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DemonKnight
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Top 100 Quotes from Christian Chat/Message Boards

 

Meh Fundie!

How can anyone beleive we evolved from monkeys heres a few questions for people who beleive that

 

1.If we did evolve from monkeys then how come babies arent born monkeys

 

2.Even Darwin said his theories were wrong before he died so why do you still believe them

 

3.do you really not believe the bible it says we were created in seven days not millions of years

 

4.how come we cant speak monkey

 

Just for a fact ape like creatures are monkeys Just in case certain people get on this thread

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Apes are just creatures twisted by Satan to mock Jesus by giving EVILolition credibility. Further more they are naturally lust crazed for human women. Since they are not natural creatures they should be exterminated forthwith as the tools of evil they are.

BJ Tabor, Blogs4Brownback [Comments (92)] [2007-Aug-01]

 

:D

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When two guy's have sex they can only penetrate eachother through the crack which I think is disgusting because of all the crap that's in there. They both must face the same direction and thus one guy's twig and berries will be projecting from the two. Because no man has a vagina they can't become one flesh when having normal sex.

 

Women don't have Jimmy and his two buddies hanging around so they can't naturally penetrate eachother and become one flesh.

 

Oral with dudes can't be natural because the legs will be poking out from different directions as will the ladies if they participate in oral sex.

 

Oral with the opposite sex still isn't natural because you still have the leg issue and often someone is further down if they are not on top of eachother.

 

Anal with opposites is still excluded from natural sex because once again your are sticking your think in a crap hole and a womans tits are usually projecting outward.

 

When the Bible is speaking of becoming one flesh it literally means that there is nothing sticking out in the clear and that the man and woman are facing eachother. Face to Face.

 

Captain Planet '08 :D, Myspace [Comments (69)] [2006-Sep-22]

 

:D

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Gravity: Doesn't exist. If items of mass had any impact of others, then mountains should have people orbiting them. Or the space shuttle in space should have the astronauts orbiting it. Of course, that's just the tip of the gravity myth. Think about it. Scientists want us to believe that the sun has a gravitation pull strong enough to keep a planet like neptune or pluto in orbit, but then it's not strong enough to keep the moon in orbit? Why is that? What I believe is going on here is this: These objects in space have yet to receive mans touch, and thus have no sin to weigh them down. This isn't the case for earth, where we see the impact of transfered sin to material objects. The more sin, the heavier something is.

 

:D This makes as much sense as any scientific theory I've ever misunderstood. I think schools should be required to teach this alternative theory of gravity.

Edited by AtomicCEO
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Gravity: Doesn't exist. If items of mass had any impact of others, then mountains should have people orbiting them. Or the space shuttle in space should have the astronauts orbiting it. Of course, that's just the tip of the gravity myth. Think about it. Scientists want us to believe that the sun has a gravitation pull strong enough to keep a planet like neptune or pluto in orbit, but then it's not strong enough to keep the moon in orbit? Why is that? What I believe is going on here is this: These objects in space have yet to receive mans touch, and thus have no sin to weigh them down. This isn't the case for earth, where we see the impact of transfered sin to material objects. The more sin, the heavier something is.

 

:D This makes as much sense as any scientific theory I've ever misunderstood. I think schools should be required to teach this alternative theory of gravity.

 

 

I just jumped 22 feet in the air straight up and i am typing this while still in the air ...

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about a girl being born with mental disabilities

 

This girl is like a leper so what she needs to do is try and find god

 

if she really believes she can be healed from this state, she will be healed from this state

 

Most afflictions like this are caused by sins committed while still inside the womb. If she can repent for what she does god will embrace her and make her as human as you or me but if she chooses not to she'll always be like this

 

god tests every one of us

:D

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Apes are just creatures twisted by Satan to mock Jesus by giving EVILolition credibility. Further more they are naturally lust crazed for human women. Since they are not natural creatures they should be exterminated forthwith as the tools of evil they are.

BJ Tabor, Blogs4Brownback [Comments (92)] [2007-Aug-01]

 

:D

 

Wait a minute, are you saying Christians want to kill H8?

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I find it hard to believe these poeple know how to blow their own noses, never mind turn on a computer...

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How can anyone beleive we evolved from monkeys heres a few questions for people who beleive that

 

These people should take a 5 minute break from having the bible shoved up their asses and learn how to spell "Believe". . . .not that it's a common word in religious circles or anything.

 

:D

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These people should take a 5 minute break from having the bible shoved up their asses and learn how to spell "Believe". . . .not that it's a common word in religious circles or anything.

 

:D

 

Well, it's apparent that you are going to hell.

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This has wrecked my workday. It's like watching a slow motion train wreck.

 

If u have sex before marriage then in Gods eyes u are married to that person if a man rapes a woman in Gods eyes they are married it sucks for the girl but what can we do lol
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