tonorator Posted December 20, 2009 Share Posted December 20, 2009 this one floored me Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
isleseeya Posted December 20, 2009 Share Posted December 20, 2009 this one floored me wow that crushed me ...very , very sad Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gilthorp Posted December 20, 2009 Share Posted December 20, 2009 (edited) Thanks for the pick me up. So nice of you to post that picture. Not sure I see the point. Yes, it is very sad. Edited December 20, 2009 by gilthorp Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tonorator Posted December 20, 2009 Author Share Posted December 20, 2009 not sure why i posted it ... probably shouldn't have. didn't mean to be a downer ... it just hit me hard and summed up everything there is to for the ultimate sacrifice our soldiers make for their country. don't know the family or the story, but it makes my heart ache. as i get older, i struggle more and more with deploying our young men and women, sons and daughters, mothers and fathers, to faraway places to fight wars where the enemy is not clear to see and victory is hard to define. anthony campbell dies diffusing a freakin' bomb rigged up by a bunch of people with no regard for human life. he had a family, 3 kids, was a police officer, and he's dead now because some a-hole rigged up a bomb and walked away. why just not give the country a week to clear out and then nuke the whole damned place ... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grimm74 Posted December 20, 2009 Share Posted December 20, 2009 I am not sure what his point is either but does that matter? That photo crushed me as well. The photo tonight reminds me to be a better husband, father, and friend. On top of that it tells me to be apart of the solution and not the problem. I thank you all who have served! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Double Agent Posted December 20, 2009 Share Posted December 20, 2009 If that photo is real...who the f would let their kid see their dad like that? Very disturbing on so many levels. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
budlitebrad Posted December 20, 2009 Share Posted December 20, 2009 If that photo is real...who the f would let their kid see their dad like that? Very disturbing on so many levels. That's why I'm getting cremated. My kids can launch my remains into Lake George with a potato cannon or something, so they can at least have a little fun with it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grimm74 Posted December 20, 2009 Share Posted December 20, 2009 If that photo is real...who the f would let their kid see their dad like that? Very disturbing on so many levels. I am going to guess you are not a parent. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Double Agent Posted December 20, 2009 Share Posted December 20, 2009 I am going to guess you are not a parent. Wrong...I have two. And sorry...but if something happens to my wife (and my kids are that young), they are not seeing their mom's dead body. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ursa Majoris Posted December 20, 2009 Share Posted December 20, 2009 as i get older, i struggle more and more with deploying our young men and women, sons and daughters, mothers and fathers, to faraway places to fight wars where the enemy is not clear to see and victory is hard to define. +1 but there are occasions when war is necessary. I do think too many people are insulated from the reality of war though. A constitutional amendment mandating a no-exceptions draft for any war declaration would concentrate our population's minds wonderfully. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Clubfoothead Posted December 20, 2009 Share Posted December 20, 2009 Disturbing on so many levels. My favorite picture was taken the day of my grandfather's funeral. It's was taken by my ex-aunt's current boyfriend. It's my Dad holding up my oldest daughter back when she was 2ish in the back yard at the post-funeral party. I've flipped through all of my albums, no pictures of the bodies of any of my dead relatives. No pictures of anyone standing over a casket. So who was taking these pictures? What family memeber signed the release of the photos and for what reason? I'm not judging the decision to do so, just wonder what the family's reason was - there must have been one. He looks suprisingly good for someone blown up defusing a bomb. I have no forensic training. In some ways, you can feel thankful the poor girl is so young. Her life will never be the same but she'll probably grow up with no memories of life before her father died. She will miss the father everyone tells her about. Same picture of an 8-12 year old kid would be even worse because those kids have clear recollection of before and after. They will understand there's no reason to reach out for Daddy because he's not coming back. Best case scenario is eventually the wife finds someone else who makes her happy, treats her nice and raises the kid as their own, right? I know if I die tomorrow that's what I would want for my wife and daughters. So in the after life or in heaven or wherever, do you have to see all that? I want it to happen but I don't want to be able to see it. Someone else doing my wife, playing with my girls. Or your wife cannot recover, turns into a meth whore and the kids get taken by the state. I'd choose the first but would not want to see the gory details of either. That kind of makes me hope it's just over when I die. I don't know him. I hope he was a good man to his family as well as the people he served. You don't have to a good guy to be dead of war. Disturbing. Mainly, I hope he is able to rest in peace. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tonorator Posted December 20, 2009 Author Share Posted December 20, 2009 He looks suprisingly good for someone blown up defusing a bomb. I have no forensic training. this pic wasn't of anthony campbell. i was just referring to him in general. don't know who this family is ... it was on digg with a title "the wages of war" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grimm74 Posted December 20, 2009 Share Posted December 20, 2009 Wrong...I have two. And sorry...but if something happens to my wife (and my kids are that young), they are not seeing their mom's dead body. That is one's opinion. Just as disturbing as UFC? I for one will be cremated and dropped at sea. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rebellab Posted December 20, 2009 Share Posted December 20, 2009 Let me state, that I am not a parent. I have worked very closely with families in situations like this one. Not a soldier, but accidents etc. I am not sure of the age of the little girl. With all that said, I encouraged families to let young children see the deceased. They understand far more than we give them credit for. As I stated above, I am not sure of the age, and each child is different. I watched two little boys view their father who was killed in an auto accident. He looked ok, but their mother wanted them to say good bye. She took each of them up with here separately. If I remember 3 and 5 were their ages. Each child had questions that I answered and so did their mom. The minister had very good books geared for children in these situations. Through it all they understood to the best of their ability at their age. They most importantly were not told that their dad was sleeping, that is a huge mistake. Viewing is a very important part of the grieving process. We are visual and tactual as a being. Whether that viewing takes place in the hospital, nursing home, or home immediately following the death, or at the funeral home doesn't seem to matter. When people see a person lifeless or feels that they are cool to the touch we can understand better the concept of death. Everyone has their opinions, but I see nothing wrong with what is taking place in this photo. I am concerned on who took it and how it ended up on the web. In my state it is illegal to take photos of the deceased with out written permission from family. Often I would ask families that brought a camera, what they would be doing with the photos. I wasn't being nosy, I just wanted them to think about where would they store the photos, at what time would they pull them out, so really what is the purpose of the photo. It is definately not something that you hang on the fridge. Families often thanked me for bringing this up. We took photos of the flowers etc, but never of the casket or deceased. Many of you have stated that you are going to do this or that when you die. To a certain extent, this is your decision, but keep in mind that it is your wife, husband, children that will be left to mourn you death. They are the ones that need to decide what they need as far as services, viewing to continue on in their life following their death. Please keep them in mind as you make those decisions. Absolutely everyone should have these discussions with their families. You love them and they love you let them have a little say in what they will need. Back the the photo,it is sad, but I am not going to say that it is terrible for a child to see that. I am encouraged that her mother feels it is a necessary process for her. I would rather answer questions of why it happened before burial or cremation than to try and explain when everything is done. My You can all bash me for my opinions, but I was pretty close to situations like this one for 15 years. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Double Agent Posted December 20, 2009 Share Posted December 20, 2009 That is one's opinion. Just as disturbing as UFC? I for one will be cremated and dropped at sea. I guess to some people the UFC is as disturbing as having a parent die. Not to me but maybe to some. And my 3 year old doesn't watch the UFC. Good post Rebellab. I do think viewing the body and a funeral is very important for the grieving process. But I don't agree with a child this age seeing a dead body. Just my opinion. I can only do what I think is best for my kids. But I would think it would really do more harm than good to my 3 year old. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wiegie Posted December 20, 2009 Share Posted December 20, 2009 But I don't agree with a child this age seeing a dead body. Just my opinion. I can only do what I think is best for my kids. But I would think it would really do more harm than good to my 3 year old. A great-aunt of mine that I was very close died over the summer. I took both my 3 year-old and my 2 year-old up to the casket with me. They were not harmed by it at all. I just explained that my aunt had died. (What was sort of amusing in a way that my aunt would have appreciated is that a little bit later in the wake, my mom (for some unknown reason) came up to my 3 year-old and told him that my deceased aunt was happy that he was there... to which my son replied, "Is she not still in that box up there?". To cap it off, about two days later my son wanted to go outside barefoot and I told him that he had better be careful or else he might step on a bee and it could sting him. That didn't seem to bother him too much, so I further added that if he stepped on a bee that the bee would die. My son then said, "Yes, and we would have to get a tiny tiny box to put it in.") As for the original picture, it is sad, but as was mentioned before, I think it would have been even worse if the child had been a little bit older. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grimm74 Posted December 21, 2009 Share Posted December 21, 2009 I guess to some people the UFC is as disturbing as having a parent die. Not to me but maybe to some. And my 3 year old doesn't watch the UFC. Good post Rebellab. I do think viewing the body and a funeral is very important for the grieving process. But I don't agree with a child this age seeing a dead body. Just my opinion. I can only do what I think is best for my kids. But I would think it would really do more harm than good to my 3 year old. Do not get me wrong Agent I would not want my daughter to see me like that either, but I cannot say it is disturbing... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BeeR Posted December 21, 2009 Share Posted December 21, 2009 Thanks for the pick me up. So nice of you to post that picture. Not sure I see the point. Yes, it is very sad. So when someone makes a thread saying "one of the saddest pictures" and goes "just crushed me very sad" you expected what, kittens batting some yarn around? Re. the viewing thing, there's no right/wrong, all personal pref. Agree it should be talked about w/family NOW though, not "later" cuz that day might not come. Same with wills, etc. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cre8tiff Posted December 21, 2009 Share Posted December 21, 2009 That's why I'm getting cremated. My kids can launch my remains into Lake George with a potato cannon or something, so they can at least have a little fun with it. The potato cannon is a great touch. I may have to borrow that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tazinib1 Posted December 21, 2009 Share Posted December 21, 2009 US military casualties as of today in Iraq: 4371 US military casualties as of today in Afghanistan: 936 God bless our troops and the families of those that have given there life for us. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
whomper Posted December 21, 2009 Share Posted December 21, 2009 So when someone makes a thread saying "one of the saddest pictures" and goes "just crushed me very sad" you expected what, kittens batting some yarn around? Re. the viewing thing, there's no right/wrong, all personal pref. Agree it should be talked about w/family NOW though, not "later" cuz that day might not come. Same with wills, etc. In fairness, Tone can be sarcastic at times. I knew the possibility of it being a heart wrenching picture was there but I also thought it may have been a joke Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scooby Posted December 22, 2009 Share Posted December 22, 2009 yes, so very sad, and my friend who lost her twins due to preeclampsia/preemie births just a few months ago, her hubby was sent to Iraq right after Thanksgiving for an entire year...the sacrifices these military families have to make is unbelievable. I pray for all Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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