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Stuff my Dad says...


TimC
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twitter.com/stuffmydadsays...but replace stuff. :wacko:

 

 

This should be funny to copy and paste and let the filter have it's fun...

 

_______________________

 

"It's just a when I wore my first dressing june bug, calm down. Jesus Christ, what happens when something bigger than a testicle attacks you?"

about 17 hours ago from web "What are you listening to?...I know who Hall & Oates are god dammit. It's the mustache guy and the gay man."

11:16 AM Sep 1st from web "I just did an hour on the gym machine. I'm sweaty and I have to poopy. Where's my fannypack, this workout is over."

10:36 AM Aug 31st from web to my bro-"Your baby dropped his binky. The binky is on the table. THE BINKY IS ON THE TABLE. BINKY ON TABLE. PICK.UP.THE.BINKY. Thank you."

9:39 PM Aug 30th from web (watching the Little League World Series) "These kids are all fat. I remember when you were in little league.... You were fat."

2:07 PM Aug 29th from web "You know, sometimes it's nice having you around. But now ain't one of those times. Now gimmie the remote we're not watching this bullpoopy."

11:18 AM Aug 28th from web "Your mother rented this film, What Happens In Vegas. I thought it was going to be non-fiction, but it's fiction, and it's about some idiot.

10:38 AM Aug 27th from web "The dog don't like you planting stuff there. It's his backyard. If you're the only one who poopys in something, you own it. Remember that."

9:33 AM Aug 26th from web "How the when I wore my first dress should I know if it's still good? Eat it. You get sick, it wasn't good. You people, you think I got microscopic when I wore my first dressing eyes."

1:55 PM Aug 25th from web "Who is this woman?....Kate Beckinsale? Well, you can tell Kate Beckinsale she sucks."

8:07 PM Aug 24th from web "You need to flush the toilet more than once...No, YOU, YOU specifically need to. You know what, use a different toilet. This is my toilet."

1:07 PM Aug 23rd from web "Don't touch the bacon, it's not done yet. You let me handle the bacon, and i'll let you handle..what ever it is you do. I guess nothing."

11:15 AM Aug 22nd from web "Your mother made a batch of meatballs last night. Some are for you, some are for me, but more are for me. Remember that. More. Me."

8:57 AM Aug 21st from web "Your brother brought his baby over this morning. He told me it could stand. It couldn't stand for poopy. Just sat there. Big let down."

9:35 AM Aug 20th from web "Love this Mrs. Dash. The bitch can make spices... Jesus, Joni (my mom) it's a joke. I was making a joke! Mrs. Dash isn't even real dammit!"

9:28 AM Aug 19th from web "The dog is not bored, it's a when I wore my first dressing dog. It's not like he's waiting for me to give him a when I wore my first dressing rubix cube. He's a god damned dog."

10:43 AM Aug 18th from web "They serve Jim Beam on airplanes. Tastes like piss. You wouldn't be able to tell the difference, because you drink poopy. I don't."

9:23 AM Aug 17th from web "My flight lands at 9:30 on Sunday...You want to watch what? What the when I wore my first dress is mad men? I'm a mad man if you don't pick me the hell up."

2:42 PM Aug 15th from web "It's watering plants, Justin. You just take a God damned hose and you put it over the plant. You don't even pay rent, just do it. poopy."

9:56 AM Aug 14th from web (left on answering machine) "Hello? Hello? It's Sam. Anyone there? Nobody checks this god damned thing. HELLO?! HELLO?! Screw it."

Edited by TimC
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