SEC=UGA Posted June 14, 2011 Share Posted June 14, 2011 Has feminism and the women's liberation movement had a negative impact on "traditional" male/female relationship and gender roles? Anthony Weiner's front-page scandal has yet again raised the question, "What's the matter with men today?" Certainly in the majority of the political sex scandals we have witnessed in the last few years -- Bill Clinton's, John Edwards's, Eliot Spitzer's, David Vitter's, and Arnold Schwarzenegger's, to name a few of the more vulgar examples -- the blame falls largely on the man. It's hard to ignore the fact that many of these members of the political elite have used their positions of power to take advantage of young, or largely defenseless, women. Some observers have offered a "boys will be boys" explanation, suggesting that cheating is just something men have always done. It's true that many of these men seem to think sexual improprieties are part of their job description -- and as political leaders they have no shortage of opportunities to act on their desires. Still, we've been much too quick to ignore the role that women -- and modern feminism -- have played in setting the stage for many of these infidelities. This is not a gratuitous attack on the women who have been publicly humiliated by these scandals and bear the emotional brunt of their husbands' unfaithfulness; rather, it is to point out that for every disloyal and lewd male lawmaker, there's a woman (or two, or three, or more) who is all too willing to enable his behavior. More important, more and more men -- and women -- have forgotten what a healthy relationship (let alone marriage) looks like. For decades, modern feminists have undermined the idea of marriage, discouraged romance and courtship, encouraged a laissez-faire sexual culture, and done everything in their power to eliminate gender roles. Add to this the academic and professional opportunities available to women today, and the access to affordable birth control, and it's clear that it's much easier for women to participate in our "no strings attached" sexual culture than ever before. But this freedom, which has benefitted women so much, doesn't come without consequences -- namely, that it has allowed so many women to think it's permissible to have an affair with a married man. It was simply a coincidence that in the midst of the Anthony Weiner scandal, my husband and I watched the recent romantic comedy Just Go with It, in which Adam Sandler plays a plastic surgeon who pretends to be married in order to pick up women. Sounds counterintuitive, perhaps, but hilarity ensues as Sandler dons a fake wedding ring, tells sob stories about his terrible wife, and quickly receives sympathy and affection from a host of young women eager to cheer him up. Ultimately, Sandler's character meets an ever-so-slightly more traditional woman whom he thinks he loves, and who wants him to demonstrate that he's not, in fact, married. Still, she is the anomaly, following scores of women who show no compunctions about sleeping with a man who claims his marriage is slipping away, but shows no signs of starting divorce proceedings and continues to wear his wedding band. One shouldn't make too much out of a Sandler comedy, but it draws attention to some serious flaws in the way society views marriage -- and women -- today. In our effort to bring about gender equality, we've lost sight of important differences between the sexes. And when it comes to relationships, the attitude that a girl should act like "one of the guys" has serious ramifications that often end up hurting other women most of all. I don't pretend to know anything about Weiner's marriage, nor do I wish to set myself up as a judge of morality. Still, every time a new sex scandal emerges, it's clear that Americans are not simply caught up in the sordid details, but are at some level troubled by what are usually pretty awful situations. It's hard to imagine that most women don't have at least a fleeting thought of what it would be like to be in the wife's shoes. (In fact, Hollywood has created an entire network television show based on this very premise, The Good Wife.) Left out of the conversation, however, is a discussion about why so many women are willing to participate in these infidelities. If, as a society, we're interested in seeing fewer sexual scandals, we need to ask more than what's wrong with men today. Only when we consider how decades of skewed gender politics and a quest for a false sense of "equality" have contributed to this culture will we be able to have an honest conversation. Bio: Sabrina L. Schaeffer is a senior fellow with the Independent Women's Forum and managing partner of Evolving Strategies. The opinions expressed in this commentary are solely those of the author. Read more: http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2011/06/14/...l#ixzz1PHRf7yms Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
detlef Posted June 14, 2011 Share Posted June 14, 2011 Seems like a pretty thin argument. I mean, look no further than the "evidence", a freaking Adam Sandler Rom-com. How are we to know whether or not these high profile cases are merely a result in the fact that the news is everywhere now, so it's just harder to get away with things. And further, does the fact that a bunch of power-hungry dudes can't keep their junk in their pants mean that men, in general, are having as much trouble? Further, modern society doesn't need marriage as much as it used to. We don't need to partner up and share the load like we used to because our home lives are not as work-oriented. We get home and watch TV. Maybe you've got to mow the lawn on the weekends, but there's not crops to tend to and what not. So both men a women technically "need" each other less than they used to. So it's natural that both sides would take a less serious stance on the notion of marriage. Not everyone, of course, but plenty. Hell, sometimes I think the fact that my wife and I have somewhat of a small urban farm helps bind us because we do call on some of the traditional "partnership" needs of marriage. Time at home is filled with chores. They're chores that we enjoy, but it's still "stuff that needs doing". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Yukon Cornelius Posted June 14, 2011 Share Posted June 14, 2011 peoples been banging since Adam and Eve Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SEC=UGA Posted June 14, 2011 Author Share Posted June 14, 2011 peoples been banging since Adam and Eve Who? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Azazello1313 Posted June 14, 2011 Share Posted June 14, 2011 meh, there have always been women willing to get split by powerful men. I am as weary of feminist pap as the next guy, but it's tough for me to see laying that one on their doorstep. to me, the more interesting take is to view these charismatic narcissists through the lens of the will to power over others. lord acton said that power corrupts, and absolute power corrupts absolutely. he also said that great men are almost always bad men. I don't think he JUST meant that power tends to be used in evil ways...I think he also meant that power assaults the moral compass of its wielders, making them feel superior, above traditional mores. and it draws in people who value it above other considerations. the "ruling class" in our culture are almost invariably scum. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
untateve Posted June 14, 2011 Share Posted June 14, 2011 women dig power...women really dig confidence in a man. put the two together... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
delusions of grandeur Posted June 14, 2011 Share Posted June 14, 2011 (edited) So Marilyn Monroe was a feminist? Na, not buying it. I agree with the above that women are drawn to men in power, and men are drawn to, well, beautiful women. Feminism would actually seem to stand in the way of that behavior, as it could be seen as objectification that only reinforces their traditional gender roles... However, neo-feminism, which centers around empowerment through things like sexual liberation (some even see strippers as representing that empowerment over men), might be where it could insight them to use their sexuality to get ahead in life... But I really don't think that's what's going on with politicians and their mistresses. For example, in a google search I found at least 5 presidents before the feminist movements who are believed to have had affairs, and if we had a mass-media and incentives like book deals to come forward, there would probably be far more of these that we find out about from back then. Hell, just look at the history of English kings that's riddled with mistresses ... I don't think the movement has changed anything besides easier access to cute female interns However, if you're trying to take this discussion further into how it affects our daily lives, then I love the feminist movement. Thanks to them, I might actually get to live out my dream of being a house-husband some day Edited June 14, 2011 by delusions of granduer Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Yukon Cornelius Posted June 15, 2011 Share Posted June 15, 2011 However, if you're trying to take this discussion further into how it affects our daily lives, then I love the feminist movement. Thanks to them, I might actually get to live out my dream of being a house-husband some day shoot ,house males have been around for centuries, they are called eunuchs. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Azazello1313 Posted June 16, 2011 Share Posted June 16, 2011 NOW we're talking... Earlier this month, a controversial new club launched in Malaysia. Dubbed The Obedient Wives Club, the 800 or so members are certain that they've found the key to a long and happy marriage: Obey your husband without question, and cater to his every sexual whim. "Disobedient wives are the cause for upheaval in this world," the club's vice president and co-founder, Dr. Rohayah Mohamad, told told the Associated Press. She blames the country's rising divorce rate—as well as incidents of prostitution, rape, and even incest—on wives who have neglected to keep their husbands satisfied in bed. "When husbands come home, wives do not welcome their husbands with warm alluring smiles and sexy dressing ... That is the reality today," she said. "A good wife is a good sex worker to her husband." where do I send my dues? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Clubfoothead Posted June 16, 2011 Share Posted June 16, 2011 NOW we're talking... where do I send my dues? For an obedient Malasian you should probably make the check payable to allah. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TimC Posted June 16, 2011 Share Posted June 16, 2011 women dig power...women really dig confidence in a man. put the two together... She ends up wearing the strap-on? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BeeR Posted June 17, 2011 Share Posted June 17, 2011 modern society doesn't need marriage as much as it used to. Disagree. Modern society needs marriage (ie "real" marriage, not the irresponsible/casual type as discussed in the OP) more than ever, just not for the practical reasons you stated. The "family unit" (even if it's just a couple w/o kids) is an inherent human need and extremely important to all of us with rare exception at most, whether we care to admit it (to others or even ourselves) or not. Yeah, I know you CAN have have a permanent, rock-solid relationship w/o getting married, but w/o marriage, one's odds go way down as it's much easier to cut and run. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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