detlef Posted January 9, 2008 Share Posted January 9, 2008 This, in fact, might be among my favorite stories: Background: I was traveling through China with the guy who owned the restaurant I was chef of and a friend of his. Along the way, we managed to get hooked up with the mayor of a somewhat large city. Through his translator, we fed him a line about the fact that we were checking out possible cities to start a chain of pizza joints and got hooked up with a tour of the city as well as dinner. When we arrived at dinner, we were sat a pretty big table with a bunch of local government dudes and their wives. I was sat between the Chinese woman I'd met on the bus who'd actually gotten us in with the mayor to begin with and the wife of one of the government guys. The woman from the bus barely spoke English and the wife only knew some words to Lionel Richie tunes which she kept singing over and over. At any rate, we commence to getting utterly plowed on Sorghum liquor called Baijo (sp?). Every time our glass was empty, it was filled. As soon as it was filled, somebody was toasting us. All the while, guys were getting up and singing kareoke. Either by themselves or they'd grab a waitress and bust a duet. At one point, the woman from the bus turns to me and says, "The mayor would like you to sing" I look at my friends, who are at the opposite end of the table working the translator for what's going on and tell them its our turn. They puss out. Of course, there was no western music on the machine, but I happened to know a bit of opera. I'd learned it while I was working at an Italian restaurant and used to sing to myself when I was on solo training rides (not sure why). So, I get up and start singing the rather famous part from Rigoletto, La Donna Mobile. If you don't know it by name, trust me, you know it. It's likely the most famous tune of the genre and has been used, without words, in dozens of commercials. At any rate, part way through I start forgetting words but, what the hell, I'm singing Italian in freaking China, so I just start making them up. Thing is, I totally nailed it. I realize I was drunk, but not so much that I couldn't tell if I was butchering the thing. I remember the look on my friends faces and their jaws had dropped. So, I finish and the entire restaurant erupts into a standing ovation. Pretty big place. Maybe about 100 or so people. Afterwards we got taken to a basketball game and got courtside seats. Both the mayor and us were passed out by halftime. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bier Meister Posted January 9, 2008 Share Posted January 9, 2008 bravisimo Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Azazello1313 Posted January 9, 2008 Share Posted January 9, 2008 i really only did karaoke once, meeting up at the place with some old family friends of my folks....got plastered and did a couple duets with my stepdad -- the lion sleeps tonight (he did the high part, i did the "a-weem-ah-way" ) and then we butchered the hell out of hank williams' jambalaya Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
twiley Posted January 9, 2008 Share Posted January 9, 2008 Excellent. My best and only moment happened when I was 18 and working at a summer camp as a counsler. The entire summer I was teamed up with this hot 26 year old assistant camp director which was OLD for me at the time and she always talked about how she had a guilty pleasure of listening to Elvis. Anyway - all of the camp counselors went out to the local town towards the end of the summer and got blasted at a bar that had kareoke. I was drunk enough to have the balls to get up on stage unprompted and sung a solo for "love me tender" by Elvis. I pulled the cheese ball crap and walked off stage and sung to her like those meatballs on American Idol. After I was done, the applause ensued and the hot ass 26 year old that I worked with and drooled over all summer comes up to me and literally tries to find out how my lunch tasted 8 hours earlier with her tongue. The rest of the night after we got back to camp could easily be written in Penthouse letters so I'll keep it clean. I was the talk of the camp the rest of the summer because I nailed her. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
detlef Posted January 9, 2008 Author Share Posted January 9, 2008 Excellent. My best and only moment happened when I was 18 and working at a summer camp as a counsler. The entire summer I was teamed up with this hot 26 year old assistant camp director which was OLD for me at the time and she always talked about how she had a guilty pleasure of listening to Elvis. Anyway - all of the camp counselors went out to the local town towards the end of the summer and got blasted at a bar that had kareoke. I was drunk enough to have the balls to get up on stage unprompted and sung a solo for "love me tender" by Elvis. I pulled the cheese ball crap and walked off stage and sung to her like those meatballs on American Idol. After I was done, the applause ensued and the hot ass 26 year old that I worked with and drooled over all summer comes up to me and literally tries to find out how my lunch tasted 8 hours earlier with her tongue. The rest of the night after we got back to camp could easily be written in Penthouse letters so I'll keep it clean. I was the talk of the camp the rest of the summer because I nailed her. I had designs on the woman from the bus but passing out tends to sort get in the way of closing the deal. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
twiley Posted January 9, 2008 Share Posted January 9, 2008 I had designs on the woman from the bus but passing out tends to sort get in the way of closing the deal. Wurd. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Egret Posted January 9, 2008 Share Posted January 9, 2008 I have no shame, and I have no problem making an ass of myself. One of my favorite times was a few years back. A couple of us were singing at the local watering hole. I decided to sing AC/DC's "Big Balls". At the end of the performance a mulletted, moustached, drunken man came up to me. He said, "That was the best Bon Scott that I've ever heard. I just wanted to shake your hand." So, I didn't get a standing ovation or the tongue of a hottie, but I did get the approval of mullet man. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
detlef Posted January 9, 2008 Author Share Posted January 9, 2008 I didn't get a standing ovation or the tongue of a hottie, but I did get the approval of mullet man. So you've got that going for you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bier Meister Posted January 9, 2008 Share Posted January 9, 2008 bier doesn't sing. ....it's really a community service. he makes an ass out himself in other ways. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DemonKnight Posted January 9, 2008 Share Posted January 9, 2008 I used to do kareoke all the time. My "hits" were U2 "One" and Radiohead "Creep". The last time I did kareoke was on my birthday about 4 years ago. A good buddy of mine was in a band and ran the open mic night at a local, very popular, bar downtown. Him and a bunch of people used to always go back to my house and jam after the bar closed since I lived right around the corner. Anywayz, I go stumbling into this bar on my birthday (which just happened to be open mic night) and my boy who runs the show called me up to sing "Creep" since it was a song we used to do back at my house. Keep in mind, this is all second hand info since I dont remember a lick of that night. We had been drinking very heavily all day long and I had probably eaten 2 bars over the course of the day (we were at the bar incidentally to get some "wake up"). I apparently was a complete mess almost stumbling off the stage, intelligble words, almost brawling with an off duty police man, being dragged out of the bar by the guys I was with and getting into an actuall fistfight with one of the dudes in the car on the way home. It took me a good long while to live that one down. Xanax and alcohol dont mix kiddies. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DemonKnight Posted January 9, 2008 Share Posted January 9, 2008 Excellent. My best and only moment happened when I was 18 and working at a summer camp as a counsler. The entire summer I was teamed up with this hot 26 year old assistant camp director which was OLD for me at the time and she always talked about how she had a guilty pleasure of listening to Elvis. Anyway - all of the camp counselors went out to the local town towards the end of the summer and got blasted at a bar that had kareoke. I was drunk enough to have the balls to get up on stage unprompted and sung a solo for "love me tender" by Elvis. I pulled the cheese ball crap and walked off stage and sung to her like those meatballs on American Idol. After I was done, the applause ensued and the hot ass 26 year old that I worked with and drooled over all summer comes up to me and literally tries to find out how my lunch tasted 8 hours earlier with her tongue. The rest of the night after we got back to camp could easily be written in Penthouse letters so I'll keep it clean. I was the talk of the camp the rest of the summer because I nailed her. Good times. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Savage Beatings Posted January 9, 2008 Share Posted January 9, 2008 Great stories! I tried the Star Spangled Banner once... totally mangled it, but had a room full of friends who were falling over themselves with laughter and applause... so I ended up winning a $50 bar tab. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
isleseeya Posted January 9, 2008 Share Posted January 9, 2008 1990 at twenty years old ..i am dating a girl who was friends with an owner of an exclsuive , high end Japanese bar / Karaoke joint in Manhattan we go and i end up getting smashed beyond repair drinking Scotch ... decide to go up there and sing Karaoke ..i ask them to leave the words on the screen in Japanese ...i end up screaming whatever lyrics i felt like ( i cant read Japanese ) and mixing up a bunch of songs together as soon as i am done i begin puking for almost an hour in the bathroom ...owner of the place comes oevr to me with a jar with white powder ( i kid you not ) and tells me to take a spoonful of the stuff ..i am so drunk i have no clue what to do so i take the spoonful within one minute i stop puking and woke up next day with no hang over ..to this day i have no idea what i took but wish i had my hands on it now Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
detlef Posted January 9, 2008 Author Share Posted January 9, 2008 Great stories! I tried the Star Spangled Banner once... totally mangled it, but had a room full of friends who were falling over themselves with laughter and applause... so I ended up winning a $50 bar tab. Sir, butchering the star spangled banner puts you in a not-so elite group with nearly everyone alive. At the risk of causing a riot among the "America, love it or leave it" crew, that's a really poorly written song. Just from the standpoint of the song itself, not what it freaking stands for. Of course, it's better than the Mexican anthem. I remember being at a USA Baseball exhibition game against them when they played it. My friend and I were looking at each thinking, "By god is that an awful freaking song" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
twiley Posted January 9, 2008 Share Posted January 9, 2008 1990 at twenty years old ..i am dating a girl who was friends with an owner of an exclsuive , high end Japanese bar / Karaoke joint in Manhattan we go and i end up getting smashed beyond repair drinking Scotch ... decide to go up there and sing Karaoke ..i ask them to leave the words on the screen in Japanese ...i end up screaming whatever lyrics i felt like ( i cant read Japanese ) and mixing up a bunch of songs together as soon as i am done i begin puking for almost an hour in the bathroom ...owner of the place comes oevr to me with a jar with white powder ( i kid you not ) and tells me to take a spoonful of the stuff ..i am so drunk i have no clue what to do so i take the spoonful within one minute i stop puking and woke up next day with no hang over ..to this day i have no idea what i took but wish i had my hands on it now Last time someone gave me a jar of white powder I was up for 5 days and totally reroofed the house. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Savage Beatings Posted January 9, 2008 Share Posted January 9, 2008 Sir, butchering the star spangled banner puts you in a not-so elite group with nearly everyone alive. At the risk of causing a riot among the "America, love it or leave it" crew, that's a really poorly written song. Just from the standpoint of the song itself, not what it freaking stands for. Of course, it's better than the Mexican anthem. I remember being at a USA Baseball exhibition game against them when they played it. My friend and I were looking at each thinking, "By god is that an awful freaking song" I love the song... and can sing it to perfection in my shower... but that night I got stuck on a really high octave and couldn't recover. It was like Tiny Tim trying to be patriotic. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rajncajn Posted January 9, 2008 Share Posted January 9, 2008 bier doesn't sing.....it's really a community service. he makes an ass out himself in other ways. +100000000000000000000 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
isleseeya Posted January 9, 2008 Share Posted January 9, 2008 Last time someone gave me a jar of white powder I was up for 5 days and totally reroofed the house. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skilly Posted January 10, 2008 Share Posted January 10, 2008 Four words: "Wanted Dead or Alive" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
budlitebrad Posted January 10, 2008 Share Posted January 10, 2008 Mack the Knife at a Christmas party last year. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
whomper Posted January 10, 2008 Share Posted January 10, 2008 I used to do kareoke all the time. My "hits" were U2 "One" and Radiohead "Creep". Could you hit the notes in the big finish ? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
General Itals Posted January 10, 2008 Share Posted January 10, 2008 (edited) Chapping two girl's azzes to Sir Mix-a-Lot's "Baby Got Back". Edited January 10, 2008 by General Itals Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
isleseeya Posted January 10, 2008 Share Posted January 10, 2008 i can sing Wonderful tonight by Clapton really well ...or at least the beers make me thinks so when i sing it Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kid Cid Posted January 10, 2008 Share Posted January 10, 2008 I tend not to sing Karaoke as a courtesy to other folks. The last time I did it I sang two songs over the course of the evening, the first was Come Sail Away by Styx and the second was Hocus Pocus by Focus (you've heard it even if you don't know the name). I tend to look for challenges and these were about the most challenging tunes I could find on the lists. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
detlef Posted January 10, 2008 Author Share Posted January 10, 2008 I'm also somewhat legendary at my wife's company for busting out a pretty good Jagger and doing "Miss You" at the first company retreat we attended with them. Not sure whether it speaks to the performance or whether there's just not much else to talk about. But it's been almost 4 years now and everytime I go to one of their parties, somebody makes a comment about how they need to find me a mic. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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