buddahj Posted July 14, 2010 Share Posted July 14, 2010 When your kids tell you to turn off the oldies music...and it's Pearl Jam. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
whomper Posted July 14, 2010 Share Posted July 14, 2010 On who? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SEC=UGA Posted July 14, 2010 Share Posted July 14, 2010 When you go out with your wife to a romantic dinner and realize neither of you can f'n read the menu in the low light. When you can help a brother out by finding this link in 7 seconds Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
montster Posted July 14, 2010 Share Posted July 14, 2010 when you stay up till 3 a.m. saturday night/sunday morning, and it takes you until tuesday to recover ... and you weren't even drinking. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rocknrobn26 Posted July 14, 2010 Share Posted July 14, 2010 When the noises your joints make drowned out your snoring. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
whomper Posted July 14, 2010 Share Posted July 14, 2010 When the noises your joints make drowned out your snoring. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
billay Posted July 14, 2010 Share Posted July 14, 2010 When you can help a brother out by finding this link in 7 seconds Man, there's old, and then there's "taking a magnifying glass to a restaurant" old. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dmarc117 Posted July 14, 2010 Share Posted July 14, 2010 it sounds like a rice krispies commercial when u get up to walk 1st thing in the morning........ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lennykravitz2004 Posted July 14, 2010 Share Posted July 14, 2010 When somebody starts a forum thread of "you know you're old when..." and realize ALL of the posts apply to you (about one month shy of turning 37). How about... when somebody uses the word "forum", the last thing you think about is "Penthouse Forum". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chief Dick Posted July 14, 2010 Share Posted July 14, 2010 When you sit on your nuts and rack yourself. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Inhiding Posted July 14, 2010 Share Posted July 14, 2010 When talking about communism at a family get together and one of your nephews ask if that was when Rocky fought Ivan Drago. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Delicious_bass Posted July 14, 2010 Share Posted July 14, 2010 (edited) You start referring to people as young punks. And you are only 36 yourself. That is me. And Lately I've found myself watching out the window mumbling "lovely kids" when they step off the sidewalk onto my lawn... ............. you pull a hammie going 2nd to home in softball. 50-50 its going to happen tomorrow night in my league to someone on my team. Guaranteed to happen during the tourney we play at the end of the summer where we camp up in northern MN, drink our faces off all night and then play ball all dehydrated and hung over... ETA: "lovely" = nice filter Edited July 14, 2010 by Delicious_bass Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gopher Posted July 14, 2010 Share Posted July 14, 2010 Sadly, I can relate to about 90% of the things in this thread. A few additional things I thought of as I read through these: When the stripper calls you sir. Yeah, it bothers me when anybody calls me sir, unless it's a bell boy at a nice hotel, or something similar (where I know they're pretty much required to say that to any male over the age of 18.) Unfortunately, I have noticed that I'm hearing it more and more lately. You start referring to people as young punks. And you are only 36 yourself. I've been doing that for the better part of 10 years, if not longer. Doesn't help that I've spent the last 15 years working in an industry where we hire a lot of them... pants-on-the-ground, hats on sideways, talk like they're either from another country or have a mouth full of cereal, wouldn't know a hard day's work if it hit them in the face, etc. Absolute punks. When you and the Mrs. are bumping uglies and you need a injury timeout. Worse yet... you don't even have an injury, but just need a "break" halfway through. Not sure if that should be considered a good or bad thing. Your wife discovers melted ice cream that you left in the fridge instead of the freezer. A few weeks ago, I came home from work, apparently walked over to the trash can, dropped my car keys in it (didn't realize this until later in the evening), and sat down on the couch. I don't think I even put anything else in the trash (don't know for sure, since I don't remember doing it), so it's not even like I can use the excuse that my keys were in the same hand, or whatever. A couple of hours later, I couldn't find my keys... but the more I thought about it, the more I had this sneaking feeling that I had put them in the trash (which I've never done before, by the way). Sure enough... there they were, sitting right on top of all the other trash in the can. Very weird. If that crap is happening to me now, I can't begin to imagine what stupid diaper dirt I'll be doing if I ever make it to truly old age/scenility. It gets worse when you spend an hour a week ripping those hairs out, and they still ask if you want an ear hair trim. I'm growin eyebrow hairs on my freakin eye lids now. How am I supposed to trim them? I can only see them when my eyes are closed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gopher Posted July 14, 2010 Share Posted July 14, 2010 Had to break my reply into two posts (too many quotes)....... another benchmark that you arent as young as you used to be is when most players in pro sports are younger than you Worse yet, pro sports players were born in a year that you can remember like it was yesterday. When I started seeing kids of the pro players I watched growing up starting to play, I felt super old. That started happening to me several years ago... at first, it was sort of a shock. Now, it seems like 20% of MLB is made up of kids whose fathers I remember playing in the 80's. Football and basketball aren't quite as bad (for obvious reasons... not too many play into their 40's), but it makes the ones who are out there that much more painful... Jordan's kid, Ewing's kid, etc. It seems like those guys were playing five years ago. A few others: - I am the oldest of four brothers... I'm 35, the next is 33, the third is 30, and the youngest is 20. Yeah, I know... pretty spread out, especially between #3 and #4. I was home in MN for 10 days recently... got a chance to go to my nephew/niece's little league games. When I see "kids" that my younger brother went to school with, and they have TEENAGE kids of their own, it blows my mind. Then, I realize that they (the parents) are probably 32-34 (my brother's age range), and it sinks in that people that age do sometimes already have kids in their teens. Still doesn't make it any easier to swallow, though. What's really weird is when kids that went to school with the 30-year-old have kids that are close to THEIR teens. Crazy. It doesn't help that I have no kids yet (we're expecting our first in September ), so it's even harder to put these things in perspective. - This year, I'm starting to realize that high school seniors were basically born in the same year that I was a senior in HS. Talk about a kick to the gut. - I can remember, as a teenager, thinking that it sounded REALLY weird to say that we were in "the 90's." Couldn't really remember much of the 70's, so that was the first time that I had experienced a new decade. Saying "Nineteen ninety" just sounded strange. Then came 2000... even more strange. I remember wondering what it would sound like to say "2010"... would we call it "Two thousand ten" or "Twenty ten", or what? It all seemed so far away at the time... almost like when you're in grade school and teachers asked you to imagine what things would be like in the next century. Now, we're in 2010, and it seems like all of that other stuff happened not so long ago. - My parents and grandparents always said that time flies by, and it does so more and more, as you get older. I always understood what they meant by the first part (time DOES go by fast, at least sometimes... particularly when you're doing something fun), but never really knew what they meant by the second part of that statement. Now, I completely understand it, and agree... the older I get, the faster weeks, months, years, and decades go by. Sorry... didn't mean to depress anyone. Maybe I'm at my mid-life crisis. I'm sure I could think of many more... I'll post again if I think of any really good ones. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chief Dick Posted July 14, 2010 Share Posted July 14, 2010 Maybe I'm at my mid-life crisis. We'd get you some hookers and blow, but because of your age you would probably snort the hooker and have sex with the coke. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TimC Posted July 14, 2010 Share Posted July 14, 2010 (edited) A few weeks ago, I came home from work, apparently walked over to the trash can, dropped my car keys in it (didn't realize this until later in the evening), and sat down on the couch. I don't think I even put anything else in the trash (don't know for sure, since I don't remember doing it), so it's not even like I can use the excuse that my keys were in the same hand, or whatever. A couple of hours later, I couldn't find my keys... but the more I thought about it, the more I had this sneaking feeling that I had put them in the trash (which I've never done before, by the way). Sure enough... there they were, sitting right on top of all the other trash in the can. Very weird. If that crap is happening to me now, I can't begin to imagine what stupid diaper dirt I'll be doing if I ever make it to truly old age/scenility. Whoa...this happened to me last night. I found them in an old empty small flower pot (we're gonna re-use it one day) on a shelf in the garage. I had a strange feeling about my keys about an hour after I got home. I retraced my steps and for some unknown reason looked in the flower pot and they were in there. I couldn't remember why. I finally remembered this morning and I must've put them there when I was getting the dog a treat from the box on the same shelf in the garage...but I'm only using that an excuse really to justify me putting my keys in some old flower pot. Weird. Edited July 14, 2010 by TimC Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SEC=UGA Posted July 14, 2010 Share Posted July 14, 2010 Whoa...this happened to me last night. I found them in an old empty small flower pot (we're gonna re-use it one day) on a shelf in the garage. I had a strange feeling about my keys about an hour after I got home. I retraced my steps and for some unknown reason looked in the flower pot and they were in there. I couldn't remember why. I finally remembered this morning and I must've put them there when I was getting the dog a treat from the box on the same shelf in the garage...but I'm only using that an excuse really to justify me putting my keys in some old flower pot. Weird. The misplaced keys started happening to me years ago. The worst scenario I remember was in college (I'm pretty certain alcohol was involved) when I couldn't find my car keys... Found them a day later, I believe, in the vegetable crisper in the fridge... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SteelBunz Posted July 14, 2010 Share Posted July 14, 2010 When your kids tell you to turn off the oldies music...and it's Pearl Jam. Along the same lines. I was at a HS graduation party for a niece a few years ago. She had a "mixed tape" in the CD player for the party. At one point, a song came on and I started singing the lyrics. The kids all thought their Aunt Jules was SO cool because I knew the song! Turned out to be a Pat Benetar remake. They had no idea it wasn't a "new" song. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
montster Posted July 14, 2010 Share Posted July 14, 2010 Along the same lines. I was at a HS graduation party for a niece a few years ago. She had a "mixed tape" in the CD player for the party. At one point, a song came on and I started singing the lyrics. The kids all thought their Aunt Jules was SO cool because I knew the song! Turned out to be a Pat Benetar remake. They had no idea it wasn't a "new" song. that's like that commercial with the hamsters rapping to "the choice is yours" ("you can get with this, or you can get with that ..."). the kids who like it now weren't even born when it came out. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cre8tiff Posted July 15, 2010 Share Posted July 15, 2010 When you can help a brother out by finding this link in 7 seconds I'd rather starve. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DMD Posted July 15, 2010 Share Posted July 15, 2010 Probably starting next year or 2012 I will be drafting a fantasy player who was not alive when I started playing fantasy football. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Big Country Posted July 15, 2010 Share Posted July 15, 2010 You know you're old when the first time you met DMD's kid, he was in the outfield picking flowers...... and now it's my son that is doing that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SteelBunz Posted July 15, 2010 Share Posted July 15, 2010 that's like that commercial with the hamsters rapping to "the choice is yours" ("you can get with this, or you can get with that ..."). the kids who like it now weren't even born when it came out. Doo Dah Dippity! Probably starting next year or 2012 I will be drafting a fantasy player who was not alive when I started playing fantasy football. Whoa.....there's a reality check. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
whomper Posted July 15, 2010 Share Posted July 15, 2010 Along the same lines. I was at a HS graduation party for a niece a few years ago. She had a "mixed tape" in the CD player for the party. At one point, a song came on and I started singing the lyrics. The kids all thought their Aunt Jules was SO cool because I knew the song! Turned out to be a Pat Benetar remake. They had no idea it wasn't a "new" song. My daughters love that show glee. In that show they sing a lot of songs that were popular "back in the day" but my kids have no idea they arent new. My daughter was singing "Dont stop believing" the other day and I was like Hey thats Journey where did you hear that song ? She said its not Journey, its from the cast of glee Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TimC Posted July 15, 2010 Share Posted July 15, 2010 Along the same lines. I was at a HS graduation party for a niece a few years ago. She had a "mixed tape" in the CD player for the party. At one point, a song came on and I started singing the lyrics. The kids all thought their Aunt Jules was SO cool because I knew the song! Turned out to be a Pat Benetar remake. They had no idea it wasn't a "new" song. I'm laughing. Get this...when the SO's kids lived with us and they'd be pumping out their "new" song that they didn't know was a remake, of course, I'd go back to the computer room where I had my old LP's and turntable and pull out the original and start jamming to it. They'd freak out that it wasn't new. One of my favorite things to do. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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