28 People You Meet at a Urinal

[Big Country]

1. EXCITABLE:Shorts half twisted around, cannot find hole, rips shorts.

2. SOCIABLE:Joins friends in piss whether he has to or not.

3. NOSEY:Looks into next urinal to see how the other guy is fixed.

4. TIMID:Cannot piss if someone is watching, flushes urinal as if he had already, comes back later.

5. INDIFFERENT:All urinals being used, pisses in the sink.

6. CLEVER:No hands, fixes tie, looks around and usually pisses on the floor.

7. WORRIED:Not sure of where he has been lately, makes quick inspection.

8. FRIVOLOUS:Plays stream up, down and across urinals, tries to hit fly or bug.

9. ABSENT-MINDED:Opens vest, pulls out tie, pisses in pants.

10. CHILDISH:Pisses directly into bottom of urinal, likes to see the bubbles.

11. SNEAKY:Farts silently while pissing, acts very innocent, knows man in the next stall will get blamed.

12. PATIENT:Stands very close for a long time, reads newspaper with free hand.

13. DESPARATE:Waits in long line, teeth floating, pisses in pants.

14. TOUGH:Bangs dick on side of urinal to dry it.

15. EFFICIENT:Waits until he has to crap, then does both.

16. FAT:Backs up and takes a blind shot at urinal, pisses in shoes.

17. LITTLE:Stands on box, falls in, drowns.

18. DRUNK:Holds left thumb in right hand, pisses in pants.

19. DISGRUNTLED:Stands for a while, gives up, walks away.

20. CONCEITED:Holds two inch dick like a baseball bat.

21. IMPATIENT:Always in a hurry, pisses down back of guy using urinal in front of him.

22. HUNTER:Gets out of camper, unzips fly, steps of cliff, never pisses, but does scare the #### out of himself.

23. WITHDRAWN:Places feet in urinal, pisses down leg, thus eliminate noise.

24. CROSS-EYED:Looks into urinal to the left, pisses into one in the center, flushes one on the right.

25. CURIOUS:Looks over at neighbor, pisses in neighbor's pocket.

26. COMPETITIVE:Stands back, and challenges others to distance contest.

27. SHOW OFF:Stands with back to urinal, and slings tool over shoulder.

28. CONFUSED:Woman in wrong washroom wondering what's with the funny sinks.

[slambo]

29: BLATANT: Executive director with major comb-over steps to urinal starts to piss and rips a hugh fart. Employee at adjacent urinal feels obligated to make the comment... "Nice one". ( what was I thinking )