Perks of being over 50(or 60)

[Randall]

PERKS OF BEING OVER 50 OR 60

 

1. Kidnappers are not very interested in you.

 

2. In a hostage situation you are likely to be released first.

 

3. No one expects you to run--anywhere.

 

4. People call at 9 PM and ask, Did I wake you????

 

5. People no longer view you as a hypochondriac.

 

! 6. There is nothing left to learn the hard way.

 

7. Things you buy now won't wear out.

 

8. You can eat supper at 4 P.M .

 

9. You can live without sex but not your glasses.

 

10. You get into heated arguments about pension plans.

 

11 .. You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.

 

12. You quit trying to hold your stomach in no matter who walks into the room.

 

13. You sing along with elevator music.

 

14. Your eyes won't get much wors e.

 

15. Your investment in health insurance is finally beginning to payoff.

 

16. Your joints are more accurate meteorologists than the national weather service.

 

17. Your secrets are safe with your friends becau se they can't remember them either.

 

18. Your supply of brain cells are finally down to manageable size.

 

19. You can't remember who sent you this list .

 

 

And you notice these are all in Big Print for your con venience.

Forward this to everyone you can remember .

[Skippy]

Well, really I think that the discount for golf is probably one of the best things. When I go with a group of my older buddies I let them go in and pay.

[Chargerz]

15 is so true. When I see my doctor in the hallway now, he's afraid to ask me how I'm doin'.

[Randall]

17. Your secrets are safe with your friends becau se they can't remember them either.

[The Holy Roller]

By cracky, them are all good reasons to live long enough to collect your social security. And don't forget to take up smoking! Smoking takes years off your life but they're the last years and those years are crappy anyway. Thanks randall.