Kids hitting other kids

[whomper]

The other alternative, when you aren't around, is make it clear that your wife must be in the same room as the children.

The kid is just doing it because he can get away with it. One punch and it's over.

 

 

Yeah..true..But it sort of sucks to have to do that..When adults get together with other adults and both have kids its fun to let the kids play and occupy themselves while you hang with the other adults and talk ..You are always listening in and at an arms distance and periodically check in but not usually sitting right there. Given this situation though you really need to be in the room with this kid if you want to make sure no bullchit is going on..Its a beat situation because as much as the mom has her ways the 4 adults usually have fun together..But thats not gonna continue unless this situation gets straightened out

Edited September 28, 2007 by whomper

[untateve]

The thing is, dad won't always be able to keep her out of harms way and sometimes she needs to know how to retaliate. I'm not by any means suggesting this should be the standard way of dealing with things and it sounds like Whomp has a good feel that his daughter is clear on that too but sometimes you have to dispense with the diplomacy and take action.

 

A simple punch of this brat ends all the problems, the parents can be friends and hang out again, and there is no need for endless debate or discussion.

 

My son is 2 so this issue hasn't arisen yet and he isn't allowed to hit. Timeout works great for him and he has never been spanked. I do, fully expcet to teach him one day when to defend himself and this would be one of those cases where it would be time.

 

And a 4-yr-old can discern when to hit and when not to? Again, I offer up the martial arts option.

[Hitman]

Lots of great advice in this thread. Whomp, you handled this very well. I have a 7 yr. old daughter who has fortunately never faced this problem. Some kids have a harder time dealing with this type of aggressive behavior from another kid, depending on their own nature. I know she would likely not retaliate right away, but I give full permission to my kids to defend themselves when necessary, and NEVER let ANYONE invade on their personal space, hitting or touching them in any way. The last resort is hitting back, but hopefully they will when it is absolutely necessary. It is surely a bit different to handle with girls than a boy IMO. My soon to be 3 year old son already throws nice 3 punch combinations.

Edited September 29, 2007 by Hitman

[Atlanta Cracker]

And a 4-yr-old can discern when to hit and when not to? Again, I offer up the martial arts option.

 

 

I think so, and especially when the parents are heavily involved in the decison. Martial arts is fine as well but this isn't a case of the 4 year old lacking confidence, its more about just receiving the go ahead to defend herself.

[untateve]

I think so, and especially when the parents are heavily involved in the decison. Martial arts is fine as well but this isn't a case of the 4 year old lacking confidence, its more about just receiving the go ahead to defend herself.

 

We disagree then.

 

Also, martial arts, when taught correctly, teaches that physical aggresion is used as a last resort.

 

Finally, shouldn't you be going to sleep so you'll be fresh and rested for your party?

[REZ]

My kids have never been the hitter until this last one. All the older siblings play rough with him and he plays rough with the kids at the daycare. We've talked to him and put him in timeout for it. What's worked for him is to get the older kids to stop playing rough.

It's not good when your kid does something and then looks at you and says "I go timeout"

 

I had a problem when my oldest was in 1st grade. A 5th grade boy punched him on the school bus. He got suspended from the bus for 1 week. First day back, punched my kid in the nose again. Got suspended two weeks. 2nd day back, punched my kid in the nose.

I visited the dad who I knew just from the neigborhood, enough to nod at. Let him know that the next time his kid punched mine in the nose, I would repay the favor to him.

Solved the problem.