Sugar Magnolia Posted December 16, 2007 Share Posted December 16, 2007 Gages Year At A Glance-2007 Getting Old Isn’t For the Faint Of Heart Will provide some translations below for our over age 50 friends and family First colonoscopies-piece of cake-you get these wonderful drugs that give you the false perception that you are actually at a day spa, not a surgery center. Mark beats Mere-2 polyps to her 1 polyp-good news- all benign. Mere beats Mark hands down on whining about the entire process. Took advantage of a great tip from Mere’s client-take your laptop into the bathroom and watch a movie during the prep-really passes the time with ease. Mark does an endo rag doll on the fat tire (flies over the handle bars on his mtn bike ending in a major heap) while trying to bust some large air and ollie the tranny (tries to get airborne over a ditch)-takes him out of golf for two months. While trail running, Mere hits a mine (hidden object like a tree root) and falls on a lava rock, turning her knee into a softball size rainbow of colors. Learns here in Bend, when an older woman sports a knee brace and crutches, it attracts strapping tender vittles (fit young men who go after older women). Takes her out of golf for one month.-the injury does, not the tender vittles. Mark buys his first snowboard. Still a Botwoker (new boarder who can’t stay upright), Mark attempts his first ride down an intermediate slope, and biffs (wipes out). Tries to roll down the window (flailing arms wildly in a circular motion to regain balance) but bonks (to hit a hard object) a 5 year old piece of slowpo meat (someone on skis going extremely slow). Kid has a major yard sale (his equipment flies everywhere). Kid screams bloody murder and Daddy goes kookoo (crazy) on Mark and threatens to sue. Turns out Kyle was completely unharmed, and later sends Mark a nice note on how helpful and caring he was, and no letters from the lawyers. We discover the miracle drug, ibuprofen. Never leave home without it. With less back pain, Mere is now driving the ball 20 yards further. Just in time-she was close to taking the boring plunge into YOGA. Turned in the water bed for an orthopedic bed. Mark is now a member of AARP. With membership you get free drinks with your meals at Taco Bell. Check out the monthly AARP magazine-great tips like “build your nest egg by not spending your evenings at the mall” Did you know all the low priced items at your local grocer are on the bottom shelves? Did you know Caroline Kennedy and Kevin Costner just turned 50? If you are a senior you just can’t be without this magazine. Mark gets pulled over by Oregon State Police for going too slow on hwy 97 in his Z3! Might be time for a Buick Regal. Did beat the rap in court. Mere hits the big 5-0 this coming February and 10 gray hairs, new appearance of wrinkles, and love handles to show for it. Words of Wisdom: Don’t get your eye exam done by an optometrist who sets up shop in the back corner of a Costco store. Hope you have a wonderful holiday season. Meredith and Mark Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kid Cid Posted December 17, 2007 Share Posted December 17, 2007 I love the fact that you guys still play like you're 20. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hugh 0ne Posted December 17, 2007 Share Posted December 17, 2007 Good stuff. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Azazello1313 Posted December 17, 2007 Share Posted December 17, 2007 funny stuff happy holidays to you and yours as well. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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