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Disfunction Junction

My girlfriend likes to call me Daddy,,,a little to much!

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Did you extra decline ?

 

I had drunk probably a rack of Spaetenbrau, so I figured, "What could it hurt?" We had roughhouse, freaky, nasty monkey sex, then I took her to the shower, gave her what she asked for and received some happymouthfuntime. Then I told her to clean up and go home. She thanked me... no joke, but I declined a goodbye kiss as she was leaving.

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Go to the pet store and buy twenty of those 10 lbs cedar chips they use to line hamster cages with. Grab an aquarium air pump and then swing by an arts and craft store and pick up a hot glue gun, some blue and purple sequence and a bunch of fake flowers. Then head over to a party store and grab some fake teeth.

 

What you want to do here is convince her that she has to do whatever you ask. Shouldn’t be hard since she likes the spanking deal.

 

Pour the cedar chips all over the bed and lay out all the items around you. You need to be naked [of course]. Put the fake teeth in your mouth and ask her to decorate your balls with the sequence using the glue gun and then to shove the hose in your [edit] and turn it on all the while you will be singing “Shadow Dancing” by the Bee-Gees and throwing fake flowers at her feet.

 

That was the funniest thing I have read all day.. Good stuff Cliaz

 

For me, I love em freaky... I have had girlfriends and hook-ups that liked to be choked, slapped in the face, boobs slapped around, nipples pinched to the point of extreme pain, DP with me and a toy, throat gagging.. Ah, the good old days..

 

My wife is freaky in her own right.. I wouldn't have it any other way.. But, she is preggers with our 3rd kid in 4 years.. So, that part of our life is on hold.

 

:D

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I had drunk probably a rack of Spaetenbrau, so I figured, "What could it hurt?" We had roughhouse, freaky, nasty monkey sex, then I took her to the shower, gave her what she asked for and received some happymouthfuntime. Then I told her to clean up and go home. She thanked me... no joke, but I declined a goodbye kiss as she was leaving.

If you weren't a gay "male" nurse this would make mah pants tight.

Edited by Hugh 0ne

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Nothing better than hooking up with a freaky chick. Too unstable to marry though, but enjoy the ride. And if she breaks out the school girl uniform...:D

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If you weren't a gay "male" nurse this would make mah pants tight.

 

It's cool, brother. I'd pee on you, too, if you buy the beer. Just no hot nasty monkey sex first. :D

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my favorite of all time was..

 

"I only take it on my face."

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I had drunk probably a rack of Spaetenbrau, so I figured, "What could it hurt?" We had roughhouse, freaky, nasty monkey sex, then I took her to the shower, gave her what she asked for and received some happymouthfuntime. Then I told her to clean up and go home. She thanked me... no joke, but I declined a goodbye kiss as she was leaving.

 

 

Dont get me wrong I took a dump on her..But pee ?? :D

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turn it on all the while you will be singing “Shadow Dancing” by the Bee-Gees

That was sung by Andy Gibb, not his brothers :D

 

 

 

:D

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Dont get me wrong I took a dump on her..But pee ?? :D

I figured the hot Carl card would be played eventually.

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I figured the hot Carl card would be played eventually.

 

 

Someone dumped on our IT guy ?

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That was sung by Andy Gibb, not his brothers :D

:D

 

You really shouldn't know that.

 

 

Is a hot Carl the same thing as a hot lunch?

 

 

Except you eat a bowl full of corn and peanuts

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Dont get me wrong I took a dump on her..But pee ?? :D

 

wow, you crossed the line there. That's how Hitler got started.

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where's the lil catholic girl outfit?? reprimand her for her bad grades

 

Now that's what I'm talking about......

 

Dude, you have hit the lottery. Enjoy it.

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