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i found this one funny ...


Recent letter to the U.S. Passport Office.


Dear Sirs,


I'm in the process of renewing my passport, and still cannot believe this.

How is it that Radio Shack has my address and telephone number and knows

that I bought a cable t.v. from them back in 1987, and yet, the Federal

Government is still asking me where I was born and on what date.

For Christ sakes, do you guys do this by hand? My birth date you have on my

social security card, and it is on all the income tax forms I've filed for

the past 30 years. It is on my health insurance card, my driver's license,

on the last eight damn passports I've had, on all those stupid customs

declaration forms I've had to fill out before being allowed off the plane

over the last 30 years, and all those insufferable census forms that are

done at election times.


Would somebody please take note, once and for all, that my mother's name is

Maryanne, my father's name is Robert and I'd be absolutely astounded if that

ever changed between now and when I die!!!!!!

I apologize, I'm really pissed off this morning. Between you an' me, I've

had enough of this bull----! You send the application to my house, then you

ask me for my f------ address.


What is going on? You have a gang of Neanderthal ---holes workin' there!

Look at my damn picture. Do I look like Bin Laden? I don't want to dig up

Yasser Arafat, for s--- sakes. I just want to go and park my ass on a sandy

beach. And would someone please tell me, why would you give a s---- whether

I plan on visiting a farm in the next 15 days? If I ever got the urge to do

something weird to a chicken or a goat, believe you me, I'd sure as hell not

want to tell anyone!


Well, I have to go now, 'cause I have to go to the other end of the city and

get another f------ copy of my birth certificate, to the tune of $60. Would

it be so complicated to have all the services in the same spot to assist in

the issuance of a new passport the same day?? Nooooo, that'd be to damn

easy and maybe makes sense. You'd rather have us running all over the

f------ place like chickens with our heads cut off, then find some ---hole

to confirm that it's really me on the damn picture - you know,the one where

we're not allowed to smile?! (bureaucratic f------ morons) Hey, you know why


we can't smile? We're totally pissed off!



- An Irate Citizen.


P.S. Remember what I said above about the picture and getting someone to

confirm that it's me? Well, my family has been in this country since 1776

........I have served in the military for something over 30 years and have

had security clearances up the ying yang........However, I have to get

someone 'important' to verify who I am - you know, someone like my doctor WHO




You Sure In The Hell Should Know Who.

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