How do you help someone stop being a screw up?

[i_am_the_swammi]

Keep her away from this guy?

 

[TimC]

If you thought of this person as a sister, what type of advice would you give?

 

I have an older sister and a younger sister that know nothing of financial responsibility. They never have and I doubt ever will. Both take and take everything around them for granted. If I won a million dollars and gave them each $500,000, they would be upset it wasn't more and they'd be broke within 6 months and not understand why I couldn't give them more. I've learned through the years to never discuss or interact with them on a financial level in any form.

 

Neither has held down a permanent job for basically their entire life. One married money and they are deep in debt now. The other married a bigger loser and they sponge off my parents like crazy. Neither cares about the money they receive. Only that they receive it. You are making the same mistake we make to the Iraqis and Afghanistanis. You are placing your moral values on this person. You cannot do that. They do not share in the thought process that money is earned and must be cared for like you probably do. They do not want a hand-up...only a hand-out. When they have exhausted you, they will move on to the next person without remorse for the position they have put you in.

 

You need to run as quickly as possible. She will only drag you down to her level. Of course, she may be the one-in-a-million person that will change her life, but it's not worth the risk to you or your family.

 

Also, to the poster whose company has helped financially, you need to report that money as income to them or you are committing tax fraud. Also, if you are a publicly traded company, you may be providing an unsecured loan to an employee, which may be illegal.

[Atlanta Cracker]

They do not want a hand-up...only a hand-out. When they have exhausted you, they will move on to the next person without remorse for the position they have put you in.

 

You need to run as quickly as possible. She will only drag you down to her level. Of course, she may be the one-in-a-million person that will change her life, but it's not worth the risk to you or your family.

 

She hasn't asked me or anyone for money and is vowing not to and complains how her siblings have always milked her parents for money they can't afford to give. She is basically living on her own right now for the first time in quite a while and doing a poor job of maintaining a budget though she is trying to turn things around.

 

There is no risk to me or my family for offering advice.