Maybe the dumbest thing I've been told

[detlef]

I got a phone call the other day by someone looking fora table of 8 for Friday night at 7pm. Thing is, we were absolutely booked until at least 8:30 or 9:00. I explained that I was sorry but would not be able to take her until that time.

 

"Oh, that's way too late."

"I completely understand. It's just that I'm completely booked until then."

 

Now, here's where she busted a line that I would like to suggest you never try if you're looking to change the mind of the host.

 

"Would it help if I mentioned that we were 2 adults and 6 young children?"

 

 

I didn't know what to say. The first thing that came to mind was, "Well since history shows that it's nearly a certainty that you'll be spending a fraction of what we'd expect from a normal table your size, it will take the waiter 30 minutes to navigate the menu with you to accommodate the sheltered diets of your hellyans, at least one of your kids is bound to have a fit that you may or may not actually properly deal with by removing the child from the room, and I'll have to declare the entire region a superfund site and take 30 minutes scraping the rice off the chairs and floors once you leave, I'll do everything humanly possible to make room for you, even if that means displacing another reservation or two."

 

Fortunately, all I had to say was, "Again, I'm sorry, but I'm completely booked until 8:30" and that was that. I just can't, for the life of me, think of what she was trying to accomplish.

[KevinL]

Fortunately, all I had to say was, "Again, I'm sorry, but I'm completely booked until 8:30" and that was that. I just can't, for the life of me, think of what she was trying to accomplish.

 

That is a good one!

 

I would have to guess that she thought you might have pity, realize that kids won't wait until 9 to eat, and put them at the 7pm spot Then you should shift someone else back to the 8:30 spot who was older and more mature and would be more patient in waiting.

 

Some people only think of themselves and give no consideration to how others might be affected.

[paulzale]

She was simply trying to say that they wouldn't need as much space as 8 adults would.

 

Perhaps you should let patrons know that you prefer to not have kids?

 

What he said!

[Big Country]

That is a good one!

 

I would have to guess that she thought you might have pity, realize that kids won't wait until 9 to eat, and put them at the 7pm spot Then you should shift someone else back to the 8:30 spot who was older and more mature and would be more patient in waiting.

 

Some people only think of themselves and give no consideration to how others might be affected.

 

 

But, on the other hand, why would he displace a customer that had already made a reservation to accomodate this person. If this person had made reservations earlier and had a spot, I would not expect detlef to give up their spot if someone else called in requesting the time slot, unless of course it was me and I was requesting the Huddler Special.

[Savage Beatings]

She was simply trying to say that they wouldn't need as much space as 8 adults would.

 

Perhaps you should let patrons know that you prefer to not have kids?

 

 

I'm with detlef on this one. I love my kids but they certainly do not make it easier on servers when we go out. That's just a fact. They order off the kids menu and need to be entertained during our stay. That doesn't mean he doesn't want kids there.

[detlef]

She was simply trying to say that they wouldn't need as much space as 8 adults would.

 

Perhaps you should let patrons know that you prefer to not have kids?

Do we get to put two of them in each chair? I'm not sure about most restaurants but our tables and chairs are the size they are. Whether there's a small person or a large person in them they take up the space they do. None the less, this is probably what she was going for. It still barely changes the absurdity of the attempt.

 

As for not wanting kids in my restaurant. I'll give it to you straight, they're a necessary evil. Obviously I would love it if people never brought their kids in. There's not a person in my industry that would say otherwise from a business standpoint. They make the mess of 4 people and don't spend any money. And then there's the screaming.

 

That said, this is not about me telling a woman she can't bring her kids into my place, nor is it about me pretending I'm full to avoid it. It's about me, or anyone bending over backwards to make room for a table of small children where they weren't going to for a table of adults. It simply makes no sense at all.

Edited November 9, 2010 by detlef

[paulzale]

Do we get to put two of them in each chair? I'm not sure about most restaurants but our tables and chairs are the size they are. Whether there's a small person or a large person in them they take up the space they do. None the less, this is probably what she was going for. It still barely changes the absurdity of the attempt.

 

I understand, but most people are not that logical, I believe she really thought they would take up less space and you could squeeze them in somewhere. I tend to eat at bars where no one under 21 is allowed

[redrumjuice]

The heartless cruelty you displayed in the story you told has got to be a thing of fiction. I couldn't for the life of me imagine a scenario where you would treat the request of a person truly attempting to simply be a good woman and steward of the community you live in with such absurd hatred and disgust.

 

Because there is a slight possibility the tale you have told has even a slight shred of truthfulness, I have reported you to not only the mods here, but also the local Chamber of Commerce in your area, as well as a 'thumbs down' emoticon on the review in the phone book online.

 

Shame on you.

[Perchoutofwater]

Next summer I think I'll take my kids and all 16 nieces and nephews on vacation. We may have to stop by and visit your fine establishment. I'll make train the young ones that are just learning to talk to say "Is it hot enough for ya."

 

All kidding aside, I used to wait tables when I was in college to pick up some extra cash, and I hated waiting on tables with a bunch of kids.

[detlef]

The heartless cruelty you displayed in the story you told has got to be a thing of fiction. I couldn't for the life of me imagine a scenario where you would treat the request of a person truly attempting to simply be a good woman and steward of the community you live in with such absurd hatred and disgust.

 

Because there is a slight possibility the tale you have told has even a slight shred of truthfulness, I have reported you to not only the mods here, but also the local Chamber of Commerce in your area, as well as a 'thumbs down' emoticon on the review in the phone book online.

 

Shame on you.

You're much funnier when you just say the stupid things that naturally come to you than you are when you try to be funny.

 

FYI

[redrumjuice]

Do you have the little pieces of toast without crust that people dip into fondue?

[untateve]

As for not wanting kids in my restaurant. I'll give it to you straight, they're a necessary evil. Obviously I would love it if people never brought their kids in. There's not a person in my industry that would say otherwise from a business standpoint. They make the mess of 4 people and don't spend any money. And then there's the screaming.

 

There is a local restaurant, Charles E. Fromage, that loves when children are presented for dining.

[Caveman_Nick]

Do you have the little pieces of toast without crust that people dip into fondue?

 

 

 

This never gets less funny. Whodathunkit...toast jokes.

[matt770]

Do we get to put two of them in each chair? I'm not sure about most restaurants but our tables and chairs are the size they are. Whether there's a small person or a large person in them they take up the space they do. None the less, this is probably what she was going for. It still barely changes the absurdity of the attempt.

 

As for not wanting kids in my restaurant. I'll give it to you straight, they're a necessary evil. Obviously I would love it if people never brought their kids in. There's not a person in my industry that would say otherwise from a business standpoint. They make the mess of 4 people and don't spend any money. And then there's the screaming.

 

That said, this is not about me telling a woman she can't bring her kids into my place, nor is it about me pretending I'm full to avoid it. It's about me, or anyone bending over backwards to make room for a table of small children where they weren't going to for a table of adults. It simply makes no sense at all.

 

I love kids as much as anyone, but it seems that most parents don't discipline their kids and act like they deserve a free pass when their kids act up in public. Can't say how many times I've been in a restaurant or other public place where a kid has misbehaved and the parent looks around and shrugs as if to say "Hey, they're kids, what do you want from me?", if they have any reaction at all. When I was little I knew how I was expected to behave in public. If I forgot, I was quickly reminded.

 

What's worse is the idiot parents who take infants and toddlers to the MOVIE THEATER of all places. Maybe 5 years ago it was unheard of, now I can say it has happened 8 out of the last 10 trips to the movies, easily. I'd love to know why and exactly when the switch that controls common courtesy and decency was flipped off.

[Big Country]

What's worse is the idiot parents who take infants and toddlers to the MOVIE THEATER of all places. Maybe 5 years ago it was unheard of, now I can say it has happened 8 out of the last 10 trips to the movies, easily. I'd love to know why and exactly when the switch that controls common courtesy and decency was flipped off.

 

 

This...I'll take my kids to Disney movies, etc., but that's about it. And I let them know they are expected to behave, which means not talking during the movie and definitely not running up anddown the stairs, etc. Amazes me how many people let their kids do this.

 

I have walked out of a movie before due to my son's behavior, though it didn't help that the people seated next to us were letting their kid do these very things, swinging and climbing on the railing etc. My son learned that just because other parents let their kids act that way doesn't mean he will be allowed to.

[evil_gop_liars]

The heartless cruelty you displayed in the story you told has got to be a thing of fiction. I couldn't for the life of me imagine a scenario where you would treat the request of a person truly attempting to simply be a good woman and steward of the community you live in with such absurd hatred and disgust.

 

Because there is a slight possibility the tale you have told has even a slight shred of truthfulness, I have reported you to not only the mods here, but also the local Chamber of Commerce in your area, as well as a 'thumbs down' emoticon on the review in the phone book online.

 

Shame on you.

 

 

You're much funnier when you just say the stupid things that naturally come to you than you are when you try to be funny.

 

FYI

 

 

I thought it was funny.

[detlef]

FWIW, we actually do a dinner event about once a month or so that is specifically aimed at families with kids. Our private room has a large flat screen TV and we show kids movies down there. So, you book a table, bring your kids, and the parents eat in relative peace while their kids eat quesadillas and watch the flick. Meanwhile, everyone in the room knows the drill. Nobody is down there celebrating their anniversary having to endure someone else's child flipping out 10 feet from them.

 

So, I actually do make an effort to welcome families on some realistic terms besides obviously never turning families away if I do have a spot for them.

 

There's also this older lady who runs a "day care" right across the street from our restaurant (and walking distance from about 4 other restaurants). She's open from 6-9pm on weekends and parents can drop their kids off while they dine out. She has a jumpy room and all sorts of games and crafts for them to do. Really a cool idea.

 

I should also add, and I think I brought this up before, that many parents are bloody annoying. At one of my places, we have an open kitchen bar and it's a great place to seat families with small kids. Mostly because we have these big woks that make huge flames and the kids are just spellbound watching. Also, it's a louder place so it's way less of a big deal if the kids get antsy (which they don't anyway because they're too busy watching the cooks). I always suggest that to people with kids for these reasons and those with more sense than self-righteousness end up taking my suggestion and later thanking me because it was the first meal out they've had in months where they didn't have to constantly deal with their kids. Of course, most take it as an insult and demand to be sat in the main dining room where they can waste their good money on food they're too busy scolding their kids to eat and, quite likely will have wrapped up to eat at home later once one of their kids goes ballistic and they need to make a hasty get away.

[matt770]

This...I'll take my kids to Disney movies, etc., but that's about it. And I let them know they are expected to behave, which means not talking during the movie and definitely not running up anddown the stairs, etc. Amazes me how many people let their kids do this.

 

I have walked out of a movie before due to my son's behavior, though it didn't help that the people seated next to us were letting their kid do these very things, swinging and climbing on the railing etc. My son learned that just because other parents let their kids act that way doesn't mean he will be allowed to.

 

Last movie my wife and I saw was The Town, rated R. Two infants in the theater. They didn't seem impressed by Ben Affleck's performance.

[wiegie]

"Would it help if I mentioned that we were 2 adults and 6 young children?"

I would have found it extremely hard not to laugh out loud.

[Delicious_bass]

But, on the other hand, why would he displace a customer that had already made a reservation to accomodate this person. If this person had made reservations earlier and had a spot, I would not expect detlef to give up their spot if someone else called in requesting the time slot, unless of course it was me and I was requesting the Huddler Special.

I thought that took place in one of the back rooms of the establishment?

[redrumjuice]

FWIW, we actually do a dinner event about once a month or so that is specifically aimed at families with kids. Our private room has a large flat screen TV and we show kids movies Like this down there.

 

 

Wow, that's pretty cool.

[i_am_the_swammi]

I also wouldn't take my son to a restaurant that needed reservations.

 

While that might be good, if you continue to take your kid only to fast food/Applebees/etc, where granted they have more latitude to be themselves, it will take them that much longer to understand what its like to eat at a finer establishment.

 

While it may cause some embarrassment at first, it is pretty important to get your kids to be able to understand and act appropriately in certain instances, be it a nice restaurant, a church, the movies, whatever. We taught our kids as early as possible, and now that our youngest of four is 4 years old, we can all go pretty much anywhere, and know they behave 95% of the time. Four kids, oldest 10, and we can eat anywhere we like.

 

Its pretty cool...and it was no sweat getting there.