Skippy Posted September 28, 2006 Share Posted September 28, 2006 Yesterday I give a work buddy of mine a ride. I am dropping him off at a crowed corner so that he can get on some public transportation to make it the rest of the way home. There are three of us, all men, in the car. I pull up next to the crowed intersection and as he opens the door and steps out I scream at him, “Get the yump out you cheating bastard. You want to ruin what we have by sleeping around with dirty geezers like that then don’t bother coming home tonight”. He is just stunned as he stands there looking back at me and I drive away. The next day he comes into work and tells me that a few of those people got on the incline with him and even worse two of them lived right across the street from him. I can’t help it but to laugh my ass off every time I think of this and all the people that we work with got a hugh kick out of the story. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dmarc117 Posted September 28, 2006 Share Posted September 28, 2006 Yesterday I give a work buddy of mine a ride. I am dropping him off at a crowed corner so that he can get on some public transportation to make it the rest of the way home. There are three of us, all men, in the car. I pull up next to the crowed intersection and as he opens the door and steps out I scream at him, “Get the yump out you cheating bastard. You want to ruin what we have by sleeping around with dirty geezers like that then don’t bother coming home tonight”. He is just stunned as he stands there looking back at me and I drive away. The next day he comes into work and tells me that a few of those people got on the incline with him and even worse two of them lived right across the street from him. I can’t help it but to laugh my ass off every time I think of this and all the people that we work with got a hugh kick out of the story. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skippy Posted September 28, 2006 Author Share Posted September 28, 2006 You all know what yump is but geezers = b astards. However, I think I like geezers better. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
loaf Posted September 28, 2006 Share Posted September 28, 2006 ol dirty geezer does have a nice ring to it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chiefjay Posted September 28, 2006 Share Posted September 28, 2006 That's a tough one. Very funny of course but maybe not to the right person. My wife and I do this stuff all the time in grocery stores, mall, etc.. obviously not that exact situation but saying funny stuff in front of STRANGERS to get a reaction out of them and to embarrass the other. If Puddy ever did that to me I would kick his asz and CHUCK's asz. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cre8tiff Posted September 28, 2006 Share Posted September 28, 2006 That is funny AND you are warped. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Puddy Posted September 28, 2006 Share Posted September 28, 2006 (edited) If Puddy ever did that to me I would kick his asz and CHUCK's asz. Given that you are the only accountant I know with a tattoo, I'll take your word for it. Now Chuck also has a tattoo and isn't an accountant so I'll have to give him the edge. Oh and that's good stuff Skippy. Although shouldn't this be a poll. Edited October 1, 2006 by Puddy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Holy Roller Posted September 28, 2006 Share Posted September 28, 2006 It is a tragically hilarious story. Hopefully he'll have a sense of humor about it and come back with something just as witty. Reminds me of something we did at a Cardinals game a couple of years ago. A couple of girls that were with us (just slightly underage) went down to the railing during warm-ups and yelled, "Hey, the tests came back positive! Just wanted you to know!" Many players on both teams gave their full attention. The ushers made them return to their seats. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skylive5 Posted September 28, 2006 Share Posted September 28, 2006 You being warped is a given... sorry.... but true. As for the story... yes, it is funny. In fact it is a great story. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rocknrobn26 Posted September 28, 2006 Share Posted September 28, 2006 Agree! I knew you were warped when you asked the blackjack dealer if he/she was a 'Lying, 2 faced, S*O*B!' I think even the pit boss was speechless! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
spain Posted September 28, 2006 Share Posted September 28, 2006 Funny story no doubt! Although I personally would never try to embarrass anyone like that... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cameltosis Posted September 28, 2006 Share Posted September 28, 2006 Reminds me of when we were in high school driving by our Vice Principal, the passengers would duck down to give the appearance the driver was the only one in the car. One of us would then yell azzhole or somethign of the sort. Childish, yes. Warped, maybe. Funny, definately. Your story is much funnier though. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rocknrobn26 Posted September 28, 2006 Share Posted September 28, 2006 Funny story no doubt! Although I personally would never try to embarrass anyone like that... Is the Tropicana Security dept still after you? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
twiley Posted September 28, 2006 Share Posted September 28, 2006 Funny story no doubt! Although I personally would never try to embarrass anyone like that... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skippy Posted September 29, 2006 Author Share Posted September 29, 2006 Agree! I knew you were warped when you asked the blackjack dealer if he/she was a 'Lying, 2 faced, S*O*B!' I think even the pit boss was speechless! Yes that was pretty good. I think the dealer was a little confused at that point and didn't know if I was going to need security or just another drink. Funny story no doubt! Although I personally would never try to embarrass anyone like that... You are the one person that I knew would have no problem with this. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Squeegiebo Posted September 29, 2006 Share Posted September 29, 2006 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Riffraff Posted October 1, 2006 Share Posted October 1, 2006 Good stuff. Messing with co-workers is always fun (as long as no one gets fired and the office atmosphere allows it): * Re-arrange someone's office/desk when they are out sick (anal retentive types really love this). * Make a confetti slingshot fire when a co-worker opens their locker (we have a gym at work). Confetti (or paper hole punches) in the company car air vents work well too. * Change people's Windows logon or logoff or error .wav file to scream "I love gay porn!" (must have admin rights to the computer) * Take a screenshot of thier normal desktop, then save it as their desktop background. (move real icons into a single folder and hide the taskbar) * Set someone's internet homepage to a website that produces 20 pop-ups of the inappropriate type. (Or http://www.funnyjunk.com/pages/haha.htm ) * Swap thier "m" and "n" keys on their keyboard. (if they use those letters in their logon password, getting them reset a few times in a day is always good for a laugh) * Have a gift wrapped weeener pump delivered to the office on the boss' birthday. (you know to counter those suck-ups that throw "let's get the boss a cake" functions). * Have a friend PA you using using your own voice to get you out of a meeting (recorded, undisguised). * Depending upon the type of phone system you have, you can pop open the bottom of the handset and put a piece of onion in there. Tears should occur and if they use the phone enough, their nose will run. * The Fart Machine can be used in select locations. * Hand out Cluepons ( http://www.jillsjokeline.com/cluepon.html ) * Put sticky notes on everyone's monitor to "see me when you come in" and sign the bosses name. (make sure you go see him/her as well) * Hang Demotivator pictures on the wall. ( http://despair.com/viewall.html ) * Put magnetic bumper stickers on people's cars. If they hate something, there is a bumper sticker for it. * Park a tricycle in a ViP parking spot. Preferrably one with pom-pom handlebars and a basket if it's a guy's spot. Take pictures. Yes, I tend to get in trouble from time to time. Don't be a prankster if you suck at your job. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SteelBunz Posted October 2, 2006 Share Posted October 2, 2006 VERY funny stuff, Skippy. Now....your coworker, on the other hand, needs to learn a little finesse. If he'd simply laughed it off....his neighbors would have gotten the joke. Now, however.....he'll probably have one or two of them showing up on his doorstep for.....ummmm.....a cup of sugar. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
detlef Posted October 2, 2006 Share Posted October 2, 2006 VERY funny stuff, Skippy. Now....your coworker, on the other hand, needs to learn a little finesse. If he'd simply laughed it off....his neighbors would have gotten the joke. Now, however.....he'll probably have one or two of them showing up on his doorstep for.....ummmm.....a cup of sugar. Very good point here. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Yukon Cornelius Posted October 2, 2006 Share Posted October 2, 2006 (edited) That's a tough one. Very funny of course but maybe not to the right person. My wife and I do this stuff all the time in grocery stores, mall, etc.. obviously not that exact situation but saying funny stuff in front of STRANGERS to get a reaction out of them and to embarrass the other. myself and the lifepartner do the same Edited October 2, 2006 by Yukon Cornelius Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skippy Posted October 3, 2006 Author Share Posted October 3, 2006 myself and the lifepartner do the same Oh yes, she is one of my favorite targets. In fact just yesterday while at the super market, (she was driving me crazy), I yelled from the Feminine Wash area, "do you want the powder or the medicated cream? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SteelBunz Posted October 3, 2006 Share Posted October 3, 2006 Oh yes, she is one of my favorite targets. In fact just yesterday while at the super market, (she was driving me crazy), I yelled from the Feminine Wash area, "do you want the powder or the medicated cream? Or yelling....The SUPER PLUS dork corks or those GI-NORMOUS pads with wings??? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ziachild007 Posted October 3, 2006 Share Posted October 3, 2006 Funny stuff Skip. Good stuff. Messing with co-workers is always fun (as long as no one gets fired and the office atmosphere allows it): * Re-arrange someone's office/desk when they are out sick (anal retentive types really love this). * Make a confetti slingshot fire when a co-worker opens their locker (we have a gym at work). Confetti (or paper hole punches) in the company car air vents work well too. * Change people's Windows logon or logoff or error .wav file to scream "I love gay porn!" (must have admin rights to the computer) * Take a screenshot of thier normal desktop, then save it as their desktop background. (move real icons into a single folder and hide the taskbar) * Set someone's internet homepage to a website that produces 20 pop-ups of the inappropriate type. (Or http://www.funnyjunk.com/pages/haha.htm ) * Swap thier "m" and "n" keys on their keyboard. (if they use those letters in their logon password, getting them reset a few times in a day is always good for a laugh) * Have a gift wrapped weeener pump delivered to the office on the boss' birthday. (you know to counter those suck-ups that throw "let's get the boss a cake" functions). * Have a friend PA you using using your own voice to get you out of a meeting (recorded, undisguised). * Depending upon the type of phone system you have, you can pop open the bottom of the handset and put a piece of onion in there. Tears should occur and if they use the phone enough, their nose will run. * The Fart Machine can be used in select locations. * Hand out Cluepons ( http://www.jillsjokeline.com/cluepon.html ) * Put sticky notes on everyone's monitor to "see me when you come in" and sign the bosses name. (make sure you go see him/her as well) * Hang Demotivator pictures on the wall. ( http://despair.com/viewall.html ) * Put magnetic bumper stickers on people's cars. If they hate something, there is a bumper sticker for it. * Park a tricycle in a ViP parking spot. Preferrably one with pom-pom handlebars and a basket if it's a guy's spot. Take pictures. Yes, I tend to get in trouble from time to time. Don't be a prankster if you suck at your job. You would fit right in where I work. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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