gilthorp Posted July 14, 2009 Share Posted July 14, 2009 sit back and let it be what it is, brother...enjoy life as it comes. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
whomper Posted July 14, 2009 Author Share Posted July 14, 2009 Is it the business of every family she visits/spends time with? Will this little girl's family have to discuss her fairly common pidgeon-toedness with every friend she ever has? Sorry, but I don't think it needs to be something that could potentially come between your families. Trust me, they are fully aware of her issue. Its a tough spot for you, but the best you can do is make sure your home is as safe as possible (the same way you would if your kids were friends with someone on crutches or some other ailment that could affect their coordination). Or, if you are genuinely worried you would be liable for an injury to her, the other route is to not allow her to play at your place at all....which is an exceptionally harsh alternative. Go a tad further....suppose you do ask her parents whats up, and they say "Yes, she does fall a lot, and its due to her being pigeon-toed...we have taken her to specialists, and they all feel she'll grow put of it in 2-3 years." Then what? You've put your relationship in a "wierd" spot, and really gained nothing, other than letting them know that you noticed her ailment and were bold enough to inquire. This pretty much nails it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
millerx Posted July 14, 2009 Share Posted July 14, 2009 i know if it were turned around and someone asked me about my kids, i wouldn't get mad about it. i'd be used to it and would just tell them what is going on and then move on. that way it's out there and doesn't need to be talked/wondered about anymore. i wouldn't think it would be a big deal. of course, i'm assuming the person is coming from a caring place vs. a condescending place, and i couldn't see whomp ever coming off that way (at least not in here ... ) I'd start making her wear one of those padded helmets when she over at your house. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cdrudge Posted July 14, 2009 Share Posted July 14, 2009 Trust me, they are fully aware of her issue.I wouldn't always bet on that. Many times it takes someone else pointing out the issue for a parent to take notice. While it's not quite the same, every year many kids take home notes from school that inform parents that their kids didn't pass a vision or hearing test, or that there is some type of a learning disability that ends up being ADD, ADHD, autism spectrum disorder, etc. Sometimes parents don't see, or at least don't want to see, the problems their children have and dismiss the symptoms as just "clumsiness just runs in the family" or "she's just hitting a growth spurt". My .02 is just be frank, but don't pry. Just come out and say something but be polite. I wouldn't be offended if my neighbors said something. I know this because they have. Not specifically like how it's being talked about here, but similar in they were pointing out issues that they have seen over time with our sons that they have also had to deal with their kids. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
i_am_the_swammi Posted July 14, 2009 Share Posted July 14, 2009 Many times it takes someone else pointing out the issue for a parent to take notice. While it's not quite the same, every year many kids take home notes from school that inform parents that their kids didn't pass a vision or hearing test, or that there is some type of a learning disability that ends up being ADD, ADHD, autism spectrum disorder, etc. Sometimes parents don't see, or at least don't want to see, the problems their children have and dismiss the symptoms as just "clumsiness just runs in the family" or "she's just hitting a growth spurt". Are you really saying that what the Whomps notice as a severe case of pigeon-toe, the girls own parents aren't aware of? Your examples are apples-to-oranges....ADD, vision and hearing impairments are undetectable to the naked eye, which is much of the reason they conduct the tests in the first place: to detect what is visually undetectable. I'll stand by my original sentiment that the girls parents are surely aware of her impediment. I'll also venture a guess that the parents are more than self-conscious over other people's perception of her. Let the other family get to a point where they feel comfortable discussing it first. In the end, I still don't get what the benefit would be to bring it up to them, unless you truly believe you are alerting them to an a issue to which they are unaware (impossible unless the girl has never been to a doctor). The more likely scenario is that you end up confirming their worst fear: that everywhere they go, people notice her "handicap" rather than the girl herself. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
whomper Posted July 14, 2009 Author Share Posted July 14, 2009 i know if it were turned around and someone asked me about my kids, i wouldn't get mad about it. i'd be used to it and would just tell them what is going on and then move on. that way it's out there and doesn't need to be talked/wondered about anymore. i wouldn't think it would be a big deal. of course, i'm assuming the person is coming from a caring place vs. a condescending place, and i couldn't see whomp ever coming off that way (at least not in here ... ) It would certainly be from a caring place. We love that kid. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tonorator Posted July 14, 2009 Share Posted July 14, 2009 Go a tad further....suppose you do ask her parents whats up, and they say "Yes, she does fall a lot, and its due to her being pigeon-toed...we have taken her to specialists, and they all feel she'll grow put of it in 2-3 years." Then what? You've put your relationship in a "wierd" spot, and really gained nothing, other than letting them know that you noticed her ailment and were bold enough to inquire. it let them know that you care and that you were interested in knowing if there was anything you could do for the well being of the child since she is going to be playing at your house all the time. i think as these guys become closer as families, this will come out at some point anyway. It would certainly be from a caring place. We love that kid. absolutely know that. i was more referring to how it might not come across that way because people can take things the wrong way. once you guys know each other better this won't be a big deal to discuss. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dmarc117 Posted July 14, 2009 Share Posted July 14, 2009 some people get crazy when you talk about their kids. even if it is in good faith. tread lightly. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
i_am_the_swammi Posted July 14, 2009 Share Posted July 14, 2009 i think as these guys become closer as families, this will come out at some point anyway. my point exactly. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Retrograde assault Posted July 15, 2009 Share Posted July 15, 2009 If my kid had that problem and was playing at the Whomper house I would feel comfortable with her well being. I would also talk to Mr and Mrs Whomper about by childs physical condition in private, away from her. But thats me and I'm not her parent. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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