Coffeeman Posted July 26, 2007 Share Posted July 26, 2007 anyway, this whole question is kinda dumb...why would ANY heterosexual guy voluntarily spend all of his FREE time with a single, attractive woman if he's not either hitting it or trying to? Agreed - I wouldn't count work as 'free time', so I'm not sure when all this time occurs. If you're both single, why not go for it? But if its some kinda hobby, and the guy is married, I'd suggest he find another place or person with which to spend so much time - to avoid the temptation. Unless the guy wants to cheat on his wife..... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skylive5 Posted July 26, 2007 Share Posted July 26, 2007 (edited) Can a guy spend all of his free time(30-40 hours per week) with a single, fairly attractive woman without thinking about mating with her? This is what is so interesting about this place. The above question is asked. Answers are based on that question. And the answer is... yes he can. It is funny to watch the imagination run wild building all different types of scenarios. I thought I would add a little detail to the question. My female friend is recently divorced. She is one of the sweetest human beings I have ever been around. She has three boys 3,8, and 15. Her husband recently left her for strange and quit his $50k job and moved to Illinois with strange to smoke crack. He has paid her zero child support (she is a school teacher) and does not intend to even if she could find him. She is totally brokenhearted and the whole thing is making everyone around her upset. She teaches Sunday school with my wife and is one of the wife's best friends. She is 35 years old.. In comes a (yankee) visitor to church one sunday. He is in town on a temporary assignment at the local army base. He is a decent enough guy but it is obvious he has has a VERY sheltered life. He is 25 and just out of college. He actually gets his MBA this weekend. Well he becomes friend with recently divorced chick. They are together ALL of the time. No joke, as far as I know ALL of their free time is spent together. You literally do not see one without the other. Now I am as sure as I am fat that there is no official relationship going on there. They just like to hang out together. My belief is, no chick in as vulnerable a state as she is in can hang out with a guy a decent as him and not have strong feelings about it. I also believe no 25 y/o guy can hang out that much with a 35 y/o attractive chick without thinking about it. I believe these two are in love and in denial about it. I have seen this kind of thing before. The hang up is that he leaves for a transfer in Washington DC in about 3 weeks. Most of my friends at church believe I am way off base here. I believe they are very naive. Then, after much posting and discussion, the full question and scenario is posted. Now everything has changed and the original question really doesn't have anything to do with the info wanted. *sigh* All I have to say is... good luck with your counseling session this evening. And keep in mind... the person that gives the advice is the person blamed. I would stay away from advice. Edited July 26, 2007 by skylive5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
polksalet Posted July 26, 2007 Author Share Posted July 26, 2007 This is what is so interesting about this place. The above question is asked. Answers are based on that question. And the answer is... yes he can.Then, after much posting and discussion, the full question and scenario is posted. Now everything has changed and the original question really doesn't have anything to do with the info wanted. *sigh* All I have to say is... good luck with your counseling session this evening. And keep in mind... the person that gives the advice is the person blamed. I would stay away from advice. I actually do a lot of counseling. Scary ain't it? As you might have noticed, my self image and value is not dependent on people liking me. My wife thinks I am a sociopath. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
polksalet Posted July 26, 2007 Author Share Posted July 26, 2007 Sky, the reason I axed was cause my wife thinks I am wrong about guys. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skylive5 Posted July 26, 2007 Share Posted July 26, 2007 My wife thinks I am a sociopath. I'm goin' with the wife on this one. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skylive5 Posted July 26, 2007 Share Posted July 26, 2007 Sky, the reason I axed was cause my wife thinks I am wrong about guys. She's right on this one too. Two for two...she's on a roll. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
polksalet Posted July 26, 2007 Author Share Posted July 26, 2007 Yes, but as the end of the day I am still male. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gonkis Posted July 26, 2007 Share Posted July 26, 2007 Yes, but as the end of the day I am still male. on the same day you post a picture of yourself in white knee high boots! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
polksalet Posted July 26, 2007 Author Share Posted July 26, 2007 on the same day you post a picture of yourself in white knee high boots! hawt BAYYBEEEEEEE Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hat Trick Posted July 26, 2007 Share Posted July 26, 2007 When me and the wife started dating, I never considered that she would be a good mother. I never considered she would be a good cook. I never considered if she would be a good home maker. I never considered if she was good at ironing pants. I never considered whether or not she was frugal. I never considered if she would be a good wife. The only thing I was really thinking about when I asked my wife out the first time was "I wonder how long it is going to take me to tag this." We've been together for 11 years now, and I'm very thankful for all the things that I never considered, and for having her in my life. I'd never cheat on my wife, but to say that I've never entertained fantasies with attractive women I'm around a lot would just be a lie. It is on thing to think about it, and truthfully it is probably healthy to do so just as long as you don't say the other womans name when you are having sex with your wife. As long as it remains in your head, and not in bed, there is nothing wrong with it. This is pretty much my view as well. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skylive5 Posted July 26, 2007 Share Posted July 26, 2007 When me and the wife started dating, I never considered that she would be a good mother. I never considered she would be a good cook. I never considered if she would be a good home maker. I never considered if she was good at ironing pants. I never considered whether or not she was frugal. I never considered if she would be a good wife. The only thing I was really thinking about when I asked my wife out the first time was "I wonder how long it is going to take me to tag this." We've been together for 11 years now, and I'm very thankful for all the things that I never considered, and for having her in my life. I'd never cheat on my wife, but to say that I've never entertained fantasies with attractive women I'm around a lot would just be a lie. It is on thing to think about it, and truthfully it is probably healthy to do so just as long as you don't say the other womans name when you are having sex with your wife. As long as it remains in your head, and not in bed, there is nothing wrong with it. And I imagine this is the way of the world with most. However, not with me and that is where I come from when I answer these sort of things...and I know that I can't be the only one in the whole wide wide world of sports that thinks like I do. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TDFFFreak Posted July 26, 2007 Share Posted July 26, 2007 (edited) When me and the wife started dating, I never considered that she would be a good mother. I never considered she would be a good cook. I never considered if she would be a good home maker. I never considered if she was good at ironing pants. I never considered whether or not she was frugal. I never considered if she would be a good wife. The only thing I was really thinking about when I asked my wife out the first time was "I wonder how long it is going to take me to tag this." We've been together for 11 years now, and I'm very thankful for all the things that I never considered, and for having her in my life. I'd never cheat on my wife, but to say that I've never entertained fantasies with attractive women I'm around a lot would just be a lie. It is on thing to think about it, and truthfully it is probably healthy to do so just as long as you don't say the other womans name when you are having sex with your wife. As long as it remains in your head, and not in bed, there is nothing wrong with it. I can vouch from a psychological standpoint, this is absolutley true. Men and women need their fantasies, it is simply a matter of where you regulate those fantasies to. In your head, great. Act them out with another woman, unless you and your wife have a spoken arrangement, not so good. Edited July 26, 2007 by TDFFFreak Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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