Perchoutofwater Posted March 23, 2011 Share Posted March 23, 2011 She was so tight, it was like trying to stuff a marshmallow in a piggy bank. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Choppy Posted March 23, 2011 Share Posted March 23, 2011 Whenever I'd come up with a really bad idea my dad used to say "That's gonna work about as well as a screen door on a submarine". Heard that one a lot back in the day. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scooby Posted March 23, 2011 Author Share Posted March 23, 2011 growing up in south county (southern Anne Arundell County) I've heard a ton that have stuck with me over the years. When we moved from south county into PG county, my best friend's dad was a Vietnam vet and his whole bike club hung out at their house all the time so I picked up a bunch from them guys as well. All and all, they all sound redneckish. I had to call the wife and a few friends to remember some of these... It's raining harder than a Bull pissing on a flat rock Don't let the door hit ya where the good lord split ya I'm happier than a tornado in a trailer park He thinks the sun comes up just to hear him crow I'm as mad as a mule chewing on bumblebees He/She/It is about as useful as a back pocket on a T-shirt Colder than a witches titty--in a brass bra or hotter than 3 rats eff'in in a wool sock Better pack your lunch and bring a flashlight Dummer than a box of rocks/doorknobs/coal Harder than pushing a greased string up a turtle's arsse Queerer than a 3 dollar bill He/She/You/Me will worry the horns off of a goat Don't throw the baby out with the bath water He/She is about as useful as a soup sandwich They looked like a couple of monkeys banging a doorknob (personal favorite) Fish and guest stink after 3 days Can't get blood from a rock Can't polish a turd "x" is harder than a preacher's pecker Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Square Posted March 23, 2011 Share Posted March 23, 2011 Sounds like they all speak "Larry the cable guy" down thar. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CowboysDiehard Posted March 23, 2011 Share Posted March 23, 2011 Sounds like they all speak "Larry the cable guy" down thar. I say that boy Square is about as sharp as a bowlin' ball! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JoJoTheWebToedBoy Posted March 24, 2011 Share Posted March 24, 2011 (edited) Madder then a wet setting hen Sh!ting in High Cotton and wiping my ass on the leaves No skin off my nose Like water off a duck's back Like sh!t thru a goose Edited March 24, 2011 by JoJoTheWebToedBoy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scooby's Hubby Posted March 24, 2011 Share Posted March 24, 2011 "lost ball in high weeds" "knee high to a grasshopper" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HowboutthemCowboys Posted March 24, 2011 Share Posted March 24, 2011 She was so tight, it was like trying to stuff a marshmallow in a piggy bank. She's so untight it was like tossin a hot dog down a hallway. She looks like she fell out of an ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nogohawk Posted March 24, 2011 Share Posted March 24, 2011 She looks like she fell out of an ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down. Gotta remember that one! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Perchoutofwater Posted April 12, 2011 Share Posted April 12, 2011 ..where the tea is sweet and accents are sweeter, summer starts in April, front porches are wide and words are long, macaroni & cheese is a vegetable, BBQ is the state food, y'all is a proper pronoun, chicken is fried, biscuits come with gravy, everyone is honey, someone is always getting their heart blessed, and we are all "fixin" to do something. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.