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I feel like such a dog...


Cunning Runt
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My 16yr old son has been VERY secretive about a girl at school even though he clearly likes her (I've never even met her).

 

So... I remembered his myspace password, which I made him give me when I allowed him on myspace a few years back - to make sure he was using it properly, no cyber predators, etc...

 

So anyway, using that password I was able to gain access to his facebook also and log in as him, and sure enough, here's that girl and they appear to be in love. At least that's what they say on each other's pages.

 

I do though feel like a dog for "spying" on him and logging in as him, but damn - kid wasn't telling me anything. I dunno though - if there's something I think my kids should share, I'm gonna do what I can to find out what it is. Not to use it against him, just to know.

 

She's cute though - I'll give him that much.

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I do though feel like a dog for "spying" on him and logging in as him, but damn - kid wasn't telling me anything.

 

Its your right and responsibility. I have a program where I can read my daughters emails, IMs and such. I am sure that someday I will read something icky that I wish I hadn't - but I can live with that. What I can't live with is the chance that something could happen and that I might have had the right tools to help her or prevent something bad and didn't do it.

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I know, I know.

 

Turnabout would indeed be fair play I 'spose.

 

But isn't sh-t supposed to flow downhill, not up?

 

Tough call I guess. Mine are 2 and 4. Right now I'm dealing with them always wanting to play with the same exact toy at the same exact time, even if that toy is a dirty tissue. Small kids, small problems I guess. So I have no advice or experience on dealing with a 16 year old. :wacko:

 

But hey, if she's a hottie, he's doing something right. :D

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Tough call I guess. Mine are 2 and 4. Right now I'm dealing with them always wanting to play with the same exact toy at the same exact time, even if that toy is a dirty tissue. Small kids, small problems I guess. So I have no advice or experience on dealing with a 16 year old. :wacko:

 

But hey, if she's a hottie, he's doing something right. :D

 

Oh, she's a hottie.

 

I have three sons, but I'm telling ya - if I had a 16yr old daughter instead, I'd have a built-in pool so all her friends would hang out at my house.

 

I'm such a pig.

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Oh, she's a hottie.

 

I have three sons, but I'm telling ya - if I had a 16yr old daughter instead, I'd have a built-in pool so all her friends would hang out at my house.

 

I'm such a pig.

 

For your son's sake, you should install a hot tub :wacko:

 

Otherwise, I think you are just parenting.

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Its your right and responsibility. I have a program where I can read my daughters emails, IMs and such. I am sure that someday I will read something icky that I wish I hadn't - but I can live with that. What I can't live with is the chance that something could happen and that I might have had the right tools to help her or prevent something bad and didn't do it.

 

What program does this? My friend has a daughter and asked me for a program like this but I didn't think one existed.

 

Oh and edit: CR you are doing nothing wrong especially since you said you will not use it against him.

Edited by MrTed46
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I told my son that he has slightly less right to privacy than a death row prisoner. Seriously - do not feel badly. Feel like a parent who cares.

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My 8 year old has a Diary. It was laying on the table one day and it said do not open. I didnt open it and my 5 year old was sitting at the table. She said look Daddy Rafaellas Diary is here. I said that is her private Diary and I am not going to read it. My little one said well I already did she likes Dominick :wacko:

Edited by whomper
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I concur with most of the folks here, CR. You've done nothing wrong. Just don't get caught and don't tell him - he will see it as spying for damn sure and will obviously deeply resent it. You should be pleased he's got this relationship going - secrecy about this kind of thing is nothing unusual in adolescents.

 

Some fatherly words about putting his di(k in a bag if he intends to dip it anywhere might be worthwhile......

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I concur with most of the folks here, CR. You've done nothing wrong. Just don't get caught and don't tell him - he will see it as spying for damn sure and will obviously deeply resent it. You should be pleased he's got this relationship going - secrecy about this kind of thing is nothing unusual in adolescents.

 

Some fatherly words about putting his di(k in a bag if he intends to dip it anywhere might be worthwhile......

 

Ya - I've told him a number of times about the whole condom thing. Abstinence is best - unrealistic, but best.

 

Next comes condoms 'cause I damn sure don't want a grandkid yet. Double -wrapped even.

 

Yep - we've had the discussion a number of times.

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Ya - I've told him a number of times about the whole condom thing. Abstinence is best - unrealistic, but best.

 

Next comes condoms 'cause I damn sure don't want a grandkid yet. Double -wrapped even.

 

Yep - we've had the discussion a number of times.

 

Double-wrapped is much worst than single. Too much friction can cause them both to rip and resulting in a grandkid. Believe it or not, I know someone who had this happen to and it turned out to be a epic disaster. Just throwing a FYI to everyone.

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Double-wrapped is much worst than single. Too much friction can cause them both to rip and resulting in a grandkid. Believe it or not, I know someone who had this happen to and it turned out to be a epic disaster. Just throwing a FYI to everyone.

 

Well - good to know. My wife told me the same thing and I told her she was full of it.

 

An independent source echoing her take gives much more credence to you both.

 

Ok then - I'll tell him that when he's tappin' that ass, to just wear one condom.

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My 16yr old son has been VERY secretive about a girl at school even though he clearly likes her (I've never even met her).

 

So... I remembered his myspace password, which I made him give me when I allowed him on myspace a few years back - to make sure he was using it properly, no cyber predators, etc...

 

So anyway, using that password I was able to gain access to his facebook also and log in as him, and sure enough, here's that girl and they appear to be in love. At least that's what they say on each other's pages.

 

I do though feel like a dog for "spying" on him and logging in as him, but damn - kid wasn't telling me anything. I dunno though - if there's something I think my kids should share, I'm gonna do what I can to find out what it is. Not to use it against him, just to know.

 

She's cute though - I'll give him that much.

I had to do this for my boss to check up on his 15 and 16 year old kids. Wise move on his part as we found that they were not only smoking pot and cigs but also this Blue Lotus crap that they were ordering off of the internet. Nipped the whole thing in the "Bud" so to speak.

You did nothing wrong and I wish my parents would have been able to check up on what I was doing that easily back in the day.

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Well - good to know. My wife told me the same thing and I told her she was full of it.

 

An independent source echoing her take gives much more credence to you both.

 

Ok then - I'll tell him that when he's tappin' that ass, to just wear one condom.

 

Technically, if he's tapping her ass, he wouldn't need a condom if your only concern is being a Grandpa. :wacko:

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I might be alone here, but I think that you may have crossed the line. I understand and agree with keeping an eye on what our kids are doing online. My step-daughter is 12 and she knows that we monitor her email account. I have no problem with that whatsoever.

 

It just seems to me that your intention (this time) wasn't to look out for the safety of your son so much as it was to just snoop into his personal life. You had to recall a password from a couple of years ago, so it doesn't sound like you have been doing much montioring lately. I think a 16 year old has a right to some measure of privacy. If he is into some girl but not ready to share that with you, then you should respect it. I think everyone here is justifying a violation of his privacy. Would the same people advocate reading a 16 year old's diary? I can understand if you suspected something was wrong... but it sounds kinda like you just wanted to be nosy.

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Forget the sex talk... I would nip all this "love" talk in the bud immediately.

 

"Son, being in love in high school is like going to Vegas and spending all your money before you get into the casino. Being monogamous at the age of 16 is like going to Six Flags and never getting off the Carousel all day. Live a little. Play the field. See if she has a hotter sister."

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Forget the sex talk... I would nip all this "love" talk in the bud immediately.

 

"Son, being in love in high school is like going to Vegas and spending all your money before you get into the casino. Being monogamous at the age of 16 is like going to Six Flags and never getting off the Carousel all day. Live a little. Play the field. See if she has a hotter mother."

 

Fixed.

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