Foster Kids

[spain]

I went to our company Christmas party tonight. One couple there was a guy that works for our company who is ~50 years old. He and his wife, a school teacher, took in a couple of young boys ages 7 and 5 about a year ago as foster parents. The boys mom had been in and out of jail. She was killed in an accident a few weeks ago. When they took the kids to the dentist for the 1st time about 8 months ago, it was discovered that the oldest kid had had several teeth broken and his jaw had been broken, twice. These boys have been through some pretty horrific chit.

 

Anyway, I was talking to his wife tonight and she was telling me how the kids described how their mom smoked crack all the time. They know how to cook up crack and how to smoke it. How f'ed up is that for an a 7 and 5 year old kid? My theory has always been that you can survive with a bad dad, or without a dad for that matter, as I knew virtually no kid my age that had a dad worth a chit. But if your Mama is bad, you are completely screwed. You simply can not recover from a bad mama. Call me sexist or non p.c. but that is the way I feel. Anyway, these kids have had the absolute WORST mama and no Daddy. They are going to have some serious issues going forward.

 

But my friend and his wife are trying to make a difference. They are doing something to positively affect some other peoples lives. They are making a difference, or are at least trying to do so. I told them that I admire them for doing so and that I would like to make a difference in the lives of some f'n kid with a jacked up life. And I intend to do just that as soon as my own kids get a little older. This is where I will affect positive change in this world. This is what I will personally do. I will help some of these kids who need somebody.

[Puddy]

I would like to make a difference in the lives of some f'n kid with a jacked up life.

 

- reminds me of Matt Dillon talking about how he 'loves those retards' in Something About Mary.

 

 

 

 

 

Oh and that's a pretty sad story. If you do follow through on your plan, I will admire you for being more than the racist, gambling degenerate you are today.

[spain]

If you do follow through on your plan, I will admire you for being more than the racist, gambling degenerate you are today.

Uh, the plan is to take in a few black kids and teach them to be white. I just dont know how to ring that dam rythm out of them...

[untateve]

I wish you good luck in your endeavor. Many of these kids are so damaged by the time they are 5-7, it is my opinion they cannot be fixed.

 

It is my opinion, based on experience-not research, that if the abuse/neglect is serious enough when the child is young (age 2-4), they can become damaged beyond reparation. It is during this age that children learn to form relationships. The brain is also developing at a pretty amazing rate. Once they stop seeing people as people and view them as objects...in my view it's all over. We don't have the knowledge or ability to correct this.

 

I saw an 11-yr-old boy about a year ago at the detention center. His name is burned in my brain because I am relatively certain that he is going to murder a person or persons. This will not happen because he is a cruel or sadistic person, but because someone is going to be in the way when he wants something. For example, if you want the mayo at the back of the refrigerator, you move the milk out of the way to get it. If he wants the chain around your neck, he's going to move you out of the way to get it.

 

This boy was heading to a 6-month residential dept of juv justice program because of the number of charges he had. I honestly believe that he did not care. This kid, in broad daylight, was breaking into cars in his neighborhood to steal things out of them. He matter of factly told me that he wanted what was inside. No remorse, no fear.

 

He has set fires, just to watch them burn. People in the neighborhood are afraid of this (small, weak-looking) kid. I was doing a mental status exam and asked "What is the thing to do if you saw thick smoke from the window of your neighbor's house?" He first asked if the house was right next to his or not because he'd never seen a house burn down and thought this might be interesting.

 

Oh, he was horribly abused and neglected from around birth until he placed in foster care when he was about 5.

[NSab]

Scary stuff, some women should have to be spayed.

[Big John]

 

You may want to talk with Cre8tiff, as he is a foster parent.

[The Holy Roller]

I could overwhelm you with some of the sad cases I have seen. We have a family in our school district who for whatever reason has had at least a dozen foster kids in the last five years. They are all middle school age (11-14) and I have had them all in class. These folks are white but the kids are from white, black, mixed, you name it. Most were terribly abused. Several were exactly like unta's description, no sense of fear or right/wrong. Once one of them got a gun and brought it to school. (He was caught when one of the other kids told someone. He, of course, is long gone). I haven't seen any of them graduate. But when they're in my class I try to treat them just like all the other kids. I try to let them know that just because their life started out on the Athenaty end of the stick they don't have to stay that way.

 

 

Some people shouldn't be allowed to have kids. I had an idea once to help with this problem. When a kid graduates from high school they should be given a choice. They wil be given a brand new car of their choice IF they agree to get sterilized. They dumb ones would be gone in a generation.

Edited December 10, 2006 by The Holy Roller