It never ceases to amaze me

[detlef]

I know I've related stories along these lines before, but this one is easily the stupidest one yet. Honestly, it astounds me that these people can make it through an entire day without stabbing themselves with a pen or something like that.

 

I was at Jujube today around noon getting some prep done for the evening's specials. The way our place is set up, it's basically two rooms both with storefront exposure. The kitchen has a bar wrapped around the line and the dishwashing and such is in the back. So, in other words, if you're working in the front kitchen, people can see you from outside in front of the restaurant.

 

So, here's the scene:

I'm butchering some ducks and this person comes banging on the window trying to get my attention. I wash up and go unlock the front door. I'm guessing they either left something here last night or want a reso for tonight.

 

"Can I help you?"

"Yeah, I was just checking to see if you were open or not?"

"Right now?"

"Yep. Are you open?"

"Sorry, just dinner on Saturdays."

"Really?"

"Yep, we just do lunch on the weekdays."

"So, no lunch today."

"Nope, no lunch today."

"Alright then, I guess we'll take our business elsewhere."

"Sorry about that."

 

OK, the details:

1) The door is freaking locked

2) All the lights, save the ones in the kitchen are off

3) All the chairs are on the tables, which you can plainly see through the window (it's an entirely glass storefront).

4) There's an effing sign right next to the locked door that clearly states our hours

5) There is no visible sign of any activity what-so-ever going on in the restaurant besides a dude in a T-shirt butchering ducks

[geeteebee]

Little did you know that it was probably a huddler just trying to eff with you.

[redrumjuice]

I know it sucks to be downtown somewhere looking for a place to grab a bite and all the lazy people are closed on a Sat afternoon.

[detlef]

I know it sucks to be downtown somewhere looking for a place to grab a bite and all the lazy people are closed on a Sat afternoon.

Jujube isn't downtown

[Bier Meister]

did you hide the pens?

[chester]

When I call a restaurant/bar to find out if they are open at that time, what is the correct way to ask?

 

I've gotten snide remarks when I simply ask 'are you open?' such as 'duh, I answered the phone, didn't I?'

 

But I've also said 'just checking to make sure you are open' and gotten 'no, I'm just here butchering ducks'. (not really, but something similar).

 

I NEED TO KNOW THE CORRECT REQUEST!

[matt770]

When I call a restaurant/bar to find out if they are open at that time, what is the correct way to ask?

 

I've gotten snide remarks when I simply ask 'are you open?' such as 'duh, I answered the phone, didn't I?'

 

But I've also said 'just checking to make sure you are open' and gotten 'no, I'm just here butchering ducks'. (not really, but something similar).

 

I NEED TO KNOW THE CORRECT REQUEST!

 

If I called a place and politely asked if they were open and got a snide remark in response, I'd hear "We don't want your business. Go eat elsewhere."

[buddahj]

We get stuff like this all the time where I work. It's usually about a coupon. I've had people call up & ask how much for an oil change? I give them the regular price & then they will say something like, "Well, I have this coupon for $20." I just want to ask them, "How much do you think it is?"

[alexgaddis]

Did he say, "Hot enough for ya?"

[Rovers]

When I call a restaurant/bar to find out if they are open at that time, what is the correct way to ask?

 

I've gotten snide remarks when I simply ask 'are you open?' such as 'duh, I answered the phone, didn't I?'

 

But I've also said 'just checking to make sure you are open' and gotten 'no, I'm just here butchering ducks'. (not really, but something similar).

 

I NEED TO KNOW THE CORRECT REQUEST!

 

How about "What are your hours today?"

 

If you think you have had to answer a lot of stupid questions, try being a train conductor on the NYC subway. People expect you to know every single addrees in all five boroughs and exactly how to get there. Then when you don't know they curse you out and occassionally loft a wad of flem in your general direction. I really loved that job. It was fun.

[bpwallace49]

I have also seen hours of operation posted on a store window or door . .

[Ursa Majoris]

How about "What are your hours today?"

Pretty much my thought too.

[detlef]

When I call a restaurant/bar to find out if they are open at that time, what is the correct way to ask?

 

I've gotten snide remarks when I simply ask 'are you open?' such as 'duh, I answered the phone, didn't I?'

 

But I've also said 'just checking to make sure you are open' and gotten 'no, I'm just here butchering ducks'. (not really, but something similar).

 

I NEED TO KNOW THE CORRECT REQUEST!

Anyone giving a snide remark to either of those requests over the phone is vinegary fresh and doesn't deserve your business. How the hell are you supposed to freaking know? That's why you're calling. You shouldn't have to figure out the "right" way to ask, though Rovers has a pretty easy one.

 

If I called a place and politely asked if they were open and got a snide remark in response, I'd hear "We don't want your business. Go eat elsewhere."

Werd

 

How about "What are your hours today?"

 

If you think you have had to answer a lot of stupid questions, try being a train conductor on the NYC subway. People expect you to know every single addrees in all five boroughs and exactly how to get there. Then when you don't know they curse you out and occassionally loft a wad of flem in your general direction. I really loved that job. It was fun.

Dude, when people get pissy because you can't either read their mind or don't know everything about everything they think you should it's the worst.

 

I have also seen hours of operation posted on a store window or door . .

You must have missed that part in the initial post.

[Hugh 0ne]

You should get one of those things that spin at the barber shop that tells people you're open. You might start a new trend. YWIA.

[billay]

As businesses go, I think the general public is more clueless about how the restaurant industry operates than any other.

[Ursa Majoris]

As businesses go, I think the general public is more clueless about how the restaurant industry operates than any other.

And that's saying something.

[TimC]

Do the ducks come in alive?

[SEC=UGA]

Do the ducks come in alive?

 

Free range ducks, straight outta the Eno River state park.

[detlef]

As businesses go, I think the general public is more clueless about how the restaurant industry operates than any other.

I don't know enough about others to say whether or not that is true, but I wouldn't be surprised. If it is true, I would think it comes down to the fact that eating and cooking are pretty simple things so everyone underestimates everything about running a restaurant.

 

Sometimes, situations like the one I described above evolve into the people asking if I could just make them some food anyway. I mean, what's the big deal, right? I've got a walk-in full of food, they're hungry. They're willing to pay, of course. It's surprising how hard it is to explain to them that we're simply not open. "But we told our friends what a great place this is." They may not end up being dicks about it, but they're sort of implying that I am by pushing the issue and trying to guilt me into completely derailing my day.

 

And I'm not talking about someone showing up 20 minutes before we open. In that case, we often invite them in to hang at the bar, provided they don't mind the fact that we're still setting up. We can at least get them a drink and, often, can serve them depending on whether the kitchen is set up. At very least, they can come in out of the cold. Nor am I talking about someone coming in a few minutes after we're closed, provided the kitchen hasn't completely shut down.

 

But the notion that I've got a list a mile long of things to get ready for a Saturday and the manner in which I have staffed my restaurant for that day is very much predicated on the fact that I'm not going to have to stop what I'm doing, grab whatever they want out of the cooler, prepare it, serve them, etc. And then what happens if someone else walks by and sees them eating? Can't turn them away either.

 

And this says nothing of the fact that I'm willingly putting my worst foot forward by feeding them in a deserted dining room and alternating between waiting on them and butchering ducks. Will they really cut me any slack if the food is not up to par? You've told your friends how great this place is, and their first experience is going to be without any service what-so-ever, devoid of any ambiance that we also put effort into and likely will involve an ordering process where I explain that I actually can't make half the food you want (likely only realizing that I can't make said dish after you've ordered it and I go back to discover that we don't have something I need to make it, thus re-opening the whole ordering process again. All of which would be completely unacceptable on my part if we were actually open but is a near certainty in this case since there's absolutely no reason at all for me to bother knowing which of our lunch items I can and can't make on a day when we're not actually open for lunch) and, should you want anything grilled, it will take about 30 minutes for the grill to warm up.

[detlef]

Free range ducks, straight outta the Eno River state park.

Dude, how long ago was that UGA/FL game? Did you sign up to wear that sig for a year or something? Brutal. Or is it some kind of Stockholm Syndrome and you've just grown to love your captor.

[bpwallace49]

You must have missed that part in the initial post.

 

Yes.

 

yes I did.

 

[detlef]

We get stuff like this all the time where I work. It's usually about a coupon. I've had people call up & ask how much for an oil change? I give them the regular price & then they will say something like, "Well, I have this coupon for $20." I just want to ask them, "How much do you think it is?"

[Caveman_Nick]

I remember going out to dinner with a friend and his wife a number of years ago. The wife got a pasta type dish (maybe chicken parm or something).

 

After the meal when the server asked if she wanted to take hers home, she looked at the server with a straight face and asked "Could you make some more pasta and put it in with my leftovers?" Or something like that.

 

Many people are just in their own cloud of reality when it comes to eating out. I was mildly embarrassed and a little shocked that she had the nuts to ask for some extra free pasta to be made (she was clearly not looking to buy more pasta).

 

You never know what you will find.

 

Then again, from a customer's side I have been in full restaurants, withing the last several months and more than once, and been told at 10 PM that we couldn't order food (watching MNF) because the kitchen closes at 10. Really? At 10, and with a literally full house? How does this make sense from a business standpoint?

 

You never know what you might find or why people do what they do. On both sides of the coin.

[SEC=UGA]

Dude, how long ago was that UGA/FL game? Did you sign up to wear that sig for a year or something? Brutal. Or is it some kind of Stockholm Syndrome and you've just grown to love your captor.

 

I'm extremely lazy and haven't chosen a new sig line. Plus this just feeds the fuel of my rage about the absolutely horrendous season and the downward trajectory of this program under HCMR...

 

That and I love Unta who saddled me with these words.

[detlef]

Then again, from a customer's side I have been in full restaurants, withing the last several months and more than once, and been told at 10 PM that we couldn't order food (watching MNF) because the kitchen closes at 10. Really? At 10, and with a literally full house? How does this make sense from a business standpoint?

That's freaking lame. I remember one Saturday night, we were slam packed pretty late (which is not all that common. Even when we're busy, we're rarely seating tons of people right up against closing. At any rate, I'd probably put down 1-2 tables around 9:45 or so. For the record, kitchen doesn't close at 10pm, we stop seating at 10. We assume nearly everyone knows the drill and isn't going to sit down right at 10 and wait 30 minutes before they order or something like that, but if they do, sucks for us. At any rate, so one waiter in particular got sat those late tables. He was the closing waiter. Someone walks in at like 10:05 and I don't think twice about seating them, in his section. I think that was the only open table (or at least the only open nice table) I mean, he's just put the order in for one of his tables. He's not going anywhere any time soon. Besides the fact that he's the closing waiter, who better to take the table? Certainly not one of the waiters who's got nothing but people who have already paid or are eating desserts.

 

Dude has the balls to come up to me and get all pissy that I sat someone 5 minutes after closing. I gave him a look like, "If you make me explain this, you're not going to like how it goes."