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dmarc117

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http://www.breitbart.com/article.php?id=D8...icle=1&catnum=0

 

House Members Seek Pay Raise of $4,400

 

WASHINGTON (AP) - Despite low approval ratings and hard feelings from last year's elections, Democrats and Republicans in the House are reaching out for an approximately $4,400 pay raise that would increase their salaries to almost $170,000.

 

:D

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Thank you Nancy Pelosi!

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Here is a better joke:

 

Two Alabama Rednecks, Jim and Bob, are sitting at their favorite bar, drinking beer. Jim turns to Bob and says, "You know, I'm tired of going through life without an education. Tomorrow I think I'll go to the community college and sign up for some classes." Bob agrees that it's a good idea.

The next day, Jim goes down to the college and meets the Dean of Admissions, who signs him up for four basic classes: Math, English, History, and Logic.

 

"Logic?" Jim asks, "what's that?"

The dean says, "I'll show you. Do you own a lawnmower?"

 

"Yeah."

 

"Then logically speaking, because you own a lawnmower, I think that you would have a yard."

 

"That's true, I do have a yard."

 

"I'm not done," the dean says. "Because you have a yard, I think logically that you would have a house."

 

"Y es, I do have a house!"

 

"And because you have a house, I think that you might logically have a family."

 

"I have a family."

 

"I'm not done yet. Because you have a family, then logically you must have a wife."

 

"Yes, I do have a wife."

 

"And because you have a wife, then logic tells me you must be heterosexual."

 

"I am heterosexual. That's amazing, you were able to find out all of that because I have a lawnmower."

 

Excited to take the class now, Jim shakes the Dean's hand and leaves to go meet Bob at the bar. He tells Bob about his classes, how he has signed up for Math, English, History and Logic.

 

"Logic?" Bob says, "What's that?"

 

"I'll show you," says Jim. "Do you have a lawnmower?"

 

"No."

 

"Then you're a queer."

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Here is a better joke:

 

Two Alabama Rednecks, Jim and Bob, are sitting at their favorite bar, drinking beer. Jim turns to Bob and says, "You know, I'm tired of going through life without an education. Tomorrow I think I'll go to the community college and sign up for some classes." Bob agrees that it's a good idea.

The next day, Jim goes down to the college and meets the Dean of Admissions, who signs him up for four basic classes: Math, English, History, and Logic.

 

"Logic?" Jim asks, "what's that?"

The dean says, "I'll show you. Do you own a lawnmower?"

 

"Yeah."

 

"Then logically speaking, because you own a lawnmower, I think that you would have a yard."

 

"That's true, I do have a yard."

 

"I'm not done," the dean says. "Because you have a yard, I think logically that you would have a house."

 

"Y es, I do have a house!"

 

"And because you have a house, I think that you might logically have a family."

 

"I have a family."

 

"I'm not done yet. Because you have a family, then logically you must have a wife."

 

"Yes, I do have a wife."

 

"And because you have a wife, then logic tells me you must be heterosexual."

 

"I am heterosexual. That's amazing, you were able to find out all of that because I have a lawnmower."

 

Excited to take the class now, Jim shakes the Dean's hand and leaves to go meet Bob at the bar. He tells Bob about his classes, how he has signed up for Math, English, History and Logic.

 

"Logic?" Bob says, "What's that?"

 

"I'll show you," says Jim. "Do you have a lawnmower?"

 

"No."

 

"Then you're a queer."

 

 

 

Now that's funny

 

I would assume then that all people who have high grass growing in their yards are gay ...my neighbor has high grass in his yard ...but he also sunbathes wearing a mickey mouse thong , while listening to whamm while sipping pink zinfandel so I probably should have figured out regardless of no lawnmower

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Here is a better joke:

 

Two Alabama Rednecks, Jim and Bob, are sitting at their favorite bar, drinking beer. Jim turns to Bob and says, "You know, I'm tired of going through life without an education. Tomorrow I think I'll go to the community college and sign up for some classes." Bob agrees that it's a good idea.

The next day, Jim goes down to the college and meets the Dean of Admissions, who signs him up for four basic classes: Math, English, History, and Logic.

 

"Logic?" Jim asks, "what's that?"

The dean says, "I'll show you. Do you own a lawnmower?"

 

"Yeah."

 

"Then logically speaking, because you own a lawnmower, I think that you would have a yard."

 

"That's true, I do have a yard."

 

"I'm not done," the dean says. "Because you have a yard, I think logically that you would have a house."

 

"Y es, I do have a house!"

 

"And because you have a house, I think that you might logically have a family."

 

"I have a family."

 

"I'm not done yet. Because you have a family, then logically you must have a wife."

 

"Yes, I do have a wife."

 

"And because you have a wife, then logic tells me you must be heterosexual."

 

"I am heterosexual. That's amazing, you were able to find out all of that because I have a lawnmower."

 

Excited to take the class now, Jim shakes the Dean's hand and leaves to go meet Bob at the bar. He tells Bob about his classes, how he has signed up for Math, English, History and Logic.

 

"Logic?" Bob says, "What's that?"

 

"I'll show you," says Jim. "Do you have a lawnmower?"

 

"No."

 

"Then you're a queer."

 

Logic error there.

Edited by Big John

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All I'm saying is I have a lawnmower. :D

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"I'll show you," says Jim. "Do you have a lawnmower?"

 

"No."

 

"Then you're a queer."

 

 

 

:D

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