Big Dogs Posted April 25, 2007 Share Posted April 25, 2007 Tough question, but I wouldn't even think of it before 16, except in groups of kids. I just read a good book about this and other things: Strong Fathers, Strong Daughters by Dr. Meg Meeker A little heavy on the religion recommendation for my taste, but otherwise solid advice (with some both horrific and inspiring stories) written from her perspective as a long-time pediatrician. One of the more interesting things was how the adult cognitive decision-making abilities really aren't there until the mid-20s, i.e. 'wisdom', despite the intellectual/physical abilities appearing during HS. Auto insurance companies know this too, which is why rates drop after age 25. I wonder if the military keeps this in mind.... Edit to add: insurance knows this from the accidents of course - they can't raise rates just for brain science sake.... Good Info Here!! I'll have to check that book out! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skylive5 Posted April 25, 2007 Share Posted April 25, 2007 I started dating in the traditional sense in 8th grade. What is that... 13? Anyway... there is a fine line between protective and overprotective. I took one girl to a dance and her father sat me down and tried like hell to intimidate me... including pulling out his 44 and showing it to me. Guess what... it worked! I never dated his daughter again. Instead of dating me, the nice honors student who at least pretended to respect women... she started dating a guy who's nicknames included "Trucker" and "Toughnuts". He did nasty awful things to her and talked about it constantly to whoever would listen. The father didn't scare him off, and instead the daughter moved out when she was 17. As far as I know, she's a trailer slut now. Nice work, Dad! Just because a kid is an honors student doesn't mean they can't be low-life a-holes when it comes to dating and their interaction with ones daughter. And there is also a fine line between being an absolute slug of a father and setting down with a daughters date and setting out the guidelines where the daughter is concerned. There is also a fine line between an intelligent and not so intelligent daughter and whether she is ready for the dating scene. Every kid is different and every kid has a timeline for maturity. Setting an age has to be a guideline and not set in stone. Mature kids know when it is time to start dating with responsibility. Parents usually know when that time comes too. And yes... for some daughters 35 is a perfect age to venture out on a first date. Times and dating are completely different than when I was a kid... and the same held true for when my daughter was a kid. The same holds true now for my grandkids. Firm, fair, and consistant. That is all you can be. I think kids still understand that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skylive5 Posted April 25, 2007 Share Posted April 25, 2007 What makes you think Sky can make another 14 years? I fully expect to NOT be here in 14 years. I have no desire to be 75. I mean...what's the point? Putting up with a whole new flock of Huddlers? Nah.... this new flock of Huddlers is enough. D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grits and Shins Posted April 25, 2007 Share Posted April 25, 2007 I fully expect to NOT be here in 14 years. I have no desire to be 75. I mean...what's the point? Putting up with a whole new flock of Huddlers? Nah.... this new flock of Huddlers is enough. D Well ... sadly it seems as if we deal with a whole new flow of Huddlers EVERY DAMN YEAR Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skylive5 Posted April 25, 2007 Share Posted April 25, 2007 Well ... sadly it seems as if we deal with a whole new flow of Huddlers EVERY DAMN YEAR As we do with issues with our kids. Some things just never change I guess. LOL Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
twiley Posted April 25, 2007 Share Posted April 25, 2007 A friend of mine allows supervised dates for his 14 year old daughter. He'll accompany them to the movies and then sit about 4 rows behind them. If the turd starts getting too close to his daughter he'll whip a milk dud at his head. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
muck Posted April 25, 2007 Share Posted April 25, 2007 A friend of mine allows supervised dates for his 14 year old daughter. He'll accompany them to the movies and then sit about 4 rows behind them. If the turd starts getting too close to his daughter he'll whip a milk dud at his head. Not bad. When I was a kid, I nearly always dated older girls. To the topic at hand ... my daughter is going to be 8 this summer ... half way to 16. IMO, it depends on your daughter and the boy. Some good girls are attracted to bad boys; these girls you (imo) hold back. Some good girls are attracted to good boys; these girls can (imo) start having group dates earlier. Also, you may want to join the NRA (even if you don't agree with the politics) so you can get a couple of hats and magazines to have lying around. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
yo mama Posted April 25, 2007 Share Posted April 25, 2007 Also, you may want to join the NRA (even if you don't agree with the politics) so you can get a couple of hats and magazines to have lying around. I think its important to meet the boy before any first date. Should you be "coincidentally" cleaning a gun during that first meeting, so be it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
spain Posted April 25, 2007 Share Posted April 25, 2007 (edited) Dating age for the daughter? That depends. Are we talking within or outside the family... Edited April 25, 2007 by spain Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chiefjay Posted April 25, 2007 Share Posted April 25, 2007 I'm guessing I'll be about 50 when I let her start dating. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AtomicCEO Posted April 25, 2007 Share Posted April 25, 2007 Instead of dating me, the nice honors student who at least pretended to respect women... Just because a kid is an honors student doesn't mean they can't be low-life a-holes when it comes to dating and their interaction with ones daughter. I wasn't making a generalizations. I was talking about me. We're you making a generalization, or talking about me? :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skylive5 Posted April 25, 2007 Share Posted April 25, 2007 I wasn't making a generalizations. I was talking about me. We're you making a generalization, or talking about me? :D I just know this is going to hurt your feelings..... but it isn't always about you ya know. LOL Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Coffeeman Posted April 25, 2007 Share Posted April 25, 2007 I'm guessing I'll be about 50 when I let her start dating. smart ass............. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
montster Posted April 25, 2007 Share Posted April 25, 2007 16 was the age for all 3 of my daughters, the rule is and always will be if the young guys want to even talk to my girls , they needed to go through me first. If they could deal with me, if they passed my tests, then maybe they could ask my daughter to the dance or prom etc. it is hard because of all the school dances etc around that age. Oh and the older boy thing, NO WAY! is anyone else picturing nsab as robert de niro in "meet the parents"? i think by "tests," nsab means lie detectors and sodium pentathol. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Delicious_bass Posted April 25, 2007 Share Posted April 25, 2007 On a related topic(sort of) at what age do you start/stop having control over what they wear? I am continually amazed at the clothes I see some younger girls in. Needless to say, they dress differently now than when I was that age. I dont have any kids, but I think I would have a difficult time letting my early teen daughter leave the house looking the way I see some of these kids look. In addition to being tacky and inappropriate, it can be dangerous. Whether it be a horned up 16 yr old from the school football team, or some sick old pedophile, neither is what you want chasing your daughter that much harder because she is in a mini-skirt at 14. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grits and Shins Posted April 25, 2007 Share Posted April 25, 2007 On a related topic(sort of) at what age do you start/stop having control over what they wear? I am continually amazed at the clothes I see some younger girls in. Needless to say, they dress differently now than when I was that age. I dont have any kids, but I think I would have a difficult time letting my early teen daughter leave the house looking the way I see some of these kids look. In addition to being tacky and inappropriate, it can be dangerous. Whether it be a horned up 16 yr old from the school football team, or some sick old pedophile, neither is what you want chasing your daughter that much harder because she is in a mini-skirt at 14. As long as they are under my roof I have control. I have made it absolutely clear to my daughter that modesty is required not optional. If they dress like sluts how exactly are we to know they aren't. Having said all that ... it is definitely becoming more difficult to find modest clothing. There was an article in a recent news magazine (US News I believe) about several very successful businesses that have opened that are entirely dedicated to producing fashionable modest clothing (anti-Brittany). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
yo mama Posted April 25, 2007 Share Posted April 25, 2007 (edited) On a related topic(sort of) at what age do you start/stop having control over what they wear? I am continually amazed at the clothes I see some younger girls in. Needless to say, they dress differently now than when I was that age. I dont have any kids, but I think I would have a difficult time letting my early teen daughter leave the house looking the way I see some of these kids look. In addition to being tacky and inappropriate, it can be dangerous. Whether it be a horned up 16 yr old from the school football team, or some sick old pedophile, neither is what you want chasing your daughter that much harder because she is in a mini-skirt at 14. I hear ya. I was at the zoo in Albuquerque last weekend, and I swear I thought it was "bring your hooker day." I realize the zoo is mostly for children and families. What blew my mind was, for the most part, the slutty looking girls *were* children with their families. Edited April 25, 2007 by yo mama Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
muck Posted April 25, 2007 Share Posted April 25, 2007 (edited) We're thinking about moving to the country and joining an Amish community... Edited April 25, 2007 by muck Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AtomicCEO Posted April 25, 2007 Share Posted April 25, 2007 I hear ya. I was at the zoo in Albuquerque last weekend, and I swear I thought it was "bring your hooker day." I realize the zoo is mostly for children and families. What blew my mind was, for the most part, the slutty looking girls *were* children with their families. As the father of only one son, I'd like to say... thank God for slutty girls (unless they are too young, then it's just sad.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
yo mama Posted April 26, 2007 Share Posted April 26, 2007 (edited) As the father of only one son, I'd like to say... thank God for slutty girls (unless they are too young, then it's just sad.) Junior high girls with "just do me" spelling out in sparkles across the ass of their hot pants was a little disturbing, considering they were at the zoo, with their parents. (Though, it did make the sea lion exhibit more interesting). And who the hell wears stiletto heels to the zoo? (Well, besides Skins). Edited April 26, 2007 by yo mama Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rocknrobn26 Posted April 26, 2007 Share Posted April 26, 2007 We never set any rules. They always went on "Group Dates", until the Senior Prom. But we never would have let her go out on a single date until HS. But that problem never came up. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nuke'em ttg Posted April 26, 2007 Author Share Posted April 26, 2007 ......thanks for the info, game plans and stories...... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jimmy Neutron Posted April 26, 2007 Share Posted April 26, 2007 16 and even then just group dates for a year or so. Of course, it depends on the maturity of the kid, but 16 is our general rule. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gilthorp Posted April 26, 2007 Share Posted April 26, 2007 I'm sure the real answer will come from Mrs. Thorp. I'll ask her. I can say whatever I want but they only real rule I'll have is that there are no dates unless I've met the boy first and have spent enough time with the kid to scare the crap out of him. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PantherDave Posted April 26, 2007 Share Posted April 26, 2007 I have two daughters.....what is this...."dating" you speak of ? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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