Rectum Fire

Randy Moss has been traded...

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Loss of Moss should be Daunte's gain





Randy Moss easily is the NFL's most disruptive player. It's not even a contest. Moss can torment a team, and torture it, too. He has a knack for creating mayhem and doing damage to many teams, including his own.


The Vikings aren't trading Moss because they got a whopper of a deal from the Oakland Raiders.


Or because this is Red McCombs' parting shot and way of saying, "To heck with all you tenderfoots in Minnesota who wouldn't build me a new stadium.''


The Vikings are trading Moss simply because he wore out his welcome.


Nobody in the organization wants to talk about it publicly, but it's clear that Moss' miserable attitude is what brought about this trade. Once considered a valuable asset, he became a pain in the asset.


After a season in which he walked off the field with two seconds to play against the Washington Redskins, upsetting teammates, the decision was made that it was time for Moss to go and pollute somebody else's team chemistry.


The impulse is to say the Vikings didn't get nearly enough for Moss — linebacker Napoleon Harris, the seventh overall pick in the draft and a late-round selection.


The reality is, offers weren't flooding in and, once they decided to unload him, the Vikings took what they could get. By doing so, they ignored the wishes of owner-in-waiting Reggie Fowler, who told WCCO Radio on Sunday that he wouldn't trade Moss.


Other than the Raiders, there just wasn't much of a market for a player who admits he plays when he wants to play and doesn't care what people think, including members of his own team.


After his walk-off against the Redskins, Moss was confronted by center Matt Birk in the locker room. A few days later, Moss told ESPN he didn't care what Birk had to say and wasn't even listening to him.


Though Vikings coach Mike Tice declined to discuss the trade, which doesn't become official until March 2, he is one of the primary beneficiaries of the move. Tice no longer has to worry about coddling a volatile player who sulked if he didn't get the ball early enough in games to suit him.


Moss made it tough for Tice and, before him, Denny Green. They could flex their authority around other players but had to tiptoe around Moss because he has an almost pathological disdain for authority.


Moss is going to a team run by Al Davis, who has had authority issues of his own. (See his lawsuit against the NFL for details.) Davis also has been known for creating a haven for malcontents and players with dysfunctional personalities, but that reputation was built in the 1970s and 1980s.


Lately, the Raiders haven't been stocked with troubling players. Moss will bring an end to that, just as his behavior has brought an end to what looked as if it could someday go down as one of the best quarterback-to-receiver tandems ever. There's a tradeoff, though. While Daunte Culpepper loses the best deep threat in the history of the game, the Vikings are his team now. With Moss gone, there's nobody to undermine Culpepper's leadership.


There is likely to be an outcry from fans who don't care or understand how destructive Moss can be to a team's chemistry and care only about losing him as a pass-catching threat.


They'll get over it if the Vikings do what they haven't done with a great deal of success the past several seasons. And that's win their division and make a serious dent in the playoffs.


Such things will be more easily accomplished if Harris isn't a washout and if the Vikings use the seventh overall pick wisely, and if they sign a top free-agent receiver such as Derrick Mason or Muhsin Muhammad to replace Moss.


The shame of all this is that Moss continues to have the talent to be one of most explosive and exciting players in the game. He still would be a member of the Vikings if only he had an internal Taser that zapped him an instant before he did or said something stupid.


If only

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I could only hope that Al has some clauses in Randy's contract about his behavioral issues.


But if Moss truly comes to the Raider Nation, he will have the biggest chip on his shoulder to prove the doubters wrong. I'll bank that his playing attitude will change (for the better) due to the Vikings trading him away.


Remember how great he played his first few years when he carried the chip of being passed over in the draft?


He will be a real threat again for a couple of years until he fades back to his old antics, but a SB win is always a cure all.


I'm hoping for a Lamont Jordan or if Mr. Mary Jane decides to play football again to be the Raider starting RB. Henry is nice, but has health issues.....sorry off topic.

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Here's the flipside:



Randy is dandy for the Raiders

Scott Ostler


Thursday, February 24, 2005








Scott Ostler


Coming soon, something new and different for the Bay Area sports fan: A superstar intergalactic-traveling diva with major baggage and a radio transmitter that makes only sporadic contact with Earth.


How will we ever cope with such an exotic being?


Maybe we can refer to our notes on Rickey Henderson, Deion Sanders, Terrell Owens, Jose Canseco, Billy Martin, Reggie Jackson, Dave Kingman, Latrell Sprewell, Jerry Rice, Gilbert Arenas and Barry Bonds.


Because we learned to love those guys, in varying degrees, there's a good chance we will take a liking to Randy Moss, who appears to be headed to the Oakland Raiders, sucked westward by the gravitational pull of the Black Hole and Al Davis' hypnotic charm.


I hope the Bay Area fans and media make Moss feel at home, appreciate his quirks, grasp his greatness and forgive him his sins, because this might be God's way of saying to us, "You guys blew it big time with T.O., but I'll give you one more chance."


If we chase Moss out of town, we might be cursed with 40 years of J.J. Stokes and James Jett.


So, if Moss celebrates a Raider touchdown with a PG-rated dance move, resist the temptation to fall back on that old moral guide WWJBD -- "What would Joe Buck do?"


Moss should be as thrilled to be coming here as we should be that he is coming.


He is an artist who colors outside the lines, but since the Gold Rush days, that's the kind of person who defines the Bay Area.


Think of Moss as a beat poet with 4.2 speed.


Ah, the speed, the size, the moves and the claws. Moss is so good that he once bragged that he doesn't always play hard, but the Vikings still let him suit up every Sunday.


Moss is 28 years old, at the height of his powers. With Jerry Porter emerging as a top-line wideout, the team's future is very bright. The Raiders' offense is going to be "Porter and Moss, and just give it a toss."


For years, Al Davis has dreamed of restoring the true vertical passing game to football, and this is his chance. Maybe his last chance. If you can't go vertical with these two wideouts, you can't go vertical.


The quarterback will be a factor, of course, and that will probably be Kerry Collins, never a prolific touchdown thrower, his season high being 22. But whoever winds up quarterbacking the Raiders next year just got a lot better.


A risky move, trading for Moss? My, yes. This move could backfire worse than Davis' Hupmobile on a cold morning.


Moss grew so out of touch with his teammates in Minnesota that quarterback Daunte Culpepper said this winter, "He's my good friend, but you almost get to thinking that maybe enough is enough, and maybe the Vikings' organization has had enough."


That's staggering. The quarterback emerges as a superstar by throwing to Moss, and he claims Moss is his good friend, yet he says enough is enough? Gulp.


Moss will probably find the Bay Area, and the Raiders, more accepting of his unconventional ways. The bad conduct bar has been set fairly high in Raiderland. If you're not facing felony charges and haven't been secretly photographed in a hot tub with Victor Conte, whatever you do pretty much falls into the category of stupid frat-guy tricks.


Moss is a time bomb you hope is filled with confetti. You know he's going to do something to get your attention, besides catching footballs 14 feet above the grass. You just hope it's not something that takes all your team lawyers away from their lawsuits.


My advice to the Raiders would be to keep Moss happy and busy by throwing him a lot of balls, and by winning often, right away. No more of those two- game losing streaks that can send a high-strung wide receiver spinning off his axis.


Other than that, just appreciate Randy Moss, and hope he's worthy to some day add his name to that list at the top of this column, the strange fellows who made their teams better and made the games more fun.


Say hi to the new guy, give him some room and cut him some slack. Wide receivers are famous for their quirky self-absorption and bizarre antics, yet only one wide receiver is nicknamed The Freak, and that's Moss.


Now he's our The Freak.

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Moss made it tough for Tice and, before him, Denny Green. They could flex their authority around other players but had to tiptoe around Moss because he has an almost pathological disdain for authority.





I have to say this seems true. Moss has always struck me as a guy who is inclined to oppose any authority, whether it be righteous or's almost as if he puts so much stock in being his own man, that he'll do something he knows is wrong simply because someone asked him to do the opposite. He seemed to take enitrely too much pleasure in repeatedly claiming "I only play when I want to play," and in the fact that we wasn't even one bit contrite over walking off the field last year. He's already an all-time great WR, and he could play for my team anyday, but he just doesn't appear to be much of a human being...maybe a change of scenery will help him grow-up a bit, but I doubt it.

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I'll bank that his playing attitude will change (for the better) due to the Vikings trading him away.









I've been disappointed on that before.


I thought that he would have a great game against Seattle on National TV after he carried the traffic officer around town, but was disappointed.


I thought that he would have a great game when he was matched up against punk DBs after they've given him plenty of bulletin board material to work with, but I was wrong.


I thought that the next time he played an opponent after an embarrassing loss that he would have a hugh game, but I was wrong.


I thought that if he played against Denny Green he'd have a great game, but I was wrong.


I thought that if he played against TO in a MNF game that he'd definetly come out to play, but I was wrong.


I thought that if he played a game against an emerging rookie WR such as Roy Williams that he would be ready for action, but I was wrong.


I thought that if he played in a game with hugh playoff implications that he would break a few long tds, but I was wrong. He just went into the locker room instead.


Obviously he's had great games for the Vikes. But I guess even Randy Moss can't score on every play just because he wants to.

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I've been disappointed on that before.


Obviously he's had great games for the Vikes.  But I guess even Randy Moss can't score on every play just because he wants to.








I am excited about this deal because it's Randy Moss. He is going to bring some energy to the franchise. I mean besides his onfield presence how many people are going to want to see Randy is silver and black? I think a lot, I think he will sell some tickets.


Randy will elevate the Raiders offense into at least top 10 even if they don't do anything else. If the Raiders are able to bring in somebody to play RB ie Travis Henry, Lamont Jordan then the offense will be formidable. His contract isn't that bad either since the Raiders are only liable for the base salary of his remaining contract and the Vikings have already paid his signing bonus.


He also wasn't injury prone before last year; playing every game in his 7 years. Hopefully he goes back to that trend.



Now the negatives. There is no controlling Randy or possibly even motivating him. He will do what he wants to do. He will have to be involved early on to at least keep his mind in the game. I know people say he fits the Raider image of negativity and rebelliousness but that was a long time ago. The NFL has progressed from being able to let malcontents and troublemakers excel in the league. Referee's enforce the rules much more than in the 70's, I know it's paranoia but the Raiders image makes it that much harder for them to win games. Having Randy isn't going to help that.


I think most fans would like him on their team but you just have those nagging feelings about if he is really trying to help the team win.........

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