady with a stroller, really old, blind person, etc. Jist last week, as I was walking down the street, a blind lady with a cane was about ready to crash into a tree and I grabbed her arm, warned her, and redirected her. She said "EXCUSE ME" like I was raping her so I apologized, disengaged, and left her on her way. I think her reaction was justified although I'm not gonna help the next blindie I encounter unless they actually hurt themselves. Chicken or egg?

 

Do those of you who adhere to Old World chivalry ever get pissed when you encounter this?

Edited July 8, 2006 by MojoMan

[montster]

my wife rides the subway every day to work. at rush hour, everyone bunches up near the doors and as soon as the people inside come off, everyone on the outside rushes in. when my wife was pregnant, she said the rudest people were the stuffy middle-aged guys in suits who would literally elbow her out the way to get on the trains. drove her nuts.

[Perchoutofwater]

I alway open the door, and hold it open for anyone within a few paces from the door. I usualy get up when I'm seated and someone else sits down male or female. If it's a female it is a respect thing if it is a male it is to shake his hand. The few exceptions are with people I work with on a daily basis, family, and very good friends. I don't do it for others, I do it for my own self respect.

[MojoMan]

I alway open the door, and hold it open for anyone within a few paces from the door. I usualy get up when I'm seated and someone else sits down male or female. If it's a female it is a respect thing if it is a male it is to shake his hand. The few exceptions are with people I work with on a daily basis, family, and very good friends. I don't do it for others, I do it for my own self respect.

 

 

It doesn't bother you if someone, for whom you hold the door, treats you like a doorman?

[cliaz]

Face it the human race is the rudist most self centered creatures in the world. I always hold doors for woman. Just this week I held a door for a stupid fat, fried fish eating, T.O. lipped b1tch boofer that didn't even say a world. Walked right past me like it was my job to hold the door for her.

 

I simply said "You are welcome" and she went into ghetto mode on me flapping her mouth (and her arm fat) and throwing her arms around like she owned the town.

[wiegie]

I alway open the door, and hold it open for anyone within a few paces from the door. I usualy get up when I'm seated and someone else sits down male or female. If it's a female it is a respect thing if it is a male it is to shake his hand. The few exceptions are with people I work with on a daily basis, family, and very good friends. I don't do it for others, I do it for my own self respect.

 

pretty much the same here

[Perchoutofwater]

It doesn't bother you if someone, for whom you hold the door, treats you like a doorman?

 

 

Nope, I get my self worth from within, not from how others treat me. If they treat me that way, it is on them, I did my part, and I can be happy with that.

[Chargerz]

I alway open the door, and hold it open for anyone within a few paces from the door. I usualy get up when I'm seated and someone else sits down male or female. If it's a female it is a respect thing if it is a male it is to shake his hand. The few exceptions are with people I work with on a daily basis, family, and very good friends. I don't do it for others, I do it for my own self respect.

 

 

 

pretty much the same here

 

+2

[cliaz]

Nope, I get my self worth from within, not from how others treat me. If they treat me that way, it is on them, I did my part, and I can be happy with that.

 

 

 

nothing personal perch but that's called being a door mat. People today are so rude and if no one corrects them, they will continue on doing that to people.

 

 

there is a difference between self worth and self respect, letting someone treat you rude is just wrong.

[spain]

I alway open the door, and hold it open for anyone within a few paces from the door. I usualy get up when I'm seated and someone else sits down male or female. If it's a female it is a respect thing if it is a male it is to shake his hand. The few exceptions are with people I work with on a daily basis, family, and very good friends. I don't do it for others, I do it for my own self respect.

 

+1.

[spain]

nothing personal perch but that's called being a door mat. People today are so rude and if no one corrects them, they will continue on doing that to people.

there is a difference between self worth and self respect, letting someone treat you rude is just wrong.

 

Wrong! Simply because other folks dont adhere to proper manners and etiquette, does not excuse me from doing so. It is my obligation to conduct myself with appropriate decorum whether other people appreciate it or not. It is not my obligation to correct others for their lack of it as I am not their parents. And attempting to do so is obviously bad manners on your part.

Edited July 8, 2006 by spain

[Yukon Cornelius]

i do it all the time.... seams to me its the old grumpy looking men that dont ever do it...

[nuke'em ttg]

i like openning doors for people...they automatically smile and say thank-you......guess my son has seen me do it so much that he has started doing it and gets a kick out of it......... ...only one bent old lady has ever burned me......

[spain]

seams to me its the old grumpy looking men that dont ever do it...

 

Why do you hate Aqualung, Skylive, and RocknRobn?

[Yukon Cornelius]

Why do you hate Aqualung, Skylive, and RocknRobn?

 

there not grumpy

[tbimm]

Nope, I get my self worth from within, not from how others treat me. If they treat me that way, it is on them, I did my part, and I can be happy with that.

 

Thats exactly how I feel.

I was taught to have manners and respect for other people and thats how it will be regardless of how others treat me!

[twiley]

I alway open the door, and hold it open for anyone within a few paces from the door. I usualy get up when I'm seated and someone else sits down male or female. If it's a female it is a respect thing if it is a male it is to shake his hand. The few exceptions are with people I work with on a daily basis, family, and very good friends. I don't do it for others, I do it for my own self respect.

 

Same here.

[Hardrocker]

I alway open the door, and hold it open for anyone within a few paces from the door. I usualy get up when I'm seated and someone else sits down male or female. If it's a female it is a respect thing if it is a male it is to shake his hand. The few exceptions are with people I work with on a daily basis, family, and very good friends. I don't do it for others, I do it for my own self respect.

 

 

[Hardrocker]

Wrong! Simply because other folks dont adhere to proper manners and etiquette, does not excuse me from doing so. It is my obligation to conduct myself with appropriate decorum whether other people appreciate it or not. It is not my obligation to correct others for their lack of it as I am not their parents. And attempting to do so is obviously bad manners on your part.

 

 

Perch and Spain...

Your mama's done quite well...

[Hardrocker]

nothing personal perch but that's called being a door mat. People today are so rude and if no one corrects them, they will continue on doing that to people.

there is a difference between self worth and self respect, letting someone treat you rude is just wrong.

 

 

 

Cliaz, you are right there is a difference between self worth and self respect. And I understand what you mean about how rude others are...but I just dont think calling people out for it is gonna make a difference and doing the right thing for you and I does not require someone else to do the right thing...nor should it be the reason we did something anyway.

 

I think you can have self respect without great deal of self worth. I dont see how you can have self worth without self respect.

[Squeegiebo]

I generally hold the door for anyone who is close behind me, and go out of my way to wait and hold it for elderly people, people in wheel chairs, on crutches, carrying a lot of stuff, or with little children.

 

On the bus or subway, I'll give up my seat to anyone seatless who needs to sit more than I do - pretty much the same group listed above.

 

It's not a chivalry-gender thing; it's a common curtesy thing. Sure there are people who don't apreciate it. But I'm not going to be a jerk to everyone because some people are jerks to me.

[spain]

I generally hold the door for anyone who is close behind me, and go out of my way to wait and hold it for elderly people, people in wheel chairs, on crutches, carrying a lot of stuff, or with little children.

 

Ambulance chasing doesnt count...

[Chavez]

Wrong! Simply because other folks dont adhere to proper manners and etiquette, does not excuse me from doing so. It is my obligation to conduct myself with appropriate decorum whether other people appreciate it or not. It is not my obligation to correct others for their lack of it as I am not their parents. And attempting to do so is obviously bad manners on your part.

 

Thank you Judith Crane.

[Chavez]

Golden rule - treat others as you would like to be treated; as perch said, if they are ass holes, it isn't your problem. Even if they are taking your good manners for granted, it doesn't matter - YOU are doing the right thing, which is the important part. Generally being polite takes zero or only slightly more time than being a turd, so it's not as if you're cutting off your arm to help someone, it's a small inconvenience, and you should focus on feeling good for acting like something resembling a human being rather than feeling unappreciated because nobody said "thank you" or whatever.

[The Holy Roller]

I alway open the door, and hold it open for anyone within a few paces from the door. I usualy get up when I'm seated and someone else sits down male or female. If it's a female it is a respect thing if it is a male it is to shake his hand. The few exceptions are with people I work with on a daily basis, family, and very good friends. I don't do it for others, I do it for my own self respect.

 

 

Well said. Same here. I do it for my own self-respect. If they are doochbags, that's their problem.