Scorcher Posted May 13, 2009 Share Posted May 13, 2009 I started at a hotel 1 year and 3 months ago. I have just been downsized. Instead of just saying you are let go because you make too much money, I was totally destroyed as a department manager. The hardest part about this whole dilemma is that my wife still works for the company in another department but every day when she comes home I have to hear about what is going on and who replaced me. Any advice? I just want to move on: but the economy and my wife won't let me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Double Agent Posted May 13, 2009 Share Posted May 13, 2009 Ask your wife to stop bringing it up. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Perchoutofwater Posted May 13, 2009 Share Posted May 13, 2009 Definitely have a talk with your wife about it and let her know that you don't want to hear about the guy that replaced you. I'd also suggest getting a job as a waiter or something while you look for another job, so that you are not just sitting around the house looking at classifieds all day feeling sorry for yourself. I have a friend that did the waiter thing while he was looking for a job, and one of the regular customers got to know him and ended up hiring him for a pretty good position. The point is don't just sit around a mope, get out and do something to earn a little money while you look for something better. The distraction will help as will the money. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scorcher Posted May 13, 2009 Author Share Posted May 13, 2009 It's hard to ask your wife not to talk about what she did all day. I really think I'm just jealous because she's still there and I am not. They regard her and they let me go. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
i_am_the_swammi Posted May 13, 2009 Share Posted May 13, 2009 We own/manage 23 hotels....what do you do, and where do you live? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scorcher Posted May 13, 2009 Author Share Posted May 13, 2009 Definitely have a talk with your wife about it and let her know that you don't want to hear about the guy that replaced you. I'd also suggest getting a job as a waiter or something while you look for another job, so that you are not just sitting around the house looking at classifieds all day feeling sorry for yourself. I have a friend that did the waiter thing while he was looking for a job, and one of the regular customers got to know him and ended up hiring him for a pretty good position. The point is don't just sit around a mope, get out and do something to earn a little money while you look for something better. The distraction will help as will the money. Thanks for a sincere reply. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scorcher Posted May 13, 2009 Author Share Posted May 13, 2009 (edited) We own/manage 23 hotels....what do you do, and where do you live? I was an F&B Director and I also served as interim general manager until they could find a replacement : I live in Huntsville Al. Edited May 13, 2009 by Scorcher Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alexgaddis Posted May 13, 2009 Share Posted May 13, 2009 Thanks for a sincere reply. And no mention of Obama or handouts... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scorcher Posted May 13, 2009 Author Share Posted May 13, 2009 And no mention of Obama or handouts... Funny you should bring that up because it was actually Obama who told me I should quit! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
whomper Posted May 13, 2009 Share Posted May 13, 2009 Since you were in Food and Beverage another stop gap job like Perch alluded to might be bartending. Good pocket money and a good chance to meet a lot of people and network. Good luck bro. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scorcher Posted May 13, 2009 Author Share Posted May 13, 2009 The saddest part and most illuminating for me is that I was always too busy to answer calls from my wife, children , and friends. I went to work at 6a.m. and got home at 11 p.m. Somehow I thought my income and pursuit of it would justify any thing I did. Now my company phone is gone, and my personal phone never rings. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dmarc117 Posted May 13, 2009 Share Posted May 13, 2009 The saddest part and most illuminating for me is that I was always too busy to answer calls from my wife, children , and friends. I went to work at 6a.m. and got home at 11 p.m. Somehow I thought my income and pursuit of it would justify any thing I did. Now my company phone is gone, and my personal phone never rings. sucks, but youre not gonna gain anything by sulking and feeling sorry for yourself. get out there and get another job! you sound qualified to do alot of different things! good luck! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scorcher Posted May 13, 2009 Author Share Posted May 13, 2009 sucks, but youre not gonna gain anything by sulking and feeling sorry for yourself. get out there and get another job! you sound qualified to do alot of different things! good luck! thanks , that's good advice. It just takes a little time to get over the shock of being bushwhacked and unemployed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bpwallace49 Posted May 13, 2009 Share Posted May 13, 2009 The saddest part and most illuminating for me is that I was always too busy to answer calls from my wife, children , and friends. I went to work at 6a.m. and got home at 11 p.m. Somehow I thought my income and pursuit of it would justify any thing I did. Now my company phone is gone, and my personal phone never rings. Scorcher that was the biggest transition for me too. I was the GM of a country club that got SMACKED by the recession and I was one of several top employees that got whacked. They now have a member doing my position for free. The lack of communication and phoce calls was deafening to me at first. I recommend getting out of the house and utilizing anyone in your professional network to meet to talk about opportunities and to stay focused. Try hcareers.com that is industry-specific for hospitality, and start looking around country clubs/ private clubs that tradtionally do NOT advertise for openings, but rely on word of mouth and specialized search engines. Lastly (at least in Chicago) there are open jobs for restaurant managers/GMs and hotel personnel every day on craigslist. Good luck in the search! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dmarc117 Posted May 13, 2009 Share Posted May 13, 2009 thanks , that's good advice. It just takes a little time to get over the shock of being bushwhacked and unemployed. i hear ya. was in a similar situation a few years ago. got involved in a ponzi scheme before they got hot. when i found out, wanted to go into the corner and curl up into a fetal position. took a few days, but realized wasnt gaining anything by sulking. you will get back on your feet in no time. actually might be a great opp to do something else. ya never know. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alexgaddis Posted May 13, 2009 Share Posted May 13, 2009 It just takes a little time to get over the shock of being bushwhacked. i don't think he is quite over it yet... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Big John Posted May 13, 2009 Share Posted May 13, 2009 i don't think he is quite over it yet... He has only 1 "h" in his name. And sorry scorcher, that is a real bummer. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chargerz Posted May 13, 2009 Share Posted May 13, 2009 I don't have any additional advice, but I wanted to say that I'm sorry you lost your job. That's tough to take. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
westvirginia Posted May 13, 2009 Share Posted May 13, 2009 Scorcher, the advice in this thread is sound. Take a day just to sulk, be angry and get it all out of your system. After that, getting your next gig becomes your full-time job. Like folks said, wait tables or bartend in the meanwhile, but be productive. Just as sloth begats more sloth, industry does the same. Go for it! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
muck Posted May 13, 2009 Share Posted May 13, 2009 Go get some sunshine. That Vitamin D does wonders for your mood... Oh, and definately talk to your wife. And, use this as an opportunity to reconsider what you feel is your most important role ... is it "businessperson" or "dad/husband" and use that to guide your vocational pursuits. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Double Agent Posted May 13, 2009 Share Posted May 13, 2009 It's hard to ask your wife not to talk about what she did all day. You'd be surprised. I prefer to keep most of my work at the office. I'm self-employed so it's impossible to completely get away. But I really don't like talking about work at home. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HowboutthemCowboys Posted May 13, 2009 Share Posted May 13, 2009 The saddest part and most illuminating for me is that I was always too busy to answer calls from my wife, children , and friends. I went to work at 6a.m. and got home at 11 p.m. Somehow I thought my income and pursuit of it would justify any thing I did. Now my company phone is gone, and my personal phone never rings. Take the free time you have now to reconnect with the kids that you did'nt have time for before. They're only young once. Never saw a gravestone that said " I wish I'd spent more time at work". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Double Agent Posted May 13, 2009 Share Posted May 13, 2009 The saddest part and most illuminating for me is that I was always too busy to answer calls from my wife, children , and friends. I went to work at 6a.m. and got home at 11 p.m. Somehow I thought my income and pursuit of it would justify any thing I did. Now my company phone is gone, and my personal phone never rings. This may be a big blessing in disguise. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
untateve Posted May 13, 2009 Share Posted May 13, 2009 You'd be surprised. I prefer to keep most of my work at the office. I'm self-employed so it's impossible to completely get away. But I really don't like talking about work at home. +1. I almost never discuss my work at home. I hope all works out for you, Scorcher. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
H8tank Posted May 13, 2009 Share Posted May 13, 2009 I went to work at 6a.m. and got home at 11 p.m. What a freaking present! Life is about LIVING, not WORKING!!! Your avatar is porno for detleaf. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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