forever in debt to mo lewis Posted May 12, 2005 Share Posted May 12, 2005 Ravens’ Top Pick Feels Self-Conscious About Lack Of Police Record BALTIMORE--Receiver Mark Clayton, the Baltimore Ravens’ top pick in the 2005 NFL draft, is feeling self conscious about his lack of police record. Clayton desperately wants to be accepted in the clubhouse, but is afraid his spotless record will isolate him from his teammates. “It’s great to be coming to the Ravens and all, but to tell you the truth, I feel a little self conscious here,” said Clayton, the former Oklahoma star. “I mean, you’ve got people like Ray Lewis and Jamal Lewis, and even Terrell Suggs. All these guys have been in trouble with the law at one point in their careers. Me? I haven’t done shucks. Oh, there was that one time I didn’t pay a parking ticket, but that’s about it. God, I am such a dork. It’s a wonder why the Ravens even drafted me. I’m not going to fit in at all.” Clayton was a model citizen during his college career, a fact that he hopes to hide from teammates. “Please, please don’t call me that. Jesus, somebody might hear you,” Clayton told reporters after a team workout. “I am not a model citizen. One time, when I was a kid, I threw some eggs at a house on Halloween. I’m not proud of it, but we all have skeletons in our closets. Oh, shucks. Here comes Ray. I have to pretend I’m all pumped up. Ready? Here goes. Yes! Come on! Dig Deeper! Pain is only temporary! Aaaaaargh!” With his brief tenure on the team, Clayton has already been forced to lie in order to cover up his lack of police record. To him, the lying is justified if it helps him bond with his teammates. “Normally I don’t like fibbing, but sometimes a white lie is necessary in order to keep up appearances,” said Clayton. “Like the other day, everyone was sitting around bragging about their exploits, and I was feeling left out. So when the guys started prodding me about the craziest thing I’ve ever done, I had to think up something quick. So I told them I set an elementary school on fire and laughed while it burned. They didn’t seem all that impressed.” While there are many players on the Ravens who share Clayton’s lack of arrest record, some of the most prominent and popular players have been to jail at one point or another. This common bond is something that Clayton cannot share. However, coach Brian Billick said performance on the field is more important than off field issues. “A lot of guys come in here thinking they have to be a criminal in order to fit in with the big boys, but nothing could be further from the truth,” said Billick. “Our guys are very open minded to whoever joins this team. Guys like Ray, Jamal, Terrell, Corey—they could care less what you’ve done in the past. Then we have guys like Kyle Boller. He’d be a great guy for Mark to spend some time with. They can play checkers or watch Saved By the Bell, or whatever it is that pussies like them do with their time.” Over the years, the Ravens have acquired a reputation as a team that isn’t afraid to take chances on players of questionable character. Billick believes that philosophy has helped the team on the field. “It’s great not to be limited to ‘character guys’ or whatever you want to call them,” said Billick. “We just get people who can play football, plain and simple. We ain't the boy scouts, that’s for sure. But if I were Mark I certainly wouldn’t be worried about fitting in. If he helps us win games, he’ll fit in just fine. That should be a big challenge for him, though. Even though he’s a great receiver, he’s got a truly terrible quarterback throwing to him. Last year, we had to assemble one the best defenses in the league just to finish 9-7.” In the end, Clayton knows that it will come down to his performance on the field. He’s been working hard to understand Billick’s offense so he can make an impact right away. However, he still shies away from talk about his dark past. “I really don’t enjoy standing here addressing things that didn’t happen years ago,” he said. “I’m a football player, first and foremost. If I could go back in time I would change a lot of things about my life, but who wouldn’t? I just would rather focus on the game. Please stop asking me about my spotless record, and please, please stop calling me a goddarn model citizen. I’m so sick of hearing that phrase. Let me ask you this: Would a model citizen throw a Burger King wrapper out the window of his car, even though it’s a clear violation of state laws against littering? Exactly. Well I did that yesterday. Totally flouted the law. Are you getting all this down?” Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rovers Posted May 13, 2005 Share Posted May 13, 2005 maybe he should hang out with pac-man. that oughta get him a criminal record in no time! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Trots Posted May 13, 2005 Share Posted May 13, 2005 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BS Miscreant Posted May 13, 2005 Share Posted May 13, 2005 uh-huh Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fatman Posted May 13, 2005 Share Posted May 13, 2005 Awesome Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Menudo Posted May 13, 2005 Share Posted May 13, 2005 One of the best, most accurate articles I've ever seen. BRAVO ! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
trrhyne Posted May 13, 2005 Share Posted May 13, 2005 No wonder the Cowboys didn't draft him. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MikesVikes Posted May 13, 2005 Share Posted May 13, 2005 (edited) Now that you think about it, the Ravens could field an entire team for "The Longest Yard." Complete with ugly, toothless dudes no doubt. Maybe Clayton will be one of those toothless dudes. Edited May 13, 2005 by MikesVikes Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fatman Posted May 13, 2005 Share Posted May 13, 2005 Ravens’ Top Pick Feels Self-Conscious About Lack Of Police Record BALTIMORE--Receiver Mark Clayton, the Baltimore Ravens’ top pick in the 2005 NFL draft, is feeling self conscious about his lack of police record. Clayton desperately wants to be accepted in the clubhouse, but is afraid his spotless record will isolate him from his teammates. “It’s great to be coming to the Ravens and all, but to tell you the truth, I feel a little self conscious here,” said Clayton, the former Oklahoma star. “I mean, you’ve got people like Ray Lewis and Jamal Lewis, and even Terrell Suggs. All these guys have been in trouble with the law at one point in their careers. Me? I haven’t done shucks. Oh, there was that one time I didn’t pay a parking ticket, but that’s about it. God, I am such a dork. It’s a wonder why the Ravens even drafted me. I’m not going to fit in at all.” Clayton was a model citizen during his college career, a fact that he hopes to hide from teammates. “Please, please don’t call me that. Jesus, somebody might hear you,” Clayton told reporters after a team workout. “I am not a model citizen. One time, when I was a kid, I threw some eggs at a house on Halloween. I’m not proud of it, but we all have skeletons in our closets. Oh, shucks. Here comes Ray. I have to pretend I’m all pumped up. Ready? Here goes. Yes! Come on! Dig Deeper! Pain is only temporary! Aaaaaargh!” With his brief tenure on the team, Clayton has already been forced to lie in order to cover up his lack of police record. To him, the lying is justified if it helps him bond with his teammates. “Normally I don’t like fibbing, but sometimes a white lie is necessary in order to keep up appearances,” said Clayton. “Like the other day, everyone was sitting around bragging about their exploits, and I was feeling left out. So when the guys started prodding me about the craziest thing I’ve ever done, I had to think up something quick. So I told them I set an elementary school on fire and laughed while it burned. They didn’t seem all that impressed.” While there are many players on the Ravens who share Clayton’s lack of arrest record, some of the most prominent and popular players have been to jail at one point or another. This common bond is something that Clayton cannot share. However, coach Brian Billick said performance on the field is more important than off field issues. “A lot of guys come in here thinking they have to be a criminal in order to fit in with the big boys, but nothing could be further from the truth,” said Billick. “Our guys are very open minded to whoever joins this team. Guys like Ray, Jamal, Terrell, Corey—they could care less what you’ve done in the past. Then we have guys like Kyle Boller. He’d be a great guy for Mark to spend some time with. They can play checkers or watch Saved By the Bell, or whatever it is that pussies like them do with their time.” Over the years, the Ravens have acquired a reputation as a team that isn’t afraid to take chances on players of questionable character. Billick believes that philosophy has helped the team on the field. “It’s great not to be limited to ‘character guys’ or whatever you want to call them,” said Billick. “We just get people who can play football, plain and simple. We ain't the boy scouts, that’s for sure. But if I were Mark I certainly wouldn’t be worried about fitting in. If he helps us win games, he’ll fit in just fine. That should be a big challenge for him, though. Even though he’s a great receiver, he’s got a truly terrible quarterback throwing to him. Last year, we had to assemble one the best defenses in the league just to finish 9-7.” In the end, Clayton knows that it will come down to his performance on the field. He’s been working hard to understand Billick’s offense so he can make an impact right away. However, he still shies away from talk about his dark past. “I really don’t enjoy standing here addressing things that didn’t happen years ago,” he said. “I’m a football player, first and foremost. If I could go back in time I would change a lot of things about my life, but who wouldn’t? I just would rather focus on the game. Please stop asking me about my spotless record, and please, please stop calling me a goddarn model citizen. I’m so sick of hearing that phrase. Let me ask you this: Would a model citizen throw a Burger King wrapper out the window of his car, even though it’s a clear violation of state laws against littering? Exactly. Well I did that yesterday. Totally flouted the law. Are you getting all this down?” 812133[/snapback] I do have to say, this is a pretty random thing to devote all the time to write a fake article Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
1stimer Posted May 13, 2005 Share Posted May 13, 2005 That should be a big challenge for him, though. Even though he’s a great receiver, he’s got a truly terrible quarterback throwing to him. Last year, we had to assemble one the best defenses in the league just to finish 9-7.” 812133[/snapback] Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SGE_VIKE Posted May 13, 2005 Share Posted May 13, 2005 Don't worry I think the NFL must have a rookie rule for mentors. Maybe he could get the Whizz or maybe a wife beater from the Midwest. Give him that wholesome feel of back home but someone to increase his offender awareness. Anything to contribute to society right? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest aqualung Posted May 15, 2005 Share Posted May 15, 2005 Sounds like an msaint article. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jackshi17 Posted May 16, 2005 Share Posted May 16, 2005 Has Spain seen this? Knowing how much of a Ray Lewis fan he is his comments should be priceless! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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