Cunning Runt Posted August 16, 2011 Share Posted August 16, 2011 My wife teaches at a large HS (graduating classes are usually in between 500-600) and the chool usually fields good sports' teams - state ranked. She wants our kids to go there. Thing is - I'm 5'9 and my wife is 5'2. Our kids are not going to be the biggest kids in the world. They're very good athletes, but in a school that size, and racist or not, they bus a bunch of inner-city kids to the school - I just don't see them making an impact in sports. My personal feeling is that I would rather my kids go to a smaller school where they have a much better chance of starting and really contributing on their school's teams rather than maybe riding the pine. I know they'll be good enough to make the team at the bigger schools, but when you're gonna be a 5'9 white kid, how much playing time are you gonna get? Not much I don't think. Is it wrong for me to want my kids go to a smaller school (assume the educations are comparable) so they can make more of a name for themselves and and actually play? This came up this morning at home and actually got a little heated. That's the brunt of the disagreement - a couple other caveats are these: If a smaller school were the choice, we would likely move to a smaller community with not as much to do and she would have to commute to her job quite a bit longer. On the flip side, we would move to a place on a lake which is something we've always wanted as well. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rajncajn Posted August 16, 2011 Share Posted August 16, 2011 Just my , but I think you're sending the wrong message to your kids by doing that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Savage Beatings Posted August 16, 2011 Share Posted August 16, 2011 You would move your entire family and tick off your wife, on the off chance that your kids might earn a starting role on a sports team at a smaller school? Without having any other details I'm going to go ahead and agree with your wife on this one. If your kids are that passionate about sports, then why don't you inspire them to work twice as hard against tougher competition at the larger school. Maybe they won't be able to overcome their physical limitations, but if they can, then their accomplishments will mean that much more. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cunning Runt Posted August 16, 2011 Author Share Posted August 16, 2011 Just my , but I think you're sending the wrong message to your kids by doing that. Thanks. I do respectfully disagree. I think it's trying to create more opportunities for them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Azazello1313 Posted August 16, 2011 Share Posted August 16, 2011 1) your kids should be in sports they excel in. maybe they're not cut out to be a power forward or an o-lineman. but a point guard or a CB? why not. and of course there are other sports, soccer, wrestling, etc. 2) if you want your kid to get the best academic education, do you send them to a small crappy school so their class rank will be higher? 3) this should not the primary criteria by which you choose your kid's school. and it sounds like, in your mind if not your wife's, it is. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Big Country Posted August 16, 2011 Share Posted August 16, 2011 Thanks. I do respectfully disagree. I think it's trying to create more opportunities for them. Sounds like your telling them that in the face of a challenge to run away and find easier competition. To move away for the sole rason of finding a smaller school so your kids have a better chance of making a sports team seems silly. Based on your own comments, it doesn;t sound like they are looking at D1 scholarships or pro careers - if they were, you'd see them as in line to make an impact at the larger school. What do your kids want? What school are their friends most likely going to? Are you looking to move them away from all of their friends, etc. just on the off chance that they have a better opportunity in sports? What if they decide they don;t want to play the sport, or what if they aren't starters at the smaller school? What's better - starter on a crappy team or solid role player on a state championship team, what do you think they will remember more? I guess you need to determine if you are looking at this objectively or if you are looking at this moe for you as a way to brag about how much your children may possibly be contributing to a team? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cunning Runt Posted August 16, 2011 Author Share Posted August 16, 2011 I've always felt a smaller school allows a kid to not get lost in the shuffle. In all kinds of ways. Sports is just one of the obvious ones. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cunning Runt Posted August 16, 2011 Author Share Posted August 16, 2011 Sounds like your telling them that in the face of a challenge to run away and find easier competition. To move away for the sole rason of finding a smaller school so your kids have a better chance of making a sports team seems silly. Based on your own comments, it doesn;t sound like they are looking at D1 scholarships or pro careers - if they were, you'd see them as in line to make an impact at the larger school. What do your kids want? What school are their friends most likely going to? Are you looking to move them away from all of their friends, etc. just on the off chance that they have a better opportunity in sports? What if they decide they don;t want to play the sport, or what if they aren't starters at the smaller school? What's better - starter on a crappy team or solid role player on a state championship team, what do you think they will remember more? I guess you need to determine if you are looking at this objectively or if you are looking at this moe for you as a way to brag about how much your children may possibly be contributing to a team? You're off base. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wildcat2334 Posted August 16, 2011 Share Posted August 16, 2011 You would move your entire family and tick off your wife, on the off chance that your kids might earn a starting role on a sports team at a smaller school? Without having any other details I'm going to go ahead and agree with your wife on this one. If your kids are that passionate about sports, then why don't you inspire them to work twice as hard against tougher competition at the larger school. Maybe they won't be able to overcome their physical limitations, but if they can, then their accomplishments will mean that much more. agreed - besides planty of smaller kids excel in sports in HS I know plenty of HS "athletes' that switched schools to have a better chance to play, and it never seems to turn out very well. As cool as HS sports are, they shouldn't be a top priority IMO Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
twiley Posted August 16, 2011 Share Posted August 16, 2011 Based on your response to everyone's advice it appears you're just looking for some sort of validation which you're not getting. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cunning Runt Posted August 16, 2011 Author Share Posted August 16, 2011 Based on your response to everyone's advice it appears you're just looking for some sort of validation which you're not getting. You're right. I'm not. I'll drop it and feel the way I feel in solitude. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
matt770 Posted August 16, 2011 Share Posted August 16, 2011 1) your kids should be in sports they excel in. maybe they're not cut out to be a power forward or an o-lineman. but a point guard or a CB? why not. and of course there are other sports, soccer, wrestling, etc. 2) if you want your kid to get the best academic education, do you send them to a small crappy school so their class rank will be higher? 3) this should not the primary criteria by which you choose your kid's school. and it sounds like, in your mind if not your wife's, it is. Yeah, I'd be looking at test scores and such way ahead of anything having to do with sports. Expose your kids to everything from football to chess to violin to badminton and just sit back and see what they like. Don't freak out if they suddenly change their minds. They're kids. You want them to discover their passion, whatever it might be. It's not about deciding from birth that you are going to develop the next great ______, unless you want really stressed and unhappy kids. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Big Country Posted August 16, 2011 Share Posted August 16, 2011 You're off base. So these are potential D1 scholarship/pro level athletes? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
irish Posted August 16, 2011 Share Posted August 16, 2011 Just my , but I think you're sending the wrong message to your kids by doing that. You would move your entire family and tick off your wife, on the off chance that your kids might earn a starting role on a sports team at a smaller school? Without having any other details I'm going to go ahead and agree with your wife on this one. If your kids are that passionate about sports, then why don't you inspire them to work twice as hard against tougher competition at the larger school. Maybe they won't be able to overcome their physical limitations, but if they can, then their accomplishments will mean that much more. Agree completely here. You leave your kids in the larger school with the greater competition. I mean isn't that what life is going to be like when they get out into the real world and are looking for jobs? It's a rat race at every level and the faster they learn that and the more experience they have with managing through it, raising the bar and performing better, the better equipped they'll be. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
matt770 Posted August 16, 2011 Share Posted August 16, 2011 I'm going to write several pages of my observations about obsessive parents and create a mantra that I will chant each and every morning as soon as my wife tests positive for rugrat. Consider that completely neglected kids often find an inner fire to rise above their circumstances and become high achievers, just as often as micromanaged kids often reach college age and find they can't function without mommy reminding them to go to class. Give your kids as many opportunities as you can, coach, encourage, but mostly get out of their way. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rajncajn Posted August 16, 2011 Share Posted August 16, 2011 Sounds like your telling them that in the face of a challenge to run away and find easier competition. Not to mention telling them that they aren't good enough to compete against the "inner city" kids. I've always felt a smaller school allows a kid to not get lost in the shuffle. In all kinds of ways. Sports is just one of the obvious ones. That's totally up to the kids themselves. If they have the type of personality that they shy away from others then it won't really matter how small the school is. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cunning Runt Posted August 16, 2011 Author Share Posted August 16, 2011 Agree completely here. You leave your kids in the larger school with the greater competition. I mean isn't that what life is going to be like when they get out into the real world and are looking for jobs? It's a rat race at every level and the faster they learn that and the more experience they have with managing through it, raising the bar and performing better, the better equipped they'll be. I want what's best for my kids. That said, I do strongly disagree with the opinions I've heard. I think they would enjoy high school much more in a smaller environment. For lots of reasons. Sports being one of them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rajncajn Posted August 16, 2011 Share Posted August 16, 2011 I'm going to write several pages of my observations about obsessive parents and create a mantra that I will chant each and every morning as soon as my wife tests positive for rugrat. Consider that completely neglected kids often find an inner fire to rise above their circumstances and become high achievers, just as often as micromanaged kids often reach college age and find they can't function without mommy reminding them to go to class. Give your kids as many opportunities as you can, coach, encourage, but mostly get out of their way. You'll still Ginsu up trying not to be like other parents. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Azazello1313 Posted August 16, 2011 Share Posted August 16, 2011 Consider that completely neglected kids often find an inner fire to rise above their circumstances and become high achievers either that or they become strippers and drug addicts. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bier Meister Posted August 16, 2011 Share Posted August 16, 2011 i would put an emphasis on which provides a better education, but also allows opportunities for extracurricular activities.... i would also want my child to get pt vs bench if she were to play sports Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
matt770 Posted August 16, 2011 Share Posted August 16, 2011 I want what's best for my kids. That said, I do strongly disagree with the opinions I've heard. I think they would enjoy high school much more in a smaller environment. For lots of reasons. Sports being one of them. In a larger school, they are more likely to be exposed to a wider diversity of people, which is what they will encounter is the real world. They will have a wider variety of friends to choose from. They may be inspired to aim a little higher to stand out above the crowd too. Or they could drown in anonymity and become withdrawn and depressed. In a smaller school they may get more attention than they want and wish they could blend in to the background, thus becoming withdrawn and depressed. Or more likely, they will adapt to their environment as most kids do pretty well. Probably the most important thing you can do is pick the best school district and stay there until they graduate hs so they have stability and long lasting friendships. The size of the school probably means jack sh*t to their ultimate success in life. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brentastic Posted August 16, 2011 Share Posted August 16, 2011 I think everyone is being too hard on CR. There's something called confidence that can make all the difference in the world to a child who doesn't know any better. I'm not saying I completely agree with his plan but I also don't think it's nearly as insane as some of you judgemental pricks are implying. CR is right in that small schools offer more opportunity in many cases. Sitting on the bench can discourage a kid and hinder his confidence. Of course every individual is different and maybe in the face of adversity your kids will try harder and thrive - maybe not. There is not an absolute answer here as to what direction is right. As far as the argument that CR is sending the wrong message - BAH. Whatever. First of all, they don't have to know all the reasons for the switch. But even if they do understand why, they may appreciate the fact that dad went out of his way to make their lives better and give them more opportunity to shine. Bottom line: I'm not saying what I would do in that situation because it's a tough call but to act as if CR is way out of line is just wrong. So many on here are so judgemental, it's just ridiculous. The man asks for some input and gets flamed. At the end of the day, CR can only do what he thinks is best for his children and I'm guessing he understands his children more than any of you bastages. Leave the guy alone and if you don't agree with his position, use some tact for god's sake! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
irish Posted August 16, 2011 Share Posted August 16, 2011 I want what's best for my kids. That said, I do strongly disagree with the opinions I've heard. I think they would enjoy high school much more in a smaller environment. For lots of reasons. Sports being one of them. I understand you wanting the best for them and having a different opinion from those here and that's what makes the world go round. At the end of the day, you are their father and in conjunction with their mother, need to make the best decisions you can for your kids. I hope it works out either way. I would just be mindful that you don't coddle and smother them. Good Luck with the wifee and making this decision. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Savage Beatings Posted August 16, 2011 Share Posted August 16, 2011 Leave the guy alone and if you don't agree with his position, use some tact for god's sake! Wait a minute. He's the one who came here asking us for our opinions. He just doesn't like that the majority of us don't agree with his line of reasoning. Nobody is questioning that he wants what is best for his kids. But if you ask for feedback, you have to be willing to accept that it might not all be positive. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jackass Posted August 16, 2011 Share Posted August 16, 2011 What do your kids want? This is the important question. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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