Sean Taylor avoids DUI charge

[Glabra]

Redskins Safety Sean Taylor had his DUI charge dismissed late last week in Virginia. The judge, Mitchell Mutnick, kicked the case after he watched a video tape of Taylor performing various field sobriety tests.

 

Judge Mutnick said, “I’ve seen a whole lot worse. I don’t think the evidence was sufficient.”

 

That’s your reasoning, you’ve seen worse? Nice judge! Taylor performed most of the tasks given to him well, with one exception…reciting the alphabet.

 

He seemed to have a little trouble with the letters j, m, and n. You heard me right! He missed the letters j, m and n. His lawyer Warren McClain says that isn’t a big deal. “The alphabet test, to me, is kind of confusing. I don’t think anyone has asked Mr. Taylor to say the alphabet since the fourth grade.”

 

I’m sorry, what did you just say? Did you just try and tell me that the alphabet was ‘confusing’? I’m pretty sure that’s what you said…I just wanted to make sure. How in the world is the alphabet confusing. It isn’t like they change the answers all the time. It isn’t like there is a trick to reciting the alphabet. The letters have been in the same order for quite some time now. The alphabet is confusing. Good thing they didn’t ask him to do something really confusing like read.

 

Look, I know that these guys aren’t all Rhodes Scholars. I know that these guys aren’t settling in with the great classics of literature when they have some down time around the house. I don’t expect them to be able to do the New York Times crossword puzzle in ink, but I don’t think that it is too much to ask that they actually recite the alphabet without missing 3 letters.

[Pope Flick]

Look, I know that these guys aren’t all Rhodes Scholars. I know that these guys aren’t settling in with the great classics of literature when they have some down time around the house. I don’t expect them to be able to do the New York Times crossword puzzle in ink, but I don’t think that it is too much to ask that they actually recite the alphabet without missing 3 letters.

 

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Umm, not that I'm an expert, but the 'alphabet test' involves reciting it backwards Z to A.

 

Try it sober.

[Bill Swerski]

Yep, I remember that from driver's ed in high school. Always refuse to recite the alphabet backwards. Only a drunk would try.

[General Itals]

I would think that the "I'm from the University of Miami. I don't know my alphabet" defense is a perfectly reasonable excuse for failing that test.

Edited January 11, 2005 by General Itals

[rajncajn]

I almost got hauled in one night because I couldn't stand on one leg with my arms out, tilt my head back & touch my nose with my eyes closed. I kept falling over. I also "failed" the reverse alphabet test as well. Finally when I told the cop to just forget all the shenanigans and just give me the stupid breath test they let me go.

 

Point is, most people "fail" field sobriety tests. It's not about whether you can actually perform them or not it's how you handle & react to them & it give the cops an excuse to give you a breathalizer (which is your choice) or bring you in.

[pork chop express]

I would think that the "I'm from the University of Miami.  I don't know my alphabet" defense is a perfectly reasonable excuse for failing that test.

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I thought his lawyer used the Chubaka Defense.

[DemonKnight]

The only reason they give a field sobriety test is so that 15 mins elapse before they give you the breathalyzer. The thinking is that if you had a drink right before they pulled you from your car and they administered the brethalyzer right then it would skew the test results from alcohol lingering in your mouth rather than on your breath. Being from VA and having this test administered to me at least 3 times ive become pretty familiar. Its real easy to get a DUI in VA.... I think the test is to count backward between a random set of letters like L to J. Just take a second to think about it and it really is easy.