sundaynfl Posted January 19, 2006 Share Posted January 19, 2006 After much debate, I have decided to write my first book on golf. I believe it gives the reader valuable playing tips and insider information that I have learned over the years. The cost is only $29.95. Cash only please! The following chapter listing is presented to give you a quick overview: Chapter 1 - How to Properly Line Up Your Fourth Putt Chapter 2 - How to Hit a crappy shoes from spammers from the Rough When You Hit a Titleist from the Tee Chapter 3 - How to Avoid the Water When You Lie 8 in a Bunker Chapter 4 - How to Get More Distance Off the Shank Chapter 5 - When to Give the Ranger the Finger Chapter 6 - Using Your Shadow on the Greens to Maximize Earnings Chapter 7 - When to Implement Handicap Management Chapter 8 - Proper Excuses for Drinking Beer Before 9 a.m. Chapter 9 - How to Rationalize a 6 Hour Round Chapter 10 - How to Find That Ball That Everyone Else Saw Go in the Water Chapter 11 - Why Your Spouse Doesn't Care That You Birdied the 5th Chapter 12 - How to Let a Foursome Play Through Your Twosome Chapter 13 - How to Relax When You Are Hitting Three Off the Tee Chapter 14 - When to Suggest Major Swing Corrections to Your Opponent Chapter 15 - God and the Meaning of the Birdie-to-Bogey Three Putt Chapter 16 - When to Regrip Your Ball Retriever Chapter 17 - Can You Purchase a Better Golf Game Chapter 18 - Why Male Golfers Will Pay $5.00 a Beer From The Cart Girl and Give Her a $3 Tip, But Will squeal at $3.50 at the 19th Hole and stiff the bartender Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NSab Posted January 19, 2006 Share Posted January 19, 2006 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
twiley Posted January 19, 2006 Share Posted January 19, 2006 Chapter 8 - Proper Excuses for Drinking Beer Before 9 a.m. 1276190[/snapback] If you need to borrow my notes, let me know. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChuckB Posted January 19, 2006 Share Posted January 19, 2006 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Big John Posted January 19, 2006 Share Posted January 19, 2006 We might have a problem with plagerism. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NSab Posted January 19, 2006 Share Posted January 19, 2006 We might have a problem with plagerism. 1276224[/snapback] Amazing! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cunning Linguist Posted January 19, 2006 Share Posted January 19, 2006 We might have a problem with plagerism. 1276224[/snapback] Big John should change his name to Big Brother Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rhippens Posted January 19, 2006 Share Posted January 19, 2006 We might have a problem with plagerism. 1276224[/snapback] how? unreal. the golf stuff is funny though. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sundaynfl Posted January 19, 2006 Author Share Posted January 19, 2006 We might have a problem with plagerism. 1276224[/snapback] LOL... just cut and pasted a joke from my e-mail... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CowboysDiehard Posted January 19, 2006 Share Posted January 19, 2006 How about this...would you pay $5 to add 50 yards to your tee shots and lower your score by up to 5 strokes INSTANTLY? . . . . . I'll save you the 5 bucks, just the kind of guy I am.... . . .....Play from the ladies tees and skip the 18th hole. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rocknrobn26 Posted January 19, 2006 Share Posted January 19, 2006 Where's the info on Multiple Mulligans and using winter rules in June? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skippy Posted January 19, 2006 Share Posted January 19, 2006 Pretty good. Footwedge has got to be worked in there somehow. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
twiley Posted January 19, 2006 Share Posted January 19, 2006 Footwedge has got to be worked in there somehow. 1276422[/snapback] That's my favorite club. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
loaf Posted January 19, 2006 Share Posted January 19, 2006 There's a guy in the office we call "Gillette" cause he always shaves his score Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jimmy Neutron Posted January 19, 2006 Share Posted January 19, 2006 Pretty good. Footwedge has got to be worked in there somehow. 1276422[/snapback] I thought about that too. Just sent this list to the other 3 guys I'll be sharing a round with here in Vegas next month. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
darin3 Posted January 19, 2006 Share Posted January 19, 2006 That's my favorite club. 1276445[/snapback] Somewhere, clubfoothead is off sobbing his eyes out. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Big F'n Dave Posted January 19, 2006 Share Posted January 19, 2006 We might have a problem with plagerism. 1276224[/snapback] That site has my favorite golf joke: It was a sunny Saturday morning on the course and I was beginning my pre-shot routine, visualizing my upcoming shot, when a voice came over the clubhouse loudspeaker. "Would the gentleman on the woman's tee back up to the men's tee please!!" I was still deep in my routine, seemingly impervious to the interruption. Again the announcement, "Would the MAN on the WOMEN'S tee kindly back up to the men's tee." I simply ignored the guy and kept concentrating, when once more, the man yelled: "Would the man on the woman's tee back up to the men's tee, PLEASE!" I finally stopped, turned, looked through the clubhouse window directly at the person with the mike and shouted back, "Would the person in the clubhouse kindly shut up and let me play my second shot?" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rocknrobn26 Posted January 19, 2006 Share Posted January 19, 2006 Pretty good. Footwedge has got to be worked in there somehow. 1276422[/snapback] The arm chipper used to work well when I was buried in the trees and no one could see me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChuckB Posted January 19, 2006 Share Posted January 19, 2006 That site has my favorite golf joke: It was a sunny Saturday morning on the course and I was beginning my pre-shot routine, visualizing my upcoming shot, when a voice came over the clubhouse loudspeaker. "Would the gentleman on the woman's tee back up to the men's tee please!!" I was still deep in my routine, seemingly impervious to the interruption. Again the announcement, "Would the MAN on the WOMEN'S tee kindly back up to the men's tee." I simply ignored the guy and kept concentrating, when once more, the man yelled: "Would the man on the woman's tee back up to the men's tee, PLEASE!" I finally stopped, turned, looked through the clubhouse window directly at the person with the mike and shouted back, "Would the person in the clubhouse kindly shut up and let me play my second shot?" 1276502[/snapback] Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rocknrobn26 Posted January 20, 2006 Share Posted January 20, 2006 That site has my favorite golf joke: It was a sunny Saturday morning on the course and I was beginning my pre-shot routine, visualizing my upcoming shot, when a voice came over the clubhouse loudspeaker. "Would the gentleman on the woman's tee back up to the men's tee please!!" I was still deep in my routine, seemingly impervious to the interruption. Again the announcement, "Would the MAN on the WOMEN'S tee kindly back up to the men's tee." I simply ignored the guy and kept concentrating, when once more, the man yelled: "Would the man on the woman's tee back up to the men's tee, PLEASE!" I finally stopped, turned, looked through the clubhouse window directly at the person with the mike and shouted back, "Would the person in the clubhouse kindly shut up and let me play my second shot?" 1276502[/snapback] That was me too! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chargerz Posted January 20, 2006 Share Posted January 20, 2006 There's a guy in the office we call "Gillette" cause he always shaves his score 1276449[/snapback] Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Sores Posted January 20, 2006 Share Posted January 20, 2006 We might have a problem with plagerism. 1276224[/snapback] I was gonna find it too.....read through to see if anyone saved me the time. Good job BJ. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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