SeductiveNun Posted January 12, 2006 Share Posted January 12, 2006 Guess we know where he stands on the death penalty issue. 'Impaler' to run for Governor Updated: 01/12/2006 12:03:46 PM Print Story | Email to a Friend MINNEAPOLIS (AP) _ One gubernatorial candidate in Minnesota is giving a whole new meaning to the ``dark side'' of politics. A man who calls himself a satanic priest plans to run for governor on a 13-point platform that includes the public impaling of terrorists at the state Capitol building. Jonathon Sharkey, also known as ``The Impaler'', plans to launch his gubernatorial campaign on _ when else? _ Friday the 13th. He'll make the announcement in Princeton. ``I'm going to be totally open and honest,'' said the 41-year-old leader of the ``Vampyres, Witches and Pagans Party.'' ``Unlike other candidates, I'm not going to hide my evil side,'' he said. In Minnesota, anyone who pays the $300 filing fee can get on the gubernatorial ballot and it seems that every year a few eccentric candidates make the rounds. Sharkey raises the bar. For one thing, he told the Star Tribune in an e-mail that he drinks blood. Including the impaling of terrorists, rapists, drug dealers and other criminals, Sharkey's platform includes emphasis on education, tax breaks for farmers and better benefits for veterans. Sharkey said he worships Lucifer and, while he says he has nothing against Christians, he calls the ``Christian God the Father'' his ``mortal enemy.'' Sharkey said he was injured during a parachute jump with the Army in 1982 and receives veterans' disability benefits. He has not yet registered as a gubernatorial candidate, but he has already filed as a candidate for the 2008 presidential election. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rebellab Posted January 12, 2006 Share Posted January 12, 2006 That was a disappointment, I was hoping it would be Mike Tice. Minnesota is the state that elected Jesse "the Body" Ventura. Could happen Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ursa Majoris Posted January 12, 2006 Share Posted January 12, 2006 The original Impaler would have kicked his sorry ass. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NSab Posted January 12, 2006 Share Posted January 12, 2006 I thought you were talking about Vlad. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ursa Majoris Posted January 12, 2006 Share Posted January 12, 2006 I thought you were talking about Vlad. 1262354[/snapback] My hero! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Yukon Cornelius Posted January 12, 2006 Share Posted January 12, 2006 Guess we know where he stands on the death penalty issue. 1262255[/snapback] could happen in Mn..... sounds like a republican Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MikesVikes Posted January 12, 2006 Share Posted January 12, 2006 I was going to post the same thing. Here's his website. link Obtw, he also wants to be the President of the United States in 2008. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SeductiveNun Posted January 12, 2006 Author Share Posted January 12, 2006 That was a disappointment, I was hoping it would be Mike Tice. Minnesota is the state that elected Jesse "the Body" Ventura. Could happen 1262301[/snapback] Tough to be a governor and coach the Jets all at the same time. Actually, I think Nord the Barbarian would be a better choice. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Savage Beatings Posted January 12, 2006 Share Posted January 12, 2006 The original Impaler would have kicked his sorry ass. 1262308[/snapback] I think I heard that they call this guy the Impaler beause he advocates Impaling certain criminals on a post outside of the State Capital as punishment for the worst crimes. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ursa Majoris Posted January 12, 2006 Share Posted January 12, 2006 I think I heard that they call this guy the Impaler beause he advocates Impaling certain criminals on a post outside of the State Capital as punishment for the worst crimes. 1262670[/snapback] That's right. He bases it on Vlad the Impaler, which is where the original Dracula legend comes from. Vlad's actual name was Vlad Dracula (Son of the Dragon or Devil). He was a Romanian leader who was an appaling butcher. He had a habit of impaling prisoners slowly while he was having his dinner. He also sent back Turkish peace envoys with their turbans nailed to their heads, amongst a litany of other savagery. This Minny twit thinks he's a vampire too. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Big John Posted January 13, 2006 Share Posted January 13, 2006 That's right. He bases it on Vlad the Impaler, which is where the original Dracula legend comes from. Vlad's actual name was Vlad Dracula (Son of the Dragon or Devil). He was a Romanian leader who was an appaling butcher. He had a habit of impaling prisoners slowly while he was having his dinner. He also sent back Turkish peace envoys with their turbans nailed to their heads, amongst a litany of other savagery. This Minny twit thinks he's a vampire too. 1262759[/snapback] One of yukon's previous screen names was Vlad the Impaler. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MikesVikes Posted January 13, 2006 Share Posted January 13, 2006 One of yukon's previous screen names was Vlad the Impaler. 1262819[/snapback] Yukon, is that you? Obviously the dude is all over the news today and he doesn't deserve any of it. I heard him talk on a radio show today. The dude seems to be all hype and sounds like a regular guy. As regular of a guy that talks about vampires at least. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Big John Posted January 13, 2006 Share Posted January 13, 2006 Yukon, is that you? 1263031[/snapback] He works in Minnesota, but lives in Wisconsin, so it can't be yukon. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Clubfoothead Posted January 13, 2006 Share Posted January 13, 2006 So he's running as a republican? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MikesVikes Posted January 13, 2006 Share Posted January 13, 2006 He works in Minnesota, but lives in Wisconsin, so it can't be yukon. 1263036[/snapback] I don't understand....Is Wisconsin easier to spell? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Big John Posted January 13, 2006 Share Posted January 13, 2006 I don't understand....Is Wisconsin easier to spell? 1263075[/snapback] Don't you need to be a Minnesota resident to run for govenor there? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ursa Majoris Posted January 13, 2006 Share Posted January 13, 2006 So he's running as a republican? 1263038[/snapback] He's a bloodsucking bassturd, so yes. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Savage Beatings Posted January 16, 2006 Share Posted January 16, 2006 Well, this guy's wife was fired today from her job as a bus driver. Stay tuned for a huge lawsuit! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Azazello1313 Posted January 16, 2006 Share Posted January 16, 2006 i was thinking bobby the brain heenan would be a good choice Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.