The Ten Dollar Bet

[spain]

A guy walks into a bar, sits down, and notices a very large jar on the

counter. He sees it's filled to the brim with $10 bills. He guesses

there must be thousands of dollars in it. His curiosity was too great,

so he approaches the bartender and asks, "What's up with the jar?"

 

"Well, you pay ten dollars, and if you pass three tests, you get all the

money."

 

The man certainly isn't going to pass this up. "What are the three

tests?"

 

"Pay first, those are the rules." says the bartender. So the man gives

him the tenner, and the bartender drops it into the jar. "OK," the

bartender says, "here's what you need to do. First you have to drink

that entire gallon of pepper tequila... the whole thing, all at once...

and you can't make a face while doing it. Second, there's a pit bull

chained-up out back with a sore tooth. You have to remove the tooth with

your bare hands. Third, there's a 90-year-old

woman upstairs who has

never reached orgasm during intercourse. You've gotta make things right

for her."

 

The man is stunned. "I know I paid my 10 dollars , but I'm not an idiot!

 

I won't do it! You have to be nuts to drink a gallon of pepper tequila,

and then do those other things...."

 

"Your call," says the bartender, "but your money stays where it is."

 

As time goes on and the man has a few drinks, then a few more, he asks,

"Wherez zat teeqeelah?" He grabs the gallon with both hands and downs it

with a big slurp. Tears are streaming down both cheeks, but he doesn't

make a face. Next, he staggers out back where the pit bull is

chained-up, and soon all the people inside the bar hear a huge, noisy,

scuffle going on outside. They hear the pit bull barking, the guy

screaming, the pit bull yelping, and then... silence.

 

Just when they think the man surely must be dead, he staggers back into

the bar, with his shirt ripped

and large bloody scratches all over his

body.

 

"Now," he says, "where's the old woman with the sore tooth?

[Guest Sores]

[yo mama]

A guy walks into a bar, sits down, and notices a very large jar on the

counter. He sees it's filled to the brim with $10 bills. He guesses

there must be thousands of dollars in it. His curiosity was too great,

so he approaches the bartender and asks, "What's up with the jar?"

 

"Well, you pay ten dollars, and if you pass three tests, you get all the

money."

 

The man certainly isn't going to pass this up. "What are the three

tests?"

 

"Pay first, those are the rules." says the bartender. So the man gives

him the tenner, and the bartender drops it into the jar. "OK," the

bartender says, "here's what you need to do. First you have to drink

that entire gallon of pepper tequila... the whole thing, all at once...

and you can't make a face while doing it. Second, there's a pit bull

chained-up out back with a sore tooth. You have to remove the tooth with

your bare hands. Third, there's a 90-year-old

woman upstairs who has

never reached orgasm during intercourse. You've gotta make things right

for her."

 

The man is stunned. "I know I paid my 10 dollars , but I'm not an idiot!

 

I won't do it! You have to be nuts to drink a gallon of pepper tequila,

and then do those other things...."

 

"Your call," says the bartender, "but your money stays where it is."

 

As time goes on and the man has a few drinks, then a few more, he asks,

"Wherez zat teeqeelah?" He grabs the gallon with both hands and downs it

with a big slurp. Tears are streaming down both cheeks, but he doesn't

make a face. Next, he staggers out back where the pit bull is

chained-up, and soon all the people inside the bar hear a huge, noisy,

scuffle going on outside. They hear the pit bull barking, the guy

screaming, the pit bull yelping, and then... silence.

 

Just when they think the man surely must be dead, he staggers back into

the bar, with his shirt ripped

and large bloody scratches all over his

body.

 

"Now," he says, "where's the old woman with the sore tooth?

 

1310219[/snapback]

 

 

 

An oldy, but a goodie.

[darin3]

Another good bar-related joke:

 

Man sits down at the bar, and after a few drinks and chatting with the bartender, says to the bartender "hey buddy... I bet you $100 I can stand up on my barstool and piss into this empty pint glass and not miss... not one drop...". The bartender chuckles, but considers it, as it sounds like a near shoo-in for a cool $100. So he accepts, and the guy gets up on the barstool and unzips. And then he starts pissing. All over the bar. All over the bottles, everywhere. The guy hasn't even hit the pint glass. The bartender doesn't know whether to get mad or just laugh at the guy... but since he's gonna be making an easy $100, he just laughs and starts cleaning up the piss. Guy gets off the barstool and says "jeez, guess I owe you $100... hold on". He goes to the back of the bar where a couple guys are playing pool and comes back with a fistful of cash. "Sorry", says the pisser, "here's your $100... I bet those dudes in the back $1,000 that I could stand on my barstool and piss all over your bar and all you'd do is laugh".