Bill Belichick "I AM TRULY THE GREATEST"

[uglytuna 0]

AP. Foxboro - New England Patriots head coach, Bill Belicheck announced today that he guarantees a Super Bowl win on Feb 6 again after single handedly defeating the Colts by a score of 24-20. Belicheck was able to outwit and checkmate Tony Dungy on the last drive of the AFC Championship game after toying with Dungy for the first 58 minutes. With 1:30 seconds left, the Genius allowed Manning to guide his offense just past the 50 yard line. On the next play, the Brain read Dungy’s mind as Manning rolled to his right and threw the ball directly into the waiting hands of Rodney Harrison, who clutched the ball to end the drive and any hopes for the hapless Colts. A dejected Peyton Manning walked off the field in disgust, throwing his hands up in the air as if to say that he can't do everything, then he called four audibles on the way to the locker room. Peyton continues to find the Razor as his living hell.

 

Later that night an intoxicated Mike Vanderjagt was quick to point out that if it wasn’t for his 2 missed FGs and one blocked FG, a win was within reach. However, the place kicker pointed out that it was clearly a case of dumb and dumber meeting the Brain. Vanderjagt stated, “Manning is not a smart guy. We all know it. He barks a lot in the huddle and no one understands a word he is saying. In fact, I think he may be the stupidest guy in all of football. Dungy too. That guy couldn’t coach his way out of a box. He is pathetic.”

 

During his post game press conference, Belicheck was quoted as saying, "Look I make all the right decisions all year long and as long as I have graced you all with my presence.” Starting with the injuries situation…, I lose both my starting corners (Law and Poole), no problem, plug in my WR Troy Brown. I've got a LB that plays ***ing safty for crying out load. I need a TD let me plug in Mike Vrabel. Look I don't need super stars, you need me...Look Lawyer Milloy bitched and whined last year. Where are you now Lawyer??? Huh, Lawyer?? Where?! You are sitting home on your ass watching me – you pathetic twit!!!! You are nothing without me!!!!! You too Terry Glenn!!!! Bledsoe?! Hah…he was a real brain that one. Frickin pathetic!!!”

 

“Do I need to continue ?!?.......Fine! I will continue, you boring sacks of spit. This game was over before it began! I could have ordered a 63-0 destruction of that miserable Colts team with their red-neck QB running around behind his fat overrated offensive line as if he were capable of an independent thought!!! He is a mindless twit!!!! I kept the game close for TV ratings! The Commissioner wants the games close. I toyed with that weak minded Dungy and that lame ass offense all day!.......How dare to even question me!!! I am clearly the class of the league!!!!!! I don’t even have a single decent player on my roster! Rodney Harrison didn’t even know what he was doing out there in the flat before the game ending interception. I told him, Rodney, you dumb ****, go stand in the flat and Manning will throw it to you.”

 

"I know making any game decision is the correct one . After all I'm a genius? You know that. I know that. The fat putz Parcells knows that. Three years ago, I, single handedly silenced the Rams!!! That, you morons, took as a genius!!! Did you see MY winning streak of 21 games...BEEN THERE DONE THAT! - Cold weather games no problem. Overtime? no problem. Next time we are in over time just end the game and add 3 points to our score!!! I don’t even need a real team. We used 40 different players!! At one point, I had Charlie Wiess at WR!!!! That fat **** doesn’t even know how to spell Offense and you give him all the credit. Who cares if his fat ass is going to South Bend. Norte Dame will find out who the reall offense cordinator is. If Charlie has three brain cells, that would be 2 more than he uses!!! Now get this microphone out of my face. I am genius! Can you hear me?! A genius!!!!!"

 

“I will destroy everything that comes in my path!!!!! Steelers ?? Philly?? Puh-lease! I fart bigger thoughts every day than Cowher and Reid could muster in a career! I will destroy either of those teams in two weeks!!!!......and then…..then……I will show you……then……..

 

Belicheck then walked away with a sinister laugh, uttering something about taking over the world.

 

Your local reporter Ugly Tuna

[keggerz 518]

Dont you live in the PAST??? when did you start living in the future??

[Jrick35 0]

I told myself not to read this post.

 

I knew it was a mistake as I sat there waiting for it to open. And yet I read it.

 

And now my IQ has dropped 25 points.

 

And I will never get that 4 minutes of my life back either.

 

Somebody nutkick me please, the only thing more stupid than what UT wrote is that I actually read it.

 

Where's that damn brick wall at?

[keggerz 518]

UT been sniffing glue in the back of his 4th grade class again

[devilwoman 42]

 

: yeah ok...whatever :

[Easy n Dirty 0]

Forgive me for saying so, but that was actually pretty *** funny.

[Pigskin Junkie 0]

Forgive me for saying so, but that was actually pretty *** funny.

 

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Please do not encourage him?!?!?!?!

[NSab 28]

uglytuna Post 1/10/05 12:48pm

Huddler

 

 

Group: Members

Posts: 846

 

You have chosen to ignore uglytuna. View this post · Squeeze me a little harder uglytuna

[PatsFanCT 0]

Forgive me for saying so, but that was actually pretty *** funny.

 

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If it was any other poster, you'd find a lot of people agreeing with you.

 

 

Rodney Harrison didn’t even know what he was doing out there in the flat before the game ending interception. I told him, Rodney, you dumb ****, go stand in the flat and Manning will throw it to you.”

 

Come on, that was funny.

[Kid Cid 5]

This is pretty fricken funny.

[Broken 0]

 

[Skippy 5]

This is pretty fricken funny.

 

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I agree. As much as I hate to say so, it was a funny read.

[Bonehand 2]

AP. Foxboro - New England Patriots head coach, Bill Belicheck announced today that he guarantees a Super Bowl win on Feb 6 again after single handedly defeating the Colts by a score of 24-20.

 

Your local reporter Ugly Tuna

 

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The New Improved Tuna! Funny, with 20% LESS broken english!

[Hugh 0ne 30]

The New Improved Tuna! Funny, with 20% LESS broken english!

 

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He probably didn't write it. He's plaguerized stuff before.

[wiegie 18]

I opened this thread without noticing who had started it. I read the article and found it amusing--THEN I saw that Ugly-Tuna had posted it and was absolutely amazed. Not too shabby.

[keggerz 518]

I opened this thread without noticing who had started it.  I read the article and found it amusing--THEN I saw that Ugly-Tuna had posted it and was absolutely amazed.  Not too shabby.

 

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agree as far as creative license goes it was a funny read

[Balzac 36]

no way did UT write this.

[Piles 0]

 

That was freaking hilarious... I give

[BillyBalata 138]

He probably didn't write it. He's plaguerized stuff before.

 

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Actually he just copy and pasted what he plaguerized in a post this time last year.

[NSab 28]

Actually he just copy and pasted what he plaguerized in a post this time last year.

 

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He sure did

 

 

 

 

uglytuna Post 1/18/04 04:47pm

Huddler

 

 

Group: Members

Posts: 846

 

You have chosen to ignore uglytuna. View this post · Squeeze me a little harder uglytuna

[uglytuna 0]

Thank You!!!!!!!!!!

 

Ugly Tuna

[NSab 28]

Look another Chump sighting above

[devilwoman 42]

Actually he just copy and pasted what he plaguerized in a post this time last year.

 

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now thats funny...talk about some detective work...you put the ol crack in the "ugly" krackatowa

[Moss6 1]

AP. Foxboro - New England Patriots head coach, Bill Belicheck announced today that he guarantees a Super Bowl win on Feb 6 again after single handedly defeating the Colts by a score of 24-20. Belicheck was able to outwit and checkmate Tony Dungy on the last drive of the AFC Championship game after toying with Dungy for the first 58 minutes. Your local reporter Ugly Tuna

 

Then you woke up stuck to your sheets

[Grosse Pointe Gridder 0]

Then you woke up stuck to your sheets

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P-L-A-G-I-A-R-I-Z-E-D